Yelled at sister

CleansedByMercy · #1 Jul 22, '12, 10:32 am

Quickly put:
Woke up about forty minutes before Mass, woke up my sister and informed her we were heading to Mass, showered and readied myself, went to get her and raised my voice about her changing into something that covered her shoulders (dress, bordering on too short, straps around shoulders) and that it was embarrassing to be seen with her dressed in such a fashion for Mass. I told her I would not sit with her dressed as such but she said she had nothing else to wear. I was tired and did not think about what I was saying but was just very disappointed and upset by the attire (deeper issue obviously is at hand here). We went to Mass together, sat together, I apologized to her during the Offertory song. My family does not take things such as yelling, etc. too seriously and so no one was really offended or hurt. She was not upset with me and I was not upset with her... I served at Mass and we both received Communion.

Sin?

JD27076 · #2 Jul 22, '12, 10:38 am

No Mortal sin.

Though you should confess it next time in confession.

garn9173 · #3 Jul 22, '12, 10:43 am

IMO, it's not your place to be a critic of your sister's fashion. If your parents were okay with what she was wearing, you should have let the issue go.

CleansedByMercy · #4 Jul 22, '12, 10:50 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by garn9173

IMO, it's not your place to be a critic of your sister's fashion. If your parents were okay with what she was wearing, you should have let the issue go.

I took her to Mass... No parents present. No parents saw her but her Mass attire has been problematic right before Mass for awhile now. I am only home for a bit as I live and study elsewhere...

CleansedByMercy · #5 Jul 22, '12, 10:53 am

She is not very religious and it is disheartening to see how caught up in the material and secular world she is... I have tried to lead by example, preach without words, etcetera, but I have been losing my patience. It is sometimes questionable as to whether anyone in my family will be going to Mass except for me. My family does not know about things such as fasting before Mass... I try to show that I am doing these things outrightly so they will ask me why and so I can explain without correcting or admonishing them (especially my parents).... And my anxieties have been riding a roller coaster up along with back-and-forth depression...

john78 · #6 Jul 22, '12, 11:38 am

I understand how you are feeling about your sister, and the yelling episode right before going to mass, how it can throw your entire day off, how it makes being at mass uncomfortable knowing you just yelled at a family member and wondering how they are feeling now because of it.

keep this in mind when your sister is getting ready, that one she is a female, she wants to look pretty like any other female on the planet, and there is an obvious difference in clothing that is beyond revealing and clothing that is just cut a certain way because it is designed for females.

being a brother we dont want our sisters being oogled by anyone anywhere, but it is gona happen so what can ya do about it ,,, arguing about what she wears is only going to upset her, because either she has a limited woredrobe or whatever..

all you can do is be there to support your sister the best you can, and at best politely suggest that she looks so much prettier in another outfit.

plus consider this, having these arguements before mass can inadverntly affect your sister to not wanting to go to mass ever again, because all she will remember is the fighting before mass, and instead of focusing on prayer and God in mass, now she is sitting there with hurt feelings. So why would she want to rehash those memories later in life and thus drifts from the church, then you are gona come back with a new thread ( my sister no longer goes to church ).

whether or not it is a sin is debateable,

fights are gona happen between siblings over everything under the sun, most ya can do is let her know it wont be the last arguement / fight over nonsense, and that either way you will always be there for her and love her.

Gorillaman · #7 Jul 22, '12, 11:58 am

Loved reading this post

...

Only thing I say is that it isthose that don't want to dress nice for mass, those that don't "see what the big deal is"...those are the young men and women we Need ...but I can see exactly what you're talkin about

You're doing good in my opinion!

Paz y respeto