Qualifications for a Priest's Wife

[ConstantineTG]

Originally Posted by 5Loaves

I'm aware that some jusirdictions choose to ignore the canon the does not allow a subdeacon to marry. It is actually written into the canons of the UGCC that subdeacons are allowed to marry?

I heard from a friend that the Melkites allow subdeacons to marry, but not Ukrainians. I'm surprised to hear here that the UGCC allows subdeacons to marry. Perhaps the information I was given earlier is not correct.

[Diak]

Subdeacons are still minor clergy. Canonical limitations on marital state only apply to major clergy. Subdeacons can marry after ordination.

I'm aware that some jusirdictions choose to ignore the canon the does not allow a subdeacon to marry. It is actually written into the canons of the UGCC that subdeacons are allowed to marry?

Regarding the Canon, I would have to do some research on subsequent praxis and declarations, as this is the case even amongst many Orthodox that the subdeacon can marry after ordination. I think canonically the distinction arose when the Latin Church maintained the idea that the subdiaconate was a major order, which would require a fixation of the marital state, while the East maintained the subdiaconate as a minor order, which was freer in this regard.

[Diak]

You bring up a good point - it is very important to differentiate between disciplinary canons as opposed to dogmatic canons. Disciplinary canons are mutable and subject to hierarchal economia and later clarifications based on praxis as well as circumstances of time and place; dogma, of course, is immutable.

[dochawk]

Originally Posted by triumphguy

First you need to marry a priest......

nah,that's second.

First, yah gots to be a girl . . .



And in a more serious vin . . .

I believe the ukranian dare in the minorityinimposingclibacy at major orders, rather than the subdiaconate. There are also oriental churches which ordain to the subdiaconate vey young for priest's children, and do not impose celibacy.

in the east, the lay altar servers (such as myself) are filling for subdeacons--there really aren't supposed tobe any non-clergy in the tHoly Place . . .

And finally, going back to the original question . . . Especially inthe context of questions like this, it's important to realize that the Code of canon law for the eastn churches should not exist; these churches should be following the ancient canons, not a code. this is a serious issue with the orthodox (and rightly so but that's an issue for another thread)

hawk

[ByzCathCantor]

Originally Posted by dochawk

And finally, going back to the original question . . . Especially inthe context of questions like this, it's important to realize that the Code of canon law for the eastn churches should not exist; these churches should be following the ancient canons, not a code. this is a serious issue with the orthodox (and rightly so but that's an issue for another thread)

A very good point, not at all out of context here, but indeed worthy of another thread at some point.

[ByzCathCantor]

More directly to the OP, a priest's wife must be willing to also make sacrifices for the good of a parish family, as well as her own.

A rarity for it's time, I actually grew up in a parish with a married priest and family. The priest's wife, who we called Pani (title of respect by custom), played a very central role in the life of the parish. She was also expected to have a secular job in order to help support the family financially. As challenging as all this was - mother to three children, leader in parish life and career woman (she worked in the financial services industry) - she exuded love and dedication at all times. It does take a special woman ...

Also, many of the wives of priests in earlier times came from other religious families, often daughters of priests themselves who understood the role through their own experience and witness in their own families.

[Diak]

She has to be ready to support her husband and share in her own way in the unique place of "pani matka" (or "pani dobrodivka" in some places) in the parish. That even goes for the deacon's wife to a certain degree. But she also is instrumental in taking on tasks like the catechesis of the younger children, music if she is so inclined, etc. There is also the very special place of "pani dobrodivka" with the women of the parish (my wife can speak volumes about this aspect) as outside of confession sometimes the women tend to confide in the priest or deacon's wife about certain female things.

There is sacrificing that must be done as the ministerial needs of the parish will require time and effort from the father - sick calls, funerals, catechesis, parish meetings, etc. So the discernment for ordination has to involve both, and in the UGCC for diaconate and priesthood a separate letter of consent of the wife is required. When I had my formal interview with my ordaining bishop at the beginning of my formation, he had my wife come and talk to him separately without me in the room.

[5Loaves]

Originally Posted by Diak

She has to be ready to support her husband and share in her own way in the unique place of "pani matka" (or "pani dobrodivka" in some places) in the parish. That even goes for the deacon's wife to a certain degree. But she also is instrumental in taking on tasks like the catechesis of the younger children, music if she is so inclined, etc. There is also the very special place of "pani dobrodivka" with the women of the parish (my wife can speak volumes about this aspect) as outside of confession sometimes the women tend to confide in the priest or deacon's wife about certain female things.

There is sacrificing that must be done as the ministerial needs of the parish will require time and effort from the father - sick calls, funerals, catechesis, parish meetings, etc. So the discernment for ordination has to involve both, and in the UGCC for diaconate and priesthood a separate letter of consent of the wife is required. When I had my formal interview with my ordaining bishop at the beginning of my formation, he had my wife come and talk to him separately without me in the room.

Fr. Loya (Light of the East Radio) has talked maybe annually about married priests, and he specifically talks about the problem here in America where we have a break in the tradition of married clergy because we don't have girls who have grown up in priestly families now. It is often the case that priests' wives come from priestly families so they are quite familiar with the family life of a priest. Even when you have married clergy coming in from Protestant traditions those are usually also coming from traditions where they've been around clergy wives and know they kind of demands that are put on the wife of a pastor.

There are also some interesting pieces on the Good Guys Wear Black website in the Clergy Wives section.

[Diak]

We're very fortunate that my kids grew up with married clergy almost entirely over the last 20+ years in the UGCC parishes we attended, easily 3/4 of the parish clergy over that time.