Confessions

Many people fear confession. So do I. Basically we acknowledge our sinfulness. And as scripture says, anyone who says they do not have sins is a liar. everyone has sin in there life to one degree or another. God does not need us to confess, we need to confess. it is like skimming the grease off the top of a kettle of soup. Best of luck to you on your journey home. I'll keep you and all RCIA candidates in my prayers. Try not to fear confession. Just hate the wrong that we do. Freckle face

Freckle Face

Thank you for pointing that out for others who may not be aware...

I am converting from a Protestant background and was baptized as an infant and even experienced confirmation in grade 8.

so prior to Easter Vigil and full acceptance to the Church I will be required to go to Confession.

If already baptized, then, you may need confession. If not baptized, then, you go through scrutinites, during Lent. If you have been away from the church for awhile and are coming back, believe me, no matter what you have to confess, the benefits of the sacrament are unbelievable. The conditions for a mortal sin, are, I think, if you no the matter to be wrong and do it anyway with your full intention. If you did not believe it to be wrong at the time, then, that would cancel one of the three things necessary in making it mortal. We only need to confess mortal sins. However it is good to confess even venial sins. The sacrament of Reconciliation gives us the grace to make us stronger to hold out to temptation in the future. I most always go to a priest that I do not know well, and I do not go face to face. I'm usually too ashamed of myself. So you can be anonymous. It is God, who forgives, through the priest. Freckle face.

You've mentioned you are part of the RCIA. Have you been baptized? If not, please talk to the priest. I was under the understanding that those that have not been baptized are not required to go to confession until after Baptism. And upon which the slate is clean when baptized. Then from that point on, confession would be necessary if you have a grave sin. so check it out. Freckle face.

cvbs21

Yes, I have spoken to my Priest mainly about my incredible fear (and I do think it is a fear at this point) of confessing my sins to him directly, but that I do not think that I could confess to anyone else, he knows me and I would feel awful saying some of the things I'm going to have to say to a total stranger, and I did mention to him that there were things that I simply did not think were wrong and he told me just not to confess them and, as time went by, if I felt the need to confess to them that would be perfectly fine, and if not, just don't confess. I did tell him that I could confess anyway but he told me there was no point if I wasn't truly repentant for my actions so now I'm a bit stuck. Join the Catholic Faith and confess ALL of my sins, including ones that I do not feel sorry for/ do not think are sins, or join the Catholic Faith only confessing sins that I believe are sins and that I am truly repentant for.
Don't know what to do.

I went 8 years between confessions - a revert if you will.

When I went back, I had many "big" things to confess. I picked a priest that I knew well (I knew he would be kind and gentle) and I went face to face. I fully expected that he would gasp in horror or fall off of his chair, but he never even batted an eye. That confession was literally life changing for me. It only lasted about 5 minutes, I don't think he gave any earth shattering advice, and I don't recall what my penance was, but I do know that the weight of the world lifted from my shoulders and I floated through the next several days.

Whether you go to your own priest or another priest, whether you go face-to-face or behind a screen is nothing more than a personal preference.

Now instead of waiting 8 years, I go every month or two. I go to my parish priest (we only have one) and I go face-to-face and he knows me by name. I have never been treated unkindly, and *if* he remembers my sins, he gives no indication in our other dealings.

It helps me to remember that it is God that I am confessing to, and he already knows my sins. There couldn't be anything worse than offending God, so confessing to another person (and one bound to absolute secrecy) isn't really that bad in the scheme of things. Humbling, but not horrible.

There is nothing that you have in your list of sins that the priest has not heard already - probably hundreds or thousands of times. Sexual sins are probably the most common. And you don't need to go into excrutiating detail. "I had sex before I was married with my fiance for several years" is probably plenty enough information. "I was impure with myself once a week or so during my teenage years" covers a lot.

As far as not agreeing with church teachings, I had some of those, too. I finally had to realize that even though I did not necessarily agree or understand some things, I did have to ACCEPT the teachings. And quite possibly, *I* was the one that was wrong; not the church that Jesus left in His place that has been here for 2000+ years. That was an ongoing process.

Someone said they were worried about facing their priest at Mass after confession. To me, that is the best time. When you are standing in the line for Holy Communion, your soul is as spotless as it was on the day you were baptized. (and the priest knows it). How awesome is it to receive Jesus in that state?!

cvbs: to answer your last question, the ones who haven't been to confession in years probably know that there is some "work" to be done in their lives. Better to go on in blissful ignorance than to take a good, honest look at yourself and see what needs fixing, I suppose. Remember that confession is a sacrament of HEALING.

Perhaps there is someone who can answer this with experience.

In speaking to a couple of different ladies ~ one from the Church and the other at an Event ~ both have told me they go to another Church for Confession and wouldn't go to their own Priest.

That seems in a way sad. While I can understand and completely respect that they do this, it's even more confusing.

There are others that haven't been to confession in years and "don't want to be in my position".

Why is this?

Karoline

That's the hardest part of Confession as well for me. I know the Churches teachings and beliefs now but they were not a part of my life beofre.

So it is a hard to look back and realize you are now looking at your past in a completely different way. What I may have considered life lessons or perhaps "mistakes" are a form of sin in the eyes of the Catholic Church.

I have a lot to discern about...and pray for guidance.

I do believe in the sacrament of Confession and the Seal of Confession. I think what makes it hard is dealing with everything all at once, face to face.

I do not even know how to begin this process ~ except by being honest with myself~

Have you spoken to your Priest about the fact that you do not (at this point) feel that certain things are wrong? I haven't AT ALL!!!

I keep hoping for clarification....

Scared Witless. Those are the two words that come into my head when I think about my first confession, I am going through the RCIA process at the moment, was baptised at birth and I have to confess to 21 years of sins. I really, really don't want to confess some things, especially things that the Church thinks is wrong but I do not (yet). I don't know what to do, my first confession will be face to face with the Priest who is doing my one-to-one RCIA meetings, I don't know how I will be able to look him in the face the following week, even though we have discussed it and he says that he can never remember what people have said anyway. I can see the scriptural basis but having come from a protestant background it is very hard for me to imagine that I should have to tell a Priest all my wrong-doings.

Heathernoel

Sorry for your loss~

I cannot speak in certainty but know I must confess from Baptism (as a baby) to present! I think that each confession is such a personal and moving experience that the length of time varies for us all. I have spoken to a couple of people and one mans was over an hour and the others 30 minutes.

From what I understand my first confession is done at a scheduled time with Father and will be face to face.

This doesn't bother me as much as the thought of facing him the next time at mass or at the next RCIA class.

I was given the obvious advice which is to pray and to really prepare for this. To make a list ~
and to realize that we are all human and we all sin.

It truly is a humbling experience and one that I feel I must embrace and face head on!

Crawron

You confess every week ~ I seem to remember reading somewhere that Pope John Paul also confessed weekly.

Your advice is reassuring and very helpful!