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  #31  
Old Feb 2, '10, 1:39 pm
trebor5779 trebor5779 is offline
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Default Wounded and Disfunctional

I posted earlier to the CRHP forum and distraaught that no one has bothered to respond to my thoughts.

I think that this speaks volumes - I have left my parish because I think CRHP left me wounded and disfunctional and no one comments or offers advice.

This just leaves me feeling that CRHP is a social click. There needs to be some screening with the priests or other about what you are going to do when you open that black box. You cannot put the Genie back in the bottle, and if CRHP does not help people address or understand what is in your personal black box - then untold damage is being done.

No CRHP is not for everyone -
  #32  
Old Feb 21, '10, 8:51 pm
Isadore Isadore is offline
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Default Re: chrp (christ renews his parish

I just got home from a CHRP retreat a few hours ago. It was OK, I got a few good things from it and met some good people. However, it was far too "Oprah confessional/corporate trust building" exercise-ish for me. I lost a weekend that I could have spent with wife & sons, that I will never get back. A more traditional type retreat would have been much more beneficial to me.
Trebor, I see that much damage could be done quite easily. Too easily for me to recommend it to others. It's a bit like riding a motorcycle at high speeds, it could be exhilarating and at the same time very deadly. I am sorry for you, and will pray that your situation will be remedied.
  #33  
Old Feb 22, '10, 6:53 am
bizbachfan bizbachfan is offline
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Default Re: chrp (christ renews his parish

CRHP like parishes, are run by people, and lay people usually at that. So there will be different results depending on who is the lay director, the spirtual director etc.

I would say if you need to know all the details before you go you probably are not in a place in your life where you are ready or open to a CRHP weekend or maybe you just don't need it. (nothing negative, its just not for everyone)

If you want a traditional retreat, go to one, not CRHP. If you are looking for "club" type organization, this is not it.

I have been involved with CRHP by attending one and giving two. I know that personality, politics etc can come into play. I just let it go and pray a little harder for a good outcome and its worked.

Yes you should stick to the program as much as possible, too much ad lib and the whole thing will fall apart.
It changed my life and it was well worth it for me, but not for all.

You really do have to be called by the Holy Spirit and there should be no pressure to go or continue into formation only encouragement.
  #34  
Old Feb 22, '10, 10:15 am
bizbachfan bizbachfan is offline
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Default Re: chrp (christ renews his parish

Quote:
Originally Posted by kcouch View Post
I have been an active Catholic for over 20 years and love everything about the Church. I was actually disappointed with my recent CHRP experience because it felt to me like it was some charasmatic revival thing, where I was supposed to surrender to emotions (after someone's "witness") rather than the Holy Spirit.The only aspects that I felt God was during the Sacraments. And yes, I went into it completely open to God and ready for a renewal, but instead was left wondering if our Priest knew what was going on during the times he wasn't present. AM I THE ONLY ONE????
I can see CRHP being a disappointment to someone who was not in "need' of it so to speak. It also really depends on who is on the team that gives it to you and where they are spiritually, etc. I have seen people with great spiritual lives and very active in their faith come into the process and really enjoy it even though they didn't have a great need for it, but others who really were not touched by it.

In the end its more about becoming more involved with your parish and connecting to other people and of course getting closer to Christ. If you are already connected, spiritual, etc the formation process would probably be more beneficial to you.

Its certainly not a fit for everyone. There is an emotional aspect that cannot be ignored, but usually that leads to an opening to let the Holy Spirit in closer, but again not for everyone.
  #35  
Old Feb 23, '10, 9:55 am
danonwaveland danonwaveland is offline
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Default Re: chrp (christ renews his parish

Quote:
Originally Posted by bizbachfan View Post
CRHP like parishes, are run by people, and lay people usually at that. So there will be different results depending on who is the lay director, the spirtual director etc.

I would say if you need to know all the details before you go you probably are not in a place in your life where you are ready or open to a CRHP weekend or maybe you just don't need it. (nothing negative, its just not for everyone)

If you want a traditional retreat, go to one, not CRHP. If you are looking for "club" type organization, this is not it.

I have been involved with CRHP by attending one and giving two. I know that personality, politics etc can come into play. I just let it go and pray a little harder for a good outcome and its worked.

Yes you should stick to the program as much as possible, too much ad lib and the whole thing will fall apart.
It changed my life and it was well worth it for me, but not for all.

You really do have to be called by the Holy Spirit and there should be no pressure to go or continue into formation only encouragement.
Well said.

God bless,
Dan
  #36  
Old Mar 10, '10, 11:48 am
Bussi Bussi is offline
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Default Re: CHRHP Wasn't All That

Quote:
Originally Posted by clydesdale View Post
I attended a CHRHP in another diocese years ago and thought I was going to hear from the early Chiurch fathers, study the Catechism up close and personal, and in short, have a great weekend of reflection and excitement in which I would be truly engaged with my faith. As it turned out, it was nothing more than basic introductory Catholicism - and I mean warmed-over grade school level Catholicism - featuring a bunch of guys who stood up one by one and cried at some point and hugged each other. Even the priest apologized to me for such a disappointing experience at the end of the weekend, but he gave me some great direction. Keep your mind open, he said, and the Holy Spirit will guide you.

Again, that was long, long ago in a diocese far, far away. I am glad to hear some of you are experiencing great graces as a result of attending CHRHP. The lesson I learned was, O.K., CHRHP wasn't for me. But I kept looking and found my own personal apostolate in the Knights of Columbus. Now that's an organization where we DO real work FOR the parish and there are plenty of opportunities to volunteer to help out in many capacities. Prayerful, loyal to the Magisterium and actively involved in all kinds of programs geared directly and specifically toward parish renewal, there's a lot more than talking, crying and hugging going on in the K.C.'s...Not that there's anything wrong with those 3 things as they all have their time and place.

Bottom line? Maybe CHRHP has improved over the years and I should give it another try.

Ave Maria,

Clydesdale
Clydesdale,

I do not mean no offend by what I am about to say.........These are my own personal observations and perspectives.

It seems obvious to me that you were at a different level of and faith than a lot of men who attend the CRHP retreat. I was much like you were except that I had no expectations as to what would happen on the weekend. Many are not at that level and they are the ones who need the "boost" and encouragement that can come through the
weekend. For example, of my CRHP brothers has experienced a complete turnaround in his life, going from an almost indifference to the Church to being an evangelist within his own family to being discerned as the lay director for our next weekend. He has been a great inspiration to me and all of my CHRP brothers and sisters to to be privileged to watch the transformation that he has undergone in about one year's time, and, experience the joy that comes with the knowledge that my contributions however small had something to do with it. We can only be Jesus' instruments when we simply step out in faith and let Him speak through us as we are witnesses to what He has done in our lives.

God bless........

Bussi
  #37  
Old Mar 10, '10, 3:18 pm
Bussi Bussi is offline
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Default Re: chrp (christ renews his parish

Quote:
Originally Posted by trebor5779 View Post
CRHP can be a good and bad experience.

I had both - I enjoyed the people I met.

However, you must be prepared for the self examination - my wife and I both did crhp and I was not ready for the wounds it opened.

I found during this process that the assumptions in our relationship that I had used to make decisions were based on lies and deception. This would have been ok except for how these decisions lead me sacrifices that made me fundamentally unhappy. I could live with these decisions until I found them to be based on lies. Now, they fill me with anger and rage.

CRHP destroyed my family and marriage. Although it did what it was supposed to do - make you understand the past and how it effects today.

There should be some screening process to ensure that the wounds that are opened are wounds that can be healed. Otherwise, I feel CRHP has left me wounded and disfunctional.


Trebor,

I cannot even begin to understand the emotional wringer you have gone through whether it was your life or CRHP or a combination of both. The primary thrust of CRHP is to awaken men and women to the glories of our faith and to the fact that Christ wants to renew one's parish in it's entirety. We all have things that happen in our lives that we suppress that are so painful for us to remember, but Jesus Christ is our Supreme Healer and wants to heal us spiritually, emotionally, and even physically. It is by His Grace that he accomplishes these as I can attest to them myself.

There is a song with these word: Cast your eyes upon Jesus, look full on his wonderful face, and the things of this world grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.

There are many situations I have found myself in where I can only conclude that God brought me there, There were things good and bad (of my own doing) I would never be able to resolve without His intervention in my life to either rescue me or teach valuable lessons. I can only conclude that He arranged a 10,000 round trip ("planes, trains.and automobiles") because of the circumstances surrounding it. To keep it short let me just say that in response to three years of storming heaven, I found myself on a trip that brought me to Lourdes, France where I He enabled me to see the love He has for His people (including me) and the Love his people have for Him. I was in dire need of both spiritual and emotional healing and I got them both even though I cannot claim they were miraculous. (There have only been 65 or so authenticated miracles associated with Lourdes since out of about 2000 of 30,000 claimed , there was enough information available to even warrant considering an investigation). My own take on what happened to me is that this was just one of the ways God intervenes in our lives. Admittedly this was somewhat out of the ordinary but I believe He tailors the intervention as necessary to achieve His will for us. I must admit I have given Him not a little resistance in my life because I have been sort of a hard nut to crack so He has "boiled me like the frog,by degrees"over 70+ years. It's just so many times we all fail to see these events for what they are in our lives and ask ourselves, "where did that come from?" So many times it has been the Lord Himself but also using people as instruments to accomplish His will in our lives (without interfering with our free will). I think the weekend is a "call" to walk with Jesus in his ways and the fellowship that follows is the way He will heal His Church parish by parish.

What I am trying to suggest is that no matter how you feel at the moment, I believe He stands ready to help you and heal those things in your life if you will only turn to Him and His loving care he that manifests to all of us if we seek/ask for it.

God bless....

Bussi
  #38  
Old Mar 11, '10, 8:36 am
belmontmac belmontmac is offline
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

I can sincerely say I am where I am today in my faith journey because of CRHP. I knew nothing of the weekend going in, just that I heard that it was a life changing experience. I was in a desperate need of renewal, it was the spiritual kick in the butt I needed. I wish everyone had the same experience, but we are all different and in different places. My wife ushered me over to sign up after Mass one morning, she feels it was the biggest mistake she made, she has no idea. I have heard of some negative response, probably count them on one hand. Overall the I think CRHP weekend is a very positive experience.
  #39  
Old Mar 20, '10, 9:15 am
carolstartrek carolstartrek is offline
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

I also recently attended a CRHP retreat and it's time to decide to be on the "giving" team. I am conflicted as I, upon reflection, found that the weekend was "wanting" for me. I was looking forward to some deep heart-felt conversation with other fellow women and instead focused on making poems, posters and skits that focused on the presenter. Is the format for presenting the CRHP weekend set in stone? The process of coming up with the poster etc helped to foster the group process and conversation geared to the presenter, but did little for me to inspire my faith. Plus, the details of others personal lives - we all struggle. Help!! The leader of the last CRHP is really hoping that I will be a part of the next giving team. And I am so unsure.
  #40  
Old Mar 21, '10, 10:38 am
Isadore Isadore is offline
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

I, too, was not terribly impressed with the weekend. I did attend one follow up meeting, but have decided not to participate further. I was heavily recruited, as you have been. I ultimately decided that any effort on my part would be half-hearted, so it was better for everyone if I didn't go ahead. Making posters and poems again and making others do so would be very irritating to me & would probably make a negative impact on those participating. It looks like a very self-selecting operation to me, those that don't care for it simply drop out of sight, and those that do get something out of it shout it from the rooftops to everyone willing to listen. That's just natural, I suppose. Only you can decide for yourself, but if you are not really into it that will reflect to those around you. No need to mess it up for anyone else.
That's just my two cents worth.
  #41  
Old Mar 21, '10, 9:26 pm
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

Quote:
Originally Posted by belmontmac View Post
I can sincerely say I am where I am today in my faith journey because of CRHP. I knew nothing of the weekend going in, just that I heard that it was a life changing experience. I was in a desperate need of renewal, it was the spiritual kick in the butt I needed. I wish everyone had the same experience, but we are all different and in different places. My wife ushered me over to sign up after Mass one morning, she feels it was the biggest mistake she made, she has no idea. I have heard of some negative response, probably count them on one hand. Overall the I think CRHP weekend is a very positive experience.
I'm glad it was good for you. But what does the bolded part mean? I'm curious.
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  #42  
Old Mar 21, '10, 9:46 pm
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

Quote:
Originally Posted by carolstartrek View Post
I also recently attended a CRHP retreat and it's time to decide to be on the "giving" team. I am conflicted as I, upon reflection, found that the weekend was "wanting" for me. I was looking forward to some deep heart-felt conversation with other fellow women and instead focused on making poems, posters and skits that focused on the presenter. Is the format for presenting the CRHP weekend set in stone? The process of coming up with the poster etc helped to foster the group process and conversation geared to the presenter, but did little for me to inspire my faith. Plus, the details of others personal lives - we all struggle. Help!! The leader of the last CRHP is really hoping that I will be a part of the next giving team. And I am so unsure.
While they tell you up front it's "just a weekend" it turns into 6 months of preparing the next one and then six more months of preparing the preparers for the next one. But it would be rather silly to spend time on something you aren't enthusiastic for. And they keep asking people to help at everyone after that. DW has a hard time saying "no." I really felt I lost my wife to a cult or something. After 6 months, it was nice to have her home again. It may only be one night a week, but there's prep. While the secrecy seems to be part of the alure, it seems unfair to tell people "it's only a weekend" then cajole them into 25 weeks of weekly meetings and the work that goes with it. Bait and switch tactics are outlawed in most places.

And I don't mean to belittle the program. It was a great aid to my BIL and his efforts to overcome his troubles. I just think the concept of "you need to go and it'll be great for you, but I can't tell you about it or you'll run away like a gazelle" is not what comes to mind of a good self-perpetuating program. But it does seem to work.
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  #43  
Old Mar 22, '10, 12:16 pm
Bussi Bussi is offline
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

Quote:
Originally Posted by newbetx View Post
While they tell you up front it's "just a weekend" it turns into 6 months of preparing the next one and then six more months of preparing the preparers for the next one. But it would be rather silly to spend time on something you aren't enthusiastic for. And they keep asking people to help at everyone after that. DW has a hard time saying "no." I really felt I lost my wife to a cult or something. After 6 months, it was nice to have her home again. It may only be one night a week, but there's prep. While the secrecy seems to be part of the alure, it seems unfair to tell people "it's only a weekend" then cajole them into 25 weeks of weekly meetings and the work that goes with it. Bait and switch tactics are outlawed in most places.

And I don't mean to belittle the program. It was a great aid to my BIL and his efforts to overcome his troubles. I just think the concept of "you need to go and it'll be great for you, but I can't tell you about it or you'll run away like a gazelle" is not what comes to mind of a good self-perpetuating program. But it does seem to work.
I can understand having misgivings about extended involvement/commitment after the weekend. I also think that the separate "tracks" for men and women is best because there are thinks that each neither are likely to bring up and discuss things they are uncomfortable talking about in mixed company. If "it was a great aid to BIL," then CRHP was at least a success on that level. CRHP is intended to "move " through the whole parish and this in the end will the true overall measure of the success of Christ Himself renewing his parish(s). We are really just His workers in the vineyard/harvest by our response to His call on our lives

My wife and I had just lived in our current location and had been members of our new parish for about two years and we had already joined the Senior adult ministry. at about this time I was wondering what more involvement in parish life should I engage in. Well, our parish announced that our parish was to receive a "gift"from another parish, an "outreach" CRHP weekend to "jump" start the CRHP process (to use a colloquialism).

We were not contacted in any way except for notices in our parish bulletin, my wife picked up the sign up sheets, and they laid on our kitchen table for about 5 days. The only activities that might possibly in some sense be construed as retreats are our Marriage Encounter weekend, a mini-engaged encounter weekend as the presenting couple, and state and nation Catholic charismatic conference. self hearing about how God was working in the witnesses lives. Sunday morning I just knew that this was something that I must be involved with and made the commitment to continue with the CRHP process.

I have been involved with CRHP continually for the last two years and have experienced marvelous fellowship. Being a septuagenarian, the vast majority of my CRHP brothers' ages correspond closely to the ages of my own children and grandchildren.

I have my own share of turmoil in my life and I can point to specific instance where sharing episodes and what I have learned through the years have been helpful in some of my CRHP brothers' lives. The bonding that occurs during each Team formation is not just to put on a weekend but to foster a realization and understanding that as Catholic Christian men we are truly brothers in Christ, who is our Brother, Friend , and most of all our Lord, and that this is the way Christ will renew our parishes, both men and women by our commitment to help in an ongoing CRHP process.

Having, been a veteran of 4 weekends so far am heading into the fifth, I have been in a position see the process working especially in the faith and prayer life of the men (and women) and their families, increases in involvement in parish activities and volunteer services to the parish at large.

Many years ago my wife and I came to the realization that we have a mutual obligation to help each other and to help our children get to Heaven, My wife is a professed Third order Discalced Carmelite (about 15 years now). This is the contemplative spiritually that appeals to her but not to me. I found that in the activities of CRHP I am most comfortable. I enjoy helping others discover the wonders of our Catholic faith in small group or one-on-one situations,especially in the size of group preparing for the next weekend. My background is basically hard science and some engineering, no formal training ac a teacher,but I suppose that what I do can be construed as sort of teaching but I prefer to look at is sharing life experiences and whatever knowledge, especially of the faith, I may have accumulated over the years.

The CRHP weekend is a very tightly packed/organized weekend in our to cover all the ground that it does, and, of necessity there is little time for the back and forth interaction that a venue like these CAF threads, thus it must be deferred to the weekly post-weekend meetings where those discussions are to my mind handled better. To me the weekend is sort of an "appetizer," the weekly meetings are the venue for more intense interaction and fellowship and is the "main course," so to speak.

To me it is similar to what happens in a marriage, the more each spouse puts into the marriage, the more each gets, especially if it is 100% on the part of both. Both I and my wife have always realized this in our 50+ years of married life. CRHP is sort of similar, there is so much to gain if you are willing to put much into it.

God Bless..........keep ing, it takes more muscles to

Bussi
  #44  
Old Mar 22, '10, 12:26 pm
belmontmac belmontmac is offline
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bussi View Post
I can understand having misgivings about extended involvement/commitment after the weekend. I also think that the separate "tracks" for men and women is best because there are thinks that each neither are likely to bring up and discuss things they are uncomfortable talking about in mixed company. If "it was a great aid to BIL," then CRHP was at least a success on that level. CRHP is intended to "move " through the whole parish and this in the end will the true overall measure of the success of Christ Himself renewing his parish(s). We are really just His workers in the vineyard/harvest by our response to His call on our lives

My wife and I had just lived in our current location and had been members of our new parish for about two years and we had already joined the Senior adult ministry. at about this time I was wondering what more involvement in parish life should I engage in. Well, our parish announced that our parish was to receive a "gift"from another parish, an "outreach" CRHP weekend to "jump" start the CRHP process (to use a colloquialism).

We were not contacted in any way except for notices in our parish bulletin, my wife picked up the sign up sheets, and they laid on our kitchen table for about 5 days. The only activities that might possibly in some sense be construed as retreats are our Marriage Encounter weekend, a mini-engaged encounter weekend as the presenting couple, and state and nation Catholic charismatic conference. self hearing about how God was working in the witnesses lives. Sunday morning I just knew that this was something that I must be involved with and made the commitment to continue with the CRHP process.

I have been involved with CRHP continually for the last two years and have experienced marvelous fellowship. Being a septuagenarian, the vast majority of my CRHP brothers' ages correspond closely to the ages of my own children and grandchildren.

I have my own share of turmoil in my life and I can point to specific instance where sharing episodes and what I have learned through the years have been helpful in some of my CRHP brothers' lives. The bonding that occurs during each Team formation is not just to put on a weekend but to foster a realization and understanding that as Catholic Christian men we are truly brothers in Christ, who is our Brother, Friend , and most of all our Lord, and that this is the way Christ will renew our parishes, both men and women by our commitment to help in an ongoing CRHP process.

Having, been a veteran of 4 weekends so far am heading into the fifth, I have been in a position see the process working especially in the faith and prayer life of the men (and women) and their families, increases in involvement in parish activities and volunteer services to the parish at large.

Many years ago my wife and I came to the realization that we have a mutual obligation to help each other and to help our children get to Heaven, My wife is a professed Third order Discalced Carmelite (about 15 years now). This is the contemplative spiritually that appeals to her but not to me. I found that in the activities of CRHP I am most comfortable. I enjoy helping others discover the wonders of our Catholic faith in small group or one-on-one situations,especially in the size of group preparing for the next weekend. My background is basically hard science and some engineering, no formal training ac a teacher,but I suppose that what I do can be construed as sort of teaching but I prefer to look at is sharing life experiences and whatever knowledge, especially of the faith, I may have accumulated over the years.

The CRHP weekend is a very tightly packed/organized weekend in our to cover all the ground that it does, and, of necessity there is little time for the back and forth interaction that a venue like these CAF threads, thus it must be deferred to the weekly post-weekend meetings where those discussions are to my mind handled better. To me the weekend is sort of an "appetizer," the weekly meetings are the venue for more intense interaction and fellowship and is the "main course," so to speak.

To me it is similar to what happens in a marriage, the more each spouse puts into the marriage, the more each gets, especially if it is 100% on the part of both. Both I and my wife have always realized this in our 50+ years of married life. CRHP is sort of similar, there is so much to gain if you are willing to put much into it.

God Bless..........keep ing, it takes more muscles to

Bussi
Very well put, thank you.
  #45  
Old Mar 22, '10, 2:44 pm
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Default Re: CRHP (christ renews his parish)

Quote:
Sunday morning I just knew that this was something that I must be involved with and made the commitment to continue with the CRHP process.
My biggest issue with it wasn't the involvement so much as the unilateral decision. A time commitment like this with children at home is a bigger decision than one can make by themselves. And if one is unaware of that commitment until after the event, then I say "shenanigans!" It would be like saying to my wife. Honey? I just signed up for a bowling league. Enjoy your time with the kids on Wednesday nights!

Really, I'm sure it's a great program for many. But somehow, it gets communicated that if one doesn't "drink the kool-ade" one can NOT get to the proper mindset to come to Christ. Whatever did we do before CRHP was invented?

There are many secretive actions associated with this program. And I don't like some of them. The pressure to attend at our parish is less now that it use to be. My wife stood in front of Mass promoting the next CRHP weekend one Sunday. Imagine my surprise as she announced to everyone that I would be attending the next Mens retreat when we had never even discussed the situation!

If someone has not read my earlier post on the subject, my question was this. Has anyone EVER had a bad experience from CRHP? As absolutely everyone I know that went says "Oh, you HAVE to go!" Why? I would ask. "Because! You'll find out!" and then I get nothing more. Seems like going through RCIA and THEN finding out what being Catholic is all about!

Seeing the mixed reviews actually makes me feel better about it. I'm also happy to hear that the weeks that follow have more purpose than just finding volunteers to run the next one. It's a shame that some retreats don't measure up to the standards of others. I'm sure there are standards for the retreat and I do hope all that attend either know what they are getting into or are just willing to try it and experience it for what it is.
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