Originally Posted by Wanttobechaste
Can you please pray that God will give me and my friend the grace that we need to stop masturbating?
I have several thoughts here. You ask for prayer to aid you in deciding to choose to act differently. You say that you and a friend choose to act. You say you wish to act differently. You say you need grace.
Grace is there. Prayer requires intention. Change of mind requires purpose. The only way to accomplish the goal is to do several things.
Will power is the ability to act based on intention. Will Power can be strenghtened? How....you may want to look for "Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength" by Baumiester found here...
I got a copy from the Library on audio. It is a good overview. The basics are this. You must be healthy. In other words you must eat properly to feed your brain the fuel it sot that it can do what it does. You would not plan to exercise your body without fueling it effeciently. Marathon runners carbohydrate load because they burn carbohydrates as energy in their run. Eliminate all chemicals like alcohol, tobacco, etc so that your brain is not poisoned and is fueled properly. When you view this material you will find that decisions are made better at different times of the day and your will power is stronger at certain times of the day. Make it a point to choose your intent in accord with what is known.
Next understand that just like running or any other exercise the more you exercise your will power the stronger it gets.
Then understand that the way to engage your mind in choosing what you want to do as opposed to what you don't want to do is to ask yourself questions like this...
I do this and I don't want to do this...I would rather do that...The reasons I would rather do that is because...this choosing to do that makes me feel....when I feel like this having chosen to do that then I believe this....continue this process until you have something firm you can hold onto as to the reason to choose that rather than this....This is your strength to choose to do that rather than this....You can also do the same process and ask yourself how you feel and how you think when you do this...Ultimately you will have well defined reasons about this and that and when a choice is to be made you will have the ultimate reason why that is preferred to this..
Now that you have that in place, God gave you all the grace you need, God gave you the ability with the help of the Holy Spirit to turn even groans into prayer...however we cannot hear the response of God if we are not listening...start listening...
Lastly stop discussing what you do wrong with your friend and change the conversations to what you do right....
I also suggest you read Veritatis Splendor
Last but not least, be kind to yourself and give thanks when you choose wisely.