The Very Fun Club

Steven Wright Quotes

I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?

If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?

If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?

There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.

What's another word for Thesaurus?

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

Save the snowman!

So true, Po, so true.

Where am I? Oh, just getting ready to go clean the kitchen after the morning scramble. Then I have to decide whether to go upstairs and clean or downstairs and clean. Both need a thorough cleaning. But also I have to get to the bank and the post office. So much to do, so little time.

Well I get ready to clean. I think , will it be front middle or back. then i go Nah...... I need to find something enjoyable, The same dirt will still be there tomorrow.

Life is a series of hoops to jump through. Ever feel that way?

Well, Didi daaaaaaarlllling!

Where am I? Oh, just getting ready to go clean the kitchen after the morning scramble. Then I have to decide whether to go upstairs and clean or downstairs and clean. Both need a thorough cleaning. But also I have to get to the bank and the post office. So much to do, so little time.

Where's my Frayund?

I misses you Mrs.

Fr. Merrin, are you slummin'?

Today I cleaned out the guinea pig cage, phew... and moved it... and gave them a new "toy".

Two females, and they really are girlish.

They live up to their name in the eating dept.

I'm just up in the wee hours, but heading back to bed.

And that's the news from Lake Wobegone.

I wish you were here to have enjoyed it with us.

How I wish, how I wish you were here...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1moiym6-Nk