Malkin,
I just checked my pm box and found out that it is full. If you responded to the message yesterday, then you can resend your message. If you are not interested, than no worries.

I read the 1st 20 or so posts of your thread on the problem you had Sunday with the choir and I must say it brings back some memories of what I went through late 80's/early/mid 90's. I did plenty of parish hopping, noticing the differences at each parish, why things were done differently, etc. I became a little more active in my parish, being a greeter, being more social, with a very, very short stint on the liturgical committee(what an eyeopener I got in just one meeting-and the leader was the DRE who I was under for Confirmation class). Some of these people, whether they realise it or not, have an agenda that is not inemicable to to the Catholic faith.
I finally did find the "most conservative" parish in the area, and became very close friends with the elderly pastor, God rest his soul. Please pray for him.
At about the same time as finding this conservative parish, I also found the indult laitn Mass. I was certainly impressed, as was my friend with whom I had been searching around with. I would get back a few times. I wasn't consistent in TLM attendance until about two years after finding it.
By the grace of God, an elderly Camrelite friar who was saying the indult Mass for a group of Sisters took me under his care and helped me see what modernism was and how it had blown into and taken over many Catholics.
After much prayer and counsel, I finally left the New Liturgy for good. I recognise that what you are trying to do at your parish. You want faithful prayers/readings, proper gestures and the like. I was there. Me and my friend somewhat stood out. People thought we were seminarians or something becaues, like you, we tried to follow what we understood the rubrics to be-bowing during the Creed, kneeling for Communion, etc. But the realisation finally sunk in on me that what is being done at your local parish cannot convey the pure, unadulterated Catholic faith to an individual. You may be able to find piety/devotion at certain places, during events(processions, benediction, etc), but orthodoxy will be evading you if at the same place error and abuse(authorised and unauthorised) is a continuous, ongoing happening.
I notice that you assist at the TLM in your area. I think I went by, is it, St Boniface's Church when I had business in Pittsburgh last year. I went to my first TLM at Holy Trinity in Boston(now closed.) It might have been the most beautiful church in the archdiocese. It is down the street from where the famous Coconut Grove fire was in the 40's. I believe the Jesuit who was assigned there was on the scene shortly after it broke out. Just a little bit of trivia for you.
I would seriously pray on your situation. I have not gotten into any of the specifics of why I won't have anything to do with the New Liturgy. I know it can get some people upset/hot under the collar, but I am more than willing to chat about why I think the way I do and how I got to understand certain things.
Have a blessed and happy Eastertide,

In JMJ,
Joe