Job..family...thoughts - Page 2

PJM · #16 May 8, '12, 4:50 pm

Quote:

=scc11;9269233]All,
I recently graduated from college (in Dec 2011) with by BA in Criminology. For a long time I wanted to work with troubled youth. I prayed and prayed and finally God answered my prayers in February. I got a job a juvenile detention center approximately an hour away. At first the drive didn't bother and I did my best to ignore the other staff's comments about management, the way things are run, etc. However I am starting to see for myself how things are done and the drive is starting to get to me. APART from all of that, I do not think I have the personality for this job. In order to do this job you have to be able to tell a group of 23 15-16 year old boys to sit down and be quiet. Seems simple enough right? Not so much. They call you names, make sexually suggestive comments etc. I always said I wasn't going to let this stuff bother me but I am human and I am normally a quiet a reserved person. I do not see myself doing well in this job. I recently completed training which means in the next few days I could be left alone on the mod with these kids and though I am not scared of them, I feel I do not have the personality to deal with them.
Overall I am writing this because I am not sure what to do. I feel God answered my prayer for a job in my field and now I am considering leaving it and going back to previous job.

I feel like I'm betraying God.

UNREST is the first and most common indicator that your not where God wants you to be? But don't be rash; maybe talk to your priest and listen closely to the advice he shares.

TRY to spend some time before the Blessed Sacrament on a frequent basis.

God First

Family second
Job THIRD
then everything else

I'll pray for you too.

God Bless,
pat/PJM

littlenothing · #17 May 8, '12, 7:08 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deo Gratias42

I'm in the same boat as you. My rosary is starting to get wear marks on the beads, and I keep holy water in my desk to help me when things get really tough. Sometimes I wonder if sprinkling my clientele with holy water will make them stop re-offending, it at least for a month so I can get caught up on paperwork. Meanwhile I have prison ministry members on my case because I think some people do belong in jail rather than out in the community.

I agree that some people just belong in jail. Re reading that made me think this: could it be that part of the problem is personnel? Medical and social work fields are very prone to harboring toxic work environments. That creates unease and can lead to further confusion about the job itself. Confusion and unease are indeed in the devil's playbook, and it is hard to sort out from whence it has come.

scc11 · #18 May 12, '12, 3:39 pm

All, thanks for the advice. I have decided to do whats best for me and that is to leave the detention center. For a long time I wanted to help kids but I just dont have the personality for it. Also on Tuesday something happened at work that I just cant shake....a kid tried to commit suicide. I walked in and he had a tshirt tied around his neck and his eyes were rolling back into his head. It was scary. Its all I can think about. I dont know what to. When it happened, I followed our centers operating procedure by calling the proper code over the radio and I went in and took the t shirt off. I checked his breathing and pulse. He ended up being ok and talked to someone in mental health. For some reason I keep having flashbacks to that moments. Any advice?

littlenothing · #19 May 12, '12, 5:57 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by scc11

All, thanks for the advice. I have decided to do whats best for me and that is to leave the detention center. For a long time I wanted to help kids but I just dont have the personality for it. Also on Tuesday something happened at work that I just cant shake....a kid tried to commit suicide. I walked in and he had a tshirt tied around his neck and his eyes were rolling back into his head. It was scary. Its all I can think about. I dont know what to. When it happened, I followed our centers operating procedure by calling the proper code over the radio and I went in and took the t shirt off. I checked his breathing and pulse. He ended up being ok and talked to someone in mental health. For some reason I keep having flashbacks to that moments. Any advice?

Debrief. Talk to a psychologist. A similar thing happened where I worked, but, thank goodness I wasn't there at the time. One of the psychologists offered all who were there a "mental health check-up" and debriefing after the incident, and as long as they needed it. The other patients were also given support. You have got to do this. Do not let it paralyze you. Don't let it get under your skin. Maybe you were supposed to be there only until now. Could it be that you are supposed to pray for people in danger of suicide?

Also talk to a priest. Many people will blame themselves, even if there was nothing they could possibly have done. You did what you could. The kid is safe. Carry no guilt for this.

TheRealJuliane · #20 May 12, '12, 6:09 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by scc11

All, thanks for the advice. I have decided to do whats best for me and that is to leave the detention center. For a long time I wanted to help kids but I just dont have the personality for it. Also on Tuesday something happened at work that I just cant shake....a kid tried to commit suicide. I walked in and he had a tshirt tied around his neck and his eyes were rolling back into his head. It was scary. Its all I can think about. I dont know what to. When it happened, I followed our centers operating procedure by calling the proper code over the radio and I went in and took the t shirt off. I checked his breathing and pulse. He ended up being ok and talked to someone in mental health. For some reason I keep having flashbacks to that moments. Any advice?

I agree with the previous poster. Tell your supervisor that you need to talk to a psychologist. They will have a procedure set up for this. You need to do this before you quit, or you could end up with some level of PTSD, and no benefits to get help.

Yes, see your priest. You have no culpability in this situation.

Talk to your supervisor anyway, there might be some other job you can apply for, where you can use your talents/education and not be traumatized. I don't think you're on the wrong path, just maybe on a side track of that path.

Tenebrae · #21 May 13, '12, 3:52 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by scc11

All, thanks for the advice. I have decided to do whats best for me and that is to leave the detention center. For a long time I wanted to help kids but I just dont have the personality for it. Also on Tuesday something happened at work that I just cant shake....a kid tried to commit suicide. I walked in and he had a tshirt tied around his neck and his eyes were rolling back into his head. It was scary. Its all I can think about. I dont know what to. When it happened, I followed our centers operating procedure by calling the proper code over the radio and I went in and took the t shirt off. I checked his breathing and pulse. He ended up being ok and talked to someone in mental health. For some reason I keep having flashbacks to that moments. Any advice?

You know what? This is probably why God allowed you to have this job--just for that moment when you were able to save that boy.