Getting your spouse in Heaven

RedDuke50 · #1 Jul 10, '12, 8:54 pm

Someone told me that if their spouse is a devout Catholic and dies and goes to Heaven, then when their undevout Catholic spouse dies, insted of going to Hell they go to Heaven because of their spouse's piety.

So it is like saying "My wife is devout and I don't practice anymore but I am still going to Heaven because my wife is going there."

I didn't think this was right. I thought that it would just mean that your spouse will assist you on Earth to get to Heaven but if you stayed lapsed (or not in the state of grace) then you would still go to Hell. Was I right or wrong?

Thanks

underacloud · #2 Jul 10, '12, 9:24 pm

The petitions of the deceased in heaven to God may certainly help those still on earth, or in purgatory, so it is certainly possible that spouses can help each other get to heaven, whether in this life or in the next.

But, ultimately, there are no guarantees. Each person retains the freedom to accept or reject God. As sad as this may be, even our much-loved spouses may choose to reject God and be separated from us forever. We hope and pray earnestly to our merciful God that He will grant our spouses eternal life with Him, and for us too.

I always think to myself - I love my wife and children so much, how could God possibly not take them to heaven? But I can't play God; I can't assume His mercy in place of their free will. I pray for them and entrust them to His care, and play my role here as best I can.

Contra Mundum · #3 Jul 10, '12, 10:34 pm

As I understand that means helping your spouse grow in faith and holiness, and so get to Heaven.

ConstantineTG · #4 Jul 10, '12, 10:36 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedDuke50

Someone told me that if their spouse is a devout Catholic and dies and goes to Heaven, then when their undevout Catholic spouse dies, insted of going to Hell they go to Heaven because of their spouse's piety.

So it is like saying "My wife is devout and I don't practice anymore but I am still going to Heaven because my wife is going there."

I didn't think this was right. I thought that it would just mean that your spouse will assist you on Earth to get to Heaven but if you stayed lapsed (or not in the state of grace) then you would still go to Hell. Was I right or wrong?

Thanks

But how are we sure one is going to heaven?

**po18guy** · #5 Jul 10, '12, 10:54 pm

Sounds like a private interpretation of 1 Corinthians 7.

1 Corinthians 7:12-14
Douay-Rheims 1899 American Edition (DRA)
12 For to the rest I speak, not the Lord. If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she consent to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
13 And if any woman hath a husband that believeth not, and he consent to dwell with her, let her not put away her husband.
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife; and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the believing husband: otherwise your children should be unclean; but now they are holy.

But you know what Peter has to say about private interpretation...

EasterJoy · #6 Jul 10, '12, 11:09 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedDuke50

Someone told me that if their spouse is a devout Catholic and dies and goes to Heaven, then when their undevout Catholic spouse dies, insted of going to Hell they go to Heaven because of their spouse's piety.

So it is like saying "My wife is devout and I don't practice anymore but I am still going to Heaven because my wife is going there."

I didn't think this was right. I thought that it would just mean that your spouse will assist you on Earth to get to Heaven but if you stayed lapsed (or not in the state of grace) then you would still go to Hell. Was I right or wrong?

Thanks

The spouse lacking devotion could go to Heaven; the Good Thief went to Heaven. Still, whether any particular person reaches eternal life or not depends on the relationship between that person and God. We each face the Throne of Heaven directly, with our own faces. A person not fit for eternal life won't sneak in under someone else's robe.

The truth is, the spouse of a saint might be held to a higher standard than the spouse of a shrew or a cretin, because the former had far greater chances to avail themselves of grace. We can't know that, and we don't need to. Except to repeat St. Paul's council--"beloved, obedient as you have always been, not only when I am present but all the more now when I am absent, work out your salvation with fear and trembling. For God is the one who, for his good purpose, works in you both to desire and to work." (Phil. 2:12-13)--more conjecture than that is above our pay grade.

We ought to do our best, encourage one another, and pray for our beloved dead.

**Trishie** · #7 Jul 10, '12, 11:18 pm

We do need to keep in mind Jesus' spoken criteria for judging souls, of practical kindness to others, which He also accepts as being charity to Him.
Matthew 25, verses 31: 46 http://www.veritasbible.com/newjerus...ead/Matthew_25
We can't just depend on a "get-out-of jail-card" for someone else without regard for their personal choices.

**1ke** · #8 Jul 11, '12, 4:46 am

Whoever said that is confusing sanctification and salvation. Two different things.

You carry your own hide to the pearly gates, and if you die in unrepentent mortal sin you will not be enjoying the Beatific Vision no matter who else is.

stanczyk · #9 Jul 11, '12, 5:44 am

The Church prays that no one should be lost: ‘Lord, let me never be parted from you.’ If it is true that no one can save himself, it is also true that God ‘desires all men to be saved’ (1 Tim 2:4), and that for him ‘all things are possible’ (Mt 19:26).

RedDuke50 · #10 Jul 11, '12, 2:31 pm

Thanks for the replies.

Luvz2travel · #11 Jul 13, '12, 12:13 pm

Everyone is responsible for their own soul. A spouse can be a saint but if their significant other is a Hitler or just an evil person that person will have to pay for their own behavior / actions on the day of Judgement. We can pray and try to influence a spouse but in the end God gave them free will and it's up to them to seek redemption.