BC as a back up

[ElizaE]

I have been married for almost a year. I hate to admit it but I am using contraception. We abstain during the part of the month when I could possibly ovulate and therefore unintentionally cause an abortion. Is this wrong? But now I am asking myself, then why use the pill if you think that you are not ovulating and therefore you can't become pregnant.

When we were married, I was starting my 2nd year of med school and my husband was starting his 1st year. The stress of it all on top of worrying about being pregnant plus I think that I was underinformed about other options, led me to think that BC was the best way to go. I knew that it went against Catholic Teachings and I felt bad about it every single day and still do.

Now as I am nearing the end of 2nd year, I am very interested in NFP. I am thinking about taking a class in my diocese but they aren't offered until December (there are some earlier but I will be away on rotations). In the mean time, I just don't know what to do?

But what should I do when I get to my OB/GYN rotation. I refuse to do or participate in abortions and dispensation of the moring-after pill. But would I be a hiporcrite if I say that I do not want to perscribe the pill?

Please do not yell at me and say that I should know better. I already know that. I think that I just feel lost in a time of my life where we are not ready to have kids yet. I hate sinning and going against the Church, I just didn't know what else to do.

[trailblazer]

Blessed sister in Christ,

I sincerely doubt that people of good faith will get mad or yell at you. You are in a secure place for lay advise. However, I highly recommend finding a good spiritual director who is solid in faith; you should find this beneficial for discussing these and other issues.

I am embarrassed to have to say that my wife and I used contraception as well. I have grown substantially in faith and knowledge of Church teachings since then. Even though we did that awful thing, I do not believe that speaking against it is wrong or hiporcritical. Being hipocritical would be speaking against such things to present a false image of righteousness while continuing to do them ourself. Coming into an awareness of truth and speaking about it is totally different and right.

You might want to brush up on the moral teaching regarding contraception. It is much more profound than most people realize. I wish I had time tonight to go through a couple of my books on moral theology and put together a synopsis for you. Perhaps, another time.

As far as your OB/GNY rotation, you can simply tell your advisor that contraception for the purpose of preventing life and abortion are against your Catholic faith and your conscience. Therefore, while you can participate in most everything, you caanot compromise your faith. They may not understand totally, but I believe that they would have to accept it and let you complete your rotation. I once went to confession with an former surgeon who told me that he knew of a pharmaceutical rep who sued successfully his company who fired him for not promoting a birth control medication; it was forced to give him his job back. I have a good Catholic friend who is a practicing internist who would probably be happy to dialog with you. If you send me a personal e-mail, I'll pass it along to him and ask him to e-mail you back (he is terrible at picking up e-mails...usually his wife needs to let him now one is in).

May God bless you!

In Christ,
Bob

[1ke]

Originally Posted by ElizaE

I have been married for almost a year. I hate to admit it but I am using contraception. We abstain during the part of the month when I could possibly ovulate and therefore unintentionally cause an abortion. Is this wrong? But now I am asking myself, then why use the pill if you think that you are not ovulating and therefore you can't become pregnant.

When we were married, I was starting my 2nd year of med school and my husband was starting his 1st year. The stress of it all on top of worrying about being pregnant plus I think that I was underinformed about other options, led me to think that BC was the best way to go. I knew that it went against Catholic Teachings and I felt bad about it every single day and still do.

Now as I am nearing the end of 2nd year, I am very interested in NFP. I am thinking about taking a class in my diocese but they aren't offered until December (there are some earlier but I will be away on rotations). In the mean time, I just don't know what to do?

But what should I do when I get to my OB/GYN rotation. I refuse to do or participate in abortions and dispensation of the moring-after pill. But would I be a hiporcrite if I say that I do not want to perscribe the pill?

Please do not yell at me and say that I should know better. I already know that. I think that I just feel lost in a time of my life where we are not ready to have kids yet. I hate sinning and going against the Church, I just didn't know what else to do.

Your own conscience has convicted you that contraception is wrong. Therefore, yes, you should stop using it and start practicing NFP. Your diocese is not the only resource for classes. Check hospitals and nurse practitioners, especially Catholic hospitals. Also, you can find resources online at www.creightonmodel.com and www.fertilitycare.org for Creighton method as well as www.ccli.org for couple to couple league (Sympto-Thermal Method). You can also look up the Billings Ovluation Model online. Additionally there are a couple of good books you can buy:

The Art of Natural Family Planning by Kippley and
Taking Charge of Your Fertility (forget the author)

TCOYF also has a website.

As for your practice as a doctor-- again your own conscience has already provided the answer. You cannot cooperate in an intrinsic evil, which both abortion and contraception (in all its forms) are.

[Lorarose]

I have been married for almost a year. I hate to admit it but I am using contraception. We abstain during the part of the month when I could possibly ovulate and therefore unintentionally cause an abortion. Is this wrong? But now I am asking myself, then why use the pill if you think that you are not ovulating and therefore you can't become pregnant

Your answer is right here.
You're already accustomed to abstaining during your potential fertile time.
If you take the time to research NFP (it is not the rythm method!) you will see you don't need that pill anyway.

You monitor your basal body temperature, cervical mucous, and cervical position. These signs will tell you what you need to know regarding your fertility. NFP gives you guidelines on how to safely gage your times of abstinence and your times of nonabstinence.

[ames61]

ElizaE,
I'd also suggest looking up the Pope Paul VI Institute website. Dr. Hilgers just completed a medical textbook on NaPro technology last year which would supplement what you are learning. Also they might be able to refer you to a someone trained in your area on the Creighton model who could teach you one on one.

You are in a position to be a tremendous witness. Getting on board with this teaching as a physician, even as a student, would be a witness to your faith for a great many people. But more importantly, to trust God in this matter, by following the Church's teaching would help you grow in your own relationship with God. Its definitely a leap of faith, as children now would make your life more complicated (though not impossible). But right now its like you are saying to God "I trust you in all these areas God, but not this one" And of course "this one" is the area in which we are most able to image God as a communion of persons in the union of man and wife. You've made a good start in abstaining for some days even while on the pill. But He wants all of you.