Could you raise your family Catholic and JW?

George80 · #1 Apr 5, '12, 9:55 am

I have been dating this woman for a little over a year, and she is wonderful. I converted to Catholicism 10 years ago, and my love for God and faith in the teachings of the Catholic Church are strong. I had heard of Jehovah Witnesses before but I really did not know what they believe compared to other religions. Some online investigating of the JW faith has left me feeling uneasy about their teachings.

We began discussing the idea of having a family and how we would raise the kids, and of course she would want to share her faith with her kids and teach them what she believes, along with taking them to the Kingdom Hall. I of course want to raise them Catholic and bring them to Church with me, so she is comfortable with the idea of raising them in both faiths.

To me this is very distressing; exposing the kids to these teachings that I just don't personally believe are true. In some religions there are very similar beliefs, like between Catholics and Lutheran; at least you have a solid common foundation. I am not expecting any of you to tell me what to do, but merely looking for people in common situations and overall opinions.

-George

MaryandJoseph · #2 Apr 5, '12, 10:17 am

To begin with,,,JW's are not even Christian as they do NOT believe in the Holy Trinity.

Investigate the JW's doctrines of faith and compare them to our Catholic Christian doctrines and the differences should jump out at you at once.

Now fast forward and think of children being reared in two totally DIFFERENT faiths and you can imagine the confusion this will cause. Add to this the fact that you will most likely not worship as a Whole family.

As a practicing Catholic, you are obligated to rear children in the True Faith and bring them up Catholic, she on her part most likely has the same obligation(correct me if I am wrong on this), so the big question is.....Who will yield to the others faith? Are you willing to leave your Catholic faith or will she be willing to leave her JW faith?

HUGE red flags are popping up with this. Pray long and hard on this one and may God lead you in the correct direction.

TeenageConvert · #3 Apr 5, '12, 10:47 am

I would highly advise against it..
JW are not Christians, their baptisms are not valid.
Even if this girl would be okay with your children being baptized Catholic(which I doubt she will be), I'm almost certain there are people at the JW kingdom hall that would try to convert your children.
They also don't celebrate holidays like Christmas, or Easter.
I just think it would end up being a big mess

adf417 · #4 Apr 5, '12, 10:50 am

Here is a previous thread on this subject that should answer your question. If not let us know.

http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=633861

God bless!!!

Bezant · #5 Apr 5, '12, 10:58 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by George80

I have been dating this woman for a little over a year, and she is wonderful. I converted to Catholicism 10 years ago, and my love for God and faith in the teachings of the Catholic Church are strong. I had heard of Jehovah Witnesses before but I really did not know what they believe compared to other religions. Some online investigating of the JW faith has left me feeling uneasy about their teachings.

We began discussing the idea of having a family and how we would raise the kids, and of course she would want to share her faith with her kids and teach them what she believes, along with taking them to the Kingdom Hall. I of course want to raise them Catholic and bring them to Church with me, so she is comfortable with the idea of raising them in both faiths.

To me this is very distressing; exposing the kids to these teachings that I just don't personally believe are true. In some religions there are very similar beliefs, like between Catholics and Lutheran; at least you have a solid common foundation. I am not expecting any of you to tell me what to do, but merely looking for people in common situations and overall opinions.
-George

Hello George, welcome to the forums.

I'm afraid what you understandably hope for isn't realistic, or even fair for any children you might have. It's not possible to be a fully committed Catholic while being a fully committed member to another religion, and it doesn't make sense to be a half-hearted, quasi-member of both.

Interfaith marriages generally struggle over religion once they've kids (unless both parents are non-religious), and their children sometimes experience confusion or reject both religions.

Moreover, Witnesses generally believe that the Catholic Church fell in apostasy and is little better than paganism. Some Witnesses will express that belief more nicely than others, but there's a strong tendency towards self-righteousness in the Witness community. Not only is Catholicism irreconcilable with their religion, but many Witnesses won't hesitate to use deceptive and disrespectful means to win a convert. Bringing young Catholic children to a Kingdom Hall service, and even something as innocent as bible study leaves them fair game to proselytism in my experience. (There was even an issue at our parish a few years ago when Witnesses were interrupting kids as they were walking to Mass, and evangelised them without their parents' permission.)

My

A blessed Holy Thursday to you.

Mintaka · #6 Apr 5, '12, 11:13 am

The kids will be expected to proselytize for the JWs, even when very young, and to do a lot of hard work.

The JW leadership will pressure your wife and kids to either convert you or leave you behind. They will always be nosing into your family business, much worse than even groups like LDS/Mormon leadership.

The kids will be made to feel guilty for celebrating their own birthdays, much less any Christian holidays.

nickybr38 · #7 Apr 5, '12, 11:39 am

I would not raise my child Catholic and ANYTHING ELSE. I would only raise my child Catholic period... which is why I've made the decision not to date outside my faith.

I would strongly suggest you reconsider this relationship. The JW faith is VERY different from the Catholic faith.

If your girlfriend takes her faith seriously she honestly wouldn't be dating you in the first place... and if she starts taking her faith more seriously later you are in for TROUBLE, with a capital T. R.O.U.B.L.E.

Are you aware that they practice shunning?

My aunt and her husband are both JWs. Their son left the faith and they have shunned him so completely that when his father ended up in hospital with a heart attack they REFUSED to let him see his father...

Do you really want your children being raised anywhere near a faith like that?

tundramom · #8 Apr 5, '12, 11:48 am

I married my husband, who is Catholic, while I was still a Mormon. In order for our marriage to be valid, I had to agree that WE would raise them Catholic. If she is a faithful JW, she would have a very difficult time doing that. Thankfully, I was not a great Mormon and while studying what it was I had agreed to, admiring my husband's faith, and obviously the HS working on me... I am now celebrating almost 13 years as a Catholic.

It doesn't work for most, but for me it did.
Steph

tundramom · #9 Apr 5, '12, 11:49 am

... and also in marrying a Catholic, I lost contact with my entire family for almost 15 years. They are starting to come around, but that is absolutely a possibility.
Steph

KateKimmer · #10 Apr 5, '12, 12:21 pm

no you can not. Or let me put it this way, not without a TON of problems!

Christians should not be yoked with unbelievers.
(notice I did not say Catholics should not be yoked with unbelievers. Christians of any denomination need to be yoked to other CHRISTIANS.

Farsight001 · #11 Apr 5, '12, 12:25 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by KateKimmer

no you can not. Or let me put it this way, not without a TON of problems!

Christians should not be yoked with unbelievers.
(notice I did not say Catholics should not be yoked with unbelievers. Christians of any denomination need to be yoked to other CHRISTIANS.

The verse says not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. There is one of him and one of her. That's as equal as it gets, so the verse in no way applies.

Don't get me wrong. I don't see this issue being problem free myself. I just hate it when people try to apply that verse to marriage when it most definitely does not.

Happy Convert · #12 Apr 5, '12, 12:30 pm

I agree with many of the other posts here when they say that this senario is a recipe for disaster. The Jehovah's Witness faith is diametrically opposed to many of the things that we, as Catholics hold sacred. To begin with, they believe neither in the Holy Trinity nor in the divinity of Jesus, and that's just for starters.

I'm afraid that trying to practice two faiths which are directly opposed to one another is a near-certain recipe for marital discord in the long run. That is, unless one spouse (hopefully your wife) converts to the faith of the other. Your children will be confused at best, and, more than likely, will be actively targeted along with you for conversion by the Jehovah's witnesses. Lastly, as others have said your wife would likely be shunned by her family for marrying a Catholic.

lax16 · #13 Apr 5, '12, 12:34 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by George80

I have been dating this woman for a little over a year, and she is wonderful. I converted to Catholicism 10 years ago, and my love for God and faith in the teachings of the Catholic Church are strong. I had heard of Jehovah Witnesses before but I really did not know what they believe compared to other religions. Some online investigating of the JW faith has left me feeling uneasy about their teachings.

We began discussing the idea of having a family and how we would raise the kids, and of course she would want to share her faith with her kids and teach them what she believes, along with taking them to the Kingdom Hall. I of course want to raise them Catholic and bring them to Church with me, so she is comfortable with the idea of raising them in both faiths.

To me this is very distressing; exposing the kids to these teachings that I just don't personally believe are true. In some religions there are very similar beliefs, like between Catholics and Lutheran; at least you have a solid common foundation. I am not expecting any of you to tell me what to do, but merely looking for people in common situations and overall opinions.

-George

No.

LoyalViews · #14 Apr 5, '12, 12:45 pm

Both Catholic AND JW? Certainly not. First of all, they have their own Bible, theology, teachings, etc, different from any other religion. They cannot be called Christian like others have said, and I know of some members of JW who are very, very cult like. I know not all of them a cultish, but I do know some who can't look at me without handing me a Watchtower.

MrsE1022 · #15 Apr 5, '12, 12:53 pm

If the faiths were more similar then you could perhaps make it work. But since the JWs actively preach the OPPOSITE of what the cc teaches then it would be extremely difficult. If you were adding in special traditions ok but not opposite teachings.

I grew up in a house with one protestant parent and on Catholic and that was hard enough. We were always being pulled one way or the other and with contradicting ideologies. Im sure you can imagine if these differences were extreme like with Catholic and JW.

Also may be pretty awkward when the JWs tell your children that Catholics are the Whore of Babylon

I know you are in love, but this could be the beginning of the battle of your life and I'm not sure if I was in the same boat as you I could deal.