Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, 10 secrets...

Ron_in_minden · #1 Jul 30, '12, 8:32 pm

Hello, has anyone out there read this book by Dr. Meg Meeker, and if so would you consider it a book useful for fathers of young girls only. My daughter is 21 and sometimes I just don't know anymore. Basically I was hoping this book would help me be a better father and try to reconnect with her. But if it's just for younger girls I won't waste my money. Thanks.

white sheep · #2 Jul 30, '12, 8:38 pm

I think it's pretty well over by the time they turn 13. Once they are 18 there ain't much more fixing you're going to get done. Attempting to do so often leads to alienation.

cdaters · #3 Jul 31, '12, 11:55 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by white sheep

I think it's pretty well over by the time they turn 13. Once they are 18 there ain't much more fixing you're going to get done. Attempting to do so often leads to alienation.

I can relate to the alienation aspect. This happened to me in a major way.

white sheep · #4 Jul 31, '12, 1:08 pm

I've seen many teenagers whose parents pushed too hard. Once they're 13 or 14 you better lighten up and trust in the groundwork you laid when they were younger. Any attempt at "parenting" when they are older than that, especially over 18, tends to do nothing more than drive them away. I mention this because it sounded to me like that is exactly what this person was wanting to do. You don't get to go back and re-parent your 21 year old. All you can do is keep them in your life, and that won't happen if you are telling them what they should and shouldn't be doing all the time. There is still a time and place for giving advice to older kids, but you have to be more mindful.