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Preparing For Death Of My Mother

Group created by mothermimi

Support to members who are about to lose a parent or members who can share ideas, i.e., music, scripture. eulogy's.

Group Activity in Group Forum
Group Wall Messages 1 to 9 of 9
  1. bmaj
    Jan 16, '10 6:48 am
    How wonderful to hear that your Mom never turned away from the Church! I think we all go through periods of our lives where our faith seems to be stronger than at other times, we pray more, we have more time for contemplation, etc.. I bet she will continue to remember the tried and true prayers from long ago even as the illness progresses- and it will continue to give both of you so much comfort to say them together! Not to mention the amazing benefits from Our Lord and Blessed Mother that the prayers and even just "talking" to them will bring.

    God's love and peace be with you all, and a prayer is heading your way.
  2. lauraperson
    Jan 12, '10 6:56 pm
    hi brnaj, and laying hands,
    Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. My mother is a cradle Catholic. The conversion to which I refer is the conversion of her soul--she wants to know our faith, the things she missed being catechized as a young girl. She tells me that they went to mass, prayed the rosary, said their novenas with not much explanation. I definitely call that faith--she never has turned away from the Church. We've recently started praying the rosary and it is so precious to do that with my mom. We rarely prayed together. I am grateful for each day. God bless you all.
  3. bmaj
    Jan 3, '10 3:55 pm
    Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your sweet mother. My dear MIL had dementia for over four years before our merciful Lord took her into His loving arms and brought her home to Him. She also had a wonderful sense of humor, and she kept it through almost the entire time!! We were so grateful for that, and it really helped when we would visit with her - such a blessing during rough times. It's so good that your siblings are all helping to join in assisting her. Please try to pray with your mother if you can - it can be so wonderfully reassuring for all of you! My MIL forgot so many things as her disease progressed, but she never forgot the prayers she knew all through the years. I don't know if your mother knows very many since she only recently converted, but if she doesn't it would still benefit to pray with her. God will be with all of you during this challenge no matter what.
    Please be careful if your parents live alone so that she doesn't wander outside in the cold not realizing what she may be doing or leave the stove on accidentally. It's important to be aware of any kinds of dangers like that as the weeks and months go by.
    Again, God's love and my prayers for all of you.
  4. LayingHands
    Jan 1, '10 9:40 pm
    Dear Lady, know that in preparing for their transitions, GOD the Father is with you always, in the spirit he placed inside, of all his us, his children. Their returning to him is the promise of his dive immortality and his divine plan for all of us. You will need to pray to GOD and ask for strength and his unconditional love with their healings and also to awaken their wisdom about his LAWS for the perfection of their souls/spirits. In this too, dear one, you are also GOD's perfected spirit to heal them by your faith, in his divine promises for all humanity. Lay thy hands on GOD directly and open yourself to heal in his name. It is your birthright, as he instructed the Ancients B.C...I am facing my father's transition too. He is 80 and I am enjoying him to the fullest every moment I am able...I hug and speak with him daily. I am at peace within, knowing he is prepared to return in soul/spirit, blessedly reabsorbed back to our Father GOD. As we live this life, in practicing GOD's Divine LOVE and his Divine GOOD, Sympathizing with every moments teaching situations and with all life, we reflect GOD's Goodness within his spirit which lives within father's return will be something to rejoice about, for me!
  5. lauraperson
    Jan 1, '10 8:55 pm
    My mother was recently diagnosed with dementia--what kind, I don't know. She gets confused and frustrated when she can't do the things she used to do and it is difficult for her speak her thoughts. She has an amazingly good attitude and has a good sense of humor. Despite the cross she bears knowing she will be changing, she cares for my bipolar father who sadly depends on her for everything. She is the strongest person I know. We, her five children, have come together to help her with meds, doctor appointments, and other chores. Knowing she will at some point be leaving earth, we've grown closer and share a joy that makes each day precious. My mother has also had a conversion and wants to know her faith better. I feel like we're helping her prepare for the journey to the end of her life. I am open to any suggestions from anyone who has experienced any thing like this.

    God bless you.
  6. oliviaashley
    Dec 30, '09 12:00 pm
    You're a wonderful daughter, remember that! I'm going through something similar. My mother is recuperating from knee replacement surgery, & out of 6 children it's been my brother & I! I decided to let it go & enjoy spending the extra time with her. Try to hang on to the love you have for your mother, & NOT the anger you have towards your sister. Trust me, I know all about being the only one~ I will pray for you & your mother~ God Bless you both~
  7. bmaj
    Dec 30, '09 4:01 am
    Losing a parent is one of the most difficult things in the world, but it's amazing how you can feel signs of God's love around you as you prepare for it as well as after. Praying really helps open yourself up to His comfort all through the process and beyond - and quietly listening for His help and wisdom.
    I've also found that some days I feel my Mom's presence with me even closer now than she was when she was alive as I pray for her and request her prayers to God also to assist me in this life. God gives us help in so many ways.
    His loving peace to everyone here.
  8. Crumpy
    Dec 19, '09 8:30 pm
    My mom is 85 and lives at home with me. I've been with her for over 9 years and we've had a great, quiet time. Her infirmities are worsening and she doesn't want to go to a nursing home -- so I've been doing and plan to keep doing the best I can to honor her wishes to be at home, as long as I can.

    I had to have outpatient surgery a month ago; thank God I have been recovering quickly.

    I put up the Christmas manger in front of our silver plastic electric menorah. It's quite a brightly lit display. The gift bags are full and waiting for a warm Christmas eve get-together.

    The worst part, I am estranged from my sister, who has mental problems. Don't know how that will turn out if she shows up. She has a bad knee and is planning for surgery in the new year. She normally takes care of my mother's hair, which is looking rather ratty right now.

    My sister was in Cancun for two weeks at Thanksgiving. In what has become the typical snub, she comes back and doesn't call my mom either to say she is safe at home or to check up on my mom. This is my sister's sadistic side, to cause psychological pain whenever she can and as often as she can. My mother puts up with this, for the hair care. But, I can't handle my sister's contempt and constant derisive comments.

    When my mother dies, I will have no part of my sister at a funeral. I plan a quick cremation and burial, after organ donation (there is no upper age limit for organ donation; it all depends on her health of her organs at the time of her passing.)

    So, that is my preparation for my mother's death -- aside from a lot of partying with my mom and a lot of prayer of thanksgiving and intercession on her behalf.
  9. bmaj
    Dec 16, '09 4:07 am
    My prayers are with you and everyone going through this. I don't know what your current situations are, but I can recommend that even if your Mom doesn't appear to be conscious or hear what you're saying to her in her last months on earth, please continue to talk to her and tell her everything you want her to hear - such as how much you love her and how our Good Lord and her deceased loved ones will be welcoming her with open arms (or anything you may wish you had done differently, too....). When my Mom passed away, she appeared to be in a deep coma but had a heart monitor attached in the nursing home. When I told her all those types of things and cried by her side, the monitor started going wild, so I think she definitely knew what I was saying..... She died about two hours later as I was driving home. I wish I had been able to stay with her until the end. (That's another recommendation if you're able.)
    Peace and God's love to all of you.


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