Adolescent Adults

eucharisteo · #1 Dec 9, '08, 6:50 pm

How does one deal with an adolescent adult in marriage?

stringbeanduck · #2 Dec 9, '08, 7:02 pm

I dunno. How are you using it? Maturity in behavior or age?

reginacaeli · #3 Dec 11, '08, 9:01 am

To some extent, we all are, especially those of us living beyond our means.

Pray for the person, practice patience, and serve as an example as much as possible.

Given the lack of detail in your question, that's all I can offer.

eucharisteo · #4 Dec 11, '08, 8:02 pm

Oh, I do all these things. Love is patient, love is kind, etc. But it's cost us dearly over the years. Chronic mistakes that never disappear. I have 2 left in my life now. One is my brother, 46, and the other is my wife, who is a very good woman. But she can't seem to be responsible with financialy matters as well of basic needs for our children. I'm a big boy and have been trying to take up here slack. But this existed even before our children were born. It's a struggle at times. She wiggs out if I try to talk about it. So I just have to live with it...suffer in silence. She's better than me though. I'm the neat freak that had to let it go...it drives me crazy. I feel like I need to retire just so I can get things on track again. We got 3 months behind on our mortgage because she wigged out and didn't tell me she hadn't paid thousands of dollars in student loans, medical bills, bills...etc. It was just amazing. In her defense, she did get sick. But that never held her back before from making the same mistakes. I'd say we've wasted about $200/month on average over that past 14 years just because I couldn't get her to balance things right. I tried to take over but got snapped at. So now our credit stinks and we've wasted lots of money over...whatever. It's very depressing.

mh2007 · #5 Dec 12, '08, 7:30 pm

It will take a joint resolution, and effort to solve. Nobody lives in a perfect world. Denial stands in the way of behavior modification, goal setting, concrete plans, actions and restraint. Both parties need to agree to confront the problem, and remedies. Household budgets are certainly fixable.

eucharisteo · #6 Dec 14, '08, 7:43 pm

And then there's mental illness. Culpability remains low in those who have been deeply wounded. This isn't a complaint session just an inquery as to one ...other's deal with adolescent adults. I'm getting lots of advice, not sharing. I remember when I used to believe I knew how to raise children correctly and others weren't doing it right. That's when I didn't have children. The same can be said about marriage, military...it goes along with the "walk a mile in my shoes".