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  #1  
Old Jun 12, '12, 3:33 am
bscastro bscastro is offline
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Join Date: February 28, 2006
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Religion: Catholic
Default For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Dear friends,

I could use your prayers. My wife confronted me about my "obsessive" Catholicism and we had a 4 hour talk (1 am in the morning) about God, religion, and such. Basically, she's an agnostic and I "could be right" but she believes if you live your life in accordance to the natural law and "love your neighbor" you don't have to have a relationship with God. That's the short of it, and perhaps unnecessary background, but there it is.

In any case, I love my wife, but she sees my faith as a growing wedge in our marriage.

I pray for strength, patience, and trust in the Lord and his plan for me and my wife.

Your prayers are needed and appreciated.

God bless and thank you,
Bryan
__________________
The Lord is kind and merciful.

I believe one of God's most under-appreciated gifts to us is the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
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  #2  
Old Jun 12, '12, 6:27 am
aicirt aicirt is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bscastro View Post
Dear friends,

I could use your prayers. My wife confronted me about my "obsessive" Catholicism and we had a 4 hour talk (1 am in the morning) about God, religion, and such. Basically, she's an agnostic and I "could be right" but she believes if you live your life in accordance to the natural law and "love your neighbor" you don't have to have a relationship with God. That's the short of it, and perhaps unnecessary background, but there it is.

In any case, I love my wife, but she sees my faith as a growing wedge in our marriage.

I pray for strength, patience, and trust in the Lord and his plan for me and my wife.

Your prayers are needed and appreciated.

God bless and thank you,
Bryan
You have my prayers.

Curious: How long have you been married, and what does she cite as your "obsessive" Catholicism?
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  #3  
Old Jun 12, '12, 6:55 am
bscastro bscastro is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Quote:
Originally Posted by aicirt View Post
You have my prayers.

Curious: How long have you been married, and what does she cite as your "obsessive" Catholicism?
Well, I'll try to be concise. We're going on 10 years of marriage this year. When we were married, I was a "lazy" Catholic. Maybe about 7 years ago, I had a big conversion/reversion and started being more devout. This year, I upped the efforts in terms of going to Mass daily, more prayer, basically trying to put God first in my life.

She thinks it's dominated my thinking, which she's partly correct. However, I have taken great efforts in making sure that it didn't "interfere" with my life within our family - e.g. I went to Mass during my work lunch hours, I pray early in the morning before kids get up, I do my spiritual reading when she's watching TV.

Also, I think my faith has made me a better husband/father - I do more around the house, I look to my wife's needs before my own, etc. Not saying to be boastful, but more trying to illustrate that my faith has only strengthened and improved me as a father and husband (as it naturally should).

In any case, there's a lot more to it, but I just had a 50 minute conversation about it with a friend so I'm a little tired out discussing the situation. Thank you for your prayers.

In Christ,
Bryan
__________________
The Lord is kind and merciful.

I believe one of God's most under-appreciated gifts to us is the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
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  #4  
Old Jun 12, '12, 7:11 am
Gods_Peace's Avatar
Gods_Peace Gods_Peace is offline
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Arrow Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

You need to pray for her conversion in the mornings, and in the evening when you have your spare time. Make sure you address the prayer to the holy spirit, asking Yhwh to convert your wife.
+I hope all goes well+

+God Bless+
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  #5  
Old Jun 12, '12, 8:22 am
MS_SURVEYOR MS_SURVEYOR is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of death.

Amen
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  #6  
Old Jun 12, '12, 8:45 am
JohnAlexander JohnAlexander is offline
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Join Date: March 29, 2010
Posts: 167
Religion: Catholic
Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Since you are most likely the Catholic your wife knows best it is how you behave that will determine her idea of what a Catholic is. Because of this you must be the best husband you can be.

Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church. Remember that of the first Church members one betrayed him and most of the others ran away when he needed them most. So what do you do if your wife runs away or betrays you? I don't know, but I know that you don't get rid of her and get a new wife as most people seem to do. Jesus did not dump the original Church and start a new one (sorry Mormons)

Atheists and agnostics are very put off by religiosity. By that I mean religious acts which don't have an obvious connection to behavior. Going to Mass if done properly will make you a better person. But the connection between the two is not obvious. The same for prayer. If you are not a religious person you will only see empty actions and empty words. A waste of time and energy.

I do not know why some people are religious and others are not. I have always been concerned with issues like God, life, death, why are we here, what is the point of life, how should you behave, what is virtue, etc. Some people just don't care about those things. It is totally irrational to not be concerned with such things. If you take those things away all you are left with is survival, just like all the other plants & animals on earth. What do they lack that humans have? Rationality. Without God the concept of rationality makes no sense.

Going to Mass is easy. Praying is easy. Loving your enemy is hard. Dying for someone is hard. Suppressing your anger is hard. Forgiving those who wrong you is hard. Being joyful in the face of suffering is hard. These things are made possible because of the Mass and because of prayer.

I have found that people who are anti religion tend to have a problem with some sin. Homosexuals are an obvious example, as well as divorced & remarried people. Sin blocks our relationship with God. The more you sin the less you can see God or even be aware of His presence.

Your wife might be in the grips of some sin that she does not admit to. 50 Shades of Gray seems to be selling extremely well. Birth control is another issue.

Four hour conversations between spouses are very rarely about what they are on the surface. You might be talking about religion for four hours but the real issue is something else. This is especially true when it comes to women. If a man says "I'm hungry" he pretty much means that he is hungry, he will eat anything that he likes and is easily available. A woman? Who knows? Does she want to go to a fancy restaurant? Does she want you to cook her a meal (it isn't what you cook but the fact that you cook it for her is what she is interested in)

Your wife may be worried that you are judging her.

Is your wife a very rational person (i.e. a scientist?) If so then she is probably upset because she thinks religion is stupid and if you are religious that makes you stupid. She does not want to be married to a stupid person.

You need to find out what your wife's real issue is with religion and the Church in particular.

Also prayer works. I was spending time a woman who was not Catholic. I prayed for her conversion, a deep, sincere prayer. I don't think I have ever prayed like that before or since. It is not a one time prayer, but an ongoing thing. The Rosary in particular. One day I asked God for a sign if she was supposed to be my wife. The sign I wanted was that she become Catholic. The next day she told me she wanted to go to Church. She did convert and I have been paying for it ever since

I think anyone who is genuinely interested in truth will find their way to the Catholic faith (unless they have had a seriously traumatic experience with a Catholic)
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  #7  
Old Jun 12, '12, 9:17 am
Lancer Lancer is offline
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Join Date: July 19, 2004
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Some thoughts for your consideration -- my wife is a convert into the Catholic Church...we had similar problems...anxieties...kind of like we were using two different "sheets of music" in our journey of faith and marriage...to God.

First..I was advised by a priest-Chaplain (we had been combat buddies earlier in our lives before he discerned his priestly vocation) to ask/pray to God to show me how much He (God) loves my wife...seemed a somewhat oblique guidance/counsel to my discussions with him about our problems (he knows my wife very well and is one of her favorite persons)...so I did as he said...and one day a few weeks later...after a "tense discussion" session about our marriage and our faith life together...I was upset to say the least...and that is when it happened. Now we can know and can see and can even feel that God loves our loved ones...but I actually experienced it in a brief moment in time...it was so overwhelming that I thought I was going to explode in...joy and gratitude. It only happened once and I cannot reproduce that experience...so I know that it did not come from me. My best advice...pray for that for yourself.

Second...based on that experience...I was inspired to "preach" my faith and Catholicity to and for my wife...with two ingredients and without words:...(1) make whatever sacrifices were necessary to "let peace reign" in our marriage and household/family (and do so without failing to practice my faith or fulfill my responsibilities as head of our household)... (2)...constantly pray to remind myself that the Holy Spirit is the "mover and shaker" in conversions... not me. So I relied totally on the Sacrament of Penance, Holy Mass and Holy Communion...and most importantly the Blessed Mother Mary's intercession through daily Rosary...to bring me to a deeper conversion of faith in heart and mind. I got out of the way...and got on my knees.

Lastly...what is most incredible is that I learned and experienced that my wife's faith and prayer life were and are so much deeper and richer than mine...and her relationship with Our Lord Jesus is much more intimate (even before her conversion into Catholic Church)...I was...and still am, utterly astounded and embarrassed. As my priest-Chaplin friend said..."...isn't it amazing and great that God can really love and take care of two knucklehead's like us! All I could answer was: Amen!

Pax Christi
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  #8  
Old Jun 12, '12, 9:21 am
adrift adrift is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be
done, on earth as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our
trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation
but deliver us from evil. Amen


Hail Mary full of grace the Lord is with thee
blessed art thou among women and
blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus
Holy Mary mother of God pray for us
sinners now and at the hour of our death
Amen.

Glory Be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning is now ever shall be world without end Amen
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  #9  
Old Jun 12, '12, 1:13 pm
ready ready is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

I commend your wife to the Blessed Virgin Mary. And I thank the Lord that your wife is at least living according to the Natural Law. May your wife seek truth and find it in our Lord. May he make her whole and holy, and bring her one day to seek membership in the Catholic Church. Amen.
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  #10  
Old Jun 12, '12, 11:50 pm
UpUpAndAway's Avatar
UpUpAndAway UpUpAndAway is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Remembering you and your wife in my daily prayers. God bless!
__________________
Per fidem intrepidus

Just as God's will is creation and is called "the world," so his intention is the salvation of men, and it is called "the Church."
- St. Clement of Alexandria


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  #11  
Old Jun 13, '12, 11:46 am
bscastro bscastro is offline
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Default Re: For my wife's conversion and our marriage.

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

Thank you for your prayers. I know the Lord has heard them. Please continue to pray for us. I am patient and trust in the Lord.

God bless,
Bryan
__________________
The Lord is kind and merciful.

I believe one of God's most under-appreciated gifts to us is the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
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