My wife "fell out of love" - Page 2

TheRealJuliane · #16 May 4, '12, 6:01 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by fbl9

Welcome to the forum

anti depressant meds dull the mind so there isn't much passion/drive for anything.

That is not true! If that is happening, then the person needs a medication change or an adjustment. Actually it is untreated depression that takes away passion and drive, and causes the mind to seize up like a car motor without oil. When my chronic depression is untreated (I quit my meds last time, thinking I could do without them) I cannot think straight or make decisions, I get very passive and paralyzed. When I am medicated I have hope, I have commitment, and I can accomplish tasks. Night and day, after just a few days, my brain clears up and I am alive again. I respond very quickly to medis though, I guess my brain is so hungry for the hormones that they just work fast! A lot of people have to take the meds for up to 4-6 weeks sometimes to get relief.

SurlyMermaid · #17 May 4, '12, 6:08 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

That is not true! If that is happening, then the person needs a medication change or an adjustment. Actually it is untreated depression that takes away passion and drive, and causes the mind to seize up like a car motor without oil. When my chronic depression is untreated (I quit my meds last time, thinking I could do without them) I cannot think straight or make decisions, I get very passive and paralyzed. When I am medicated I have hope, I have commitment, and I can accomplish tasks. Night and day, after just a few days, my brain clears up and I am alive again. I respond very quickly to medis though, I guess my brain is so hungry for the hormones that they just work fast! A lot of people have to take the meds for up to 4-6 weeks sometimes to get relief.

I'm with Julianne here. I've seen it firsthand. Sometimes it's hard finding the right meds/combo, for sure. I used to be very, very anti-medication. I do still believe in exhausting all options first (foods, sunlight, exercise, etc.). My father-in-law and one of my best friends, two of THE MOST together, sensible, warm, loving folks I know are on psychotropics.

Certainly gave me a different perspective.

fbl9 · #18 May 4, '12, 9:35 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

That is not true! .

Quote:

Originally Posted by SurlyMermaid

I'm with Julianne here. I've seen it firsthand. .

Well that seems to be my experience with my wife taking exflexor(sic?).The dulling that is.

TheRealJuliane · #19 May 4, '12, 4:20 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by fbl9

Well that seems to be my experience with my wife taking exflexor(sic?).The dulling that is.

Then she should tell her psychiatrist about that. It could be that Effexor is not the right medication for her. She should not stop taking it without being weaned off of it, though. Some of the newer anti-depressants can cause nasty withdrawal symptoms unless you wean away from them slowly as you ramp up another medication.

Please tell your wife not to settle for just survival. There is a better way, than living but not enjoying life.

faithfully · #20 May 4, '12, 7:27 pm

Actually, Anti-depressents can have some serious side effects

Here's just one article: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/medi..._depression.ht

I think it's also worth noting, although generally only a problem in teens and young adults, some anti-depressents can actually cause suicidal tendancies in people.

They are not a fix all for everyone. And should be taken under close supervision.

For example, with effexor, the suicide warning is listed at the TOP of their webpage.

I'd check the common side effects for any drug and see if they are presentin. Sexual issues seem to be listed. Seemingly, lack of desire. I can see how some people who might correlate desire and love for another may be having major issues.

Just a thought!

crazzeto · #21 May 4, '12, 7:32 pm

All I can really say is I will pray for you. I'm so sorry you are having the difficulties you are having. Marital problems are always difficult, so much more so when it seemsl like there is no solution.

None of us can know what the future holds, but cling to your faith in Christ, and even your faith in your spouse. Be honest and be there as much as you can.

fbl9 · #22 May 4, '12, 8:22 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

Then she should tell her psychiatrist about that. It could be that Effexor is not the right medication for her. She should not stop taking it without being weaned off of it, though. Some of the newer anti-depressants can cause nasty withdrawal symptoms unless you wean away from them slowly as you ramp up another medication.

Please tell your wife not to settle for just survival. There is a better way, than living but not enjoying life.

Tried but she is content with what she has. Yeah i know all about what happens when one stops/ run out of this drug.