St. Monica, Pray for us! - Page 22

MonicaRose · #**316** Oct 27, '11, 11:44 am

Ask St. Joseph for help too

praying for your and your husband's work situation

I NEVER thought I would work anything but full time and although the circumstances that led that to change were not good, I now only work about 6-7 days a month, the rest of the time I get to be with my children and I am so thankful for that, don't lose hope, ESPECIALLY since your husband also wants you to be able to stay at home.

Belle10 · #**317** Oct 29, '11, 7:12 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by JLCecilia

Monica Rose, prayers for you honey! So sorry for your suffering! May God's peace be with you!

I started sleeping on the couch about 3 weeks ago. It began as a pre-emptive sort of thing for the heartache I knew I would suffer when DH ommitted my birthday. I've stayed out of lonliness, brokenness, bitterness & resentment from his neglect. I had a church event yesterday with some new girlfriends I've made and when I came home @ 1:30, the baby's diaper hadn't been changed from the night before and the kids hadn't been fed lunch and DH was laying on the couch watching t.v. After I fed everyone and got them down for naps, DH gets up to go back to bed and makes a pass at me. When I tell him 'don't' he says to me 'guess I'm never gonna get l**d again.'

Love you all, it's so sad we're all here out of brokennes. I pray for God's help being joyful or at least peaceful amidst my suffering. I don't feel that brooding is really the attitude to have carrying this cross, but I am weak. Prayers for you all.

The first bolded part: I'm so sorry.

It sounds like maybe he's depressed -- will he seek help? Forgive me for intruding, and I'll stick to prayers only if that's better.

The second bolded part: you're so right. I always remember after the fact that I should be quiet in my suffering, instead of proclaiming it loudly to anyone who will listen. It sure is hard to do. We just have to keep trying!

Quote:

Originally Posted by JLCecilia

Finally opened the floodgates to DH last night after holding in the hurt for 3 weeks. We expressed our sorrow to one another in not being better spouses and we were softened again to one another. Even though our habits and such which led up to this aren't likely to change, we're at least beginning again.

Right now what I need is prayers for his work. Things are getting ready to change again which will mandate his working weekends ALL the time and he is already burnt out. He expressed his wish that he could just work 9-5 M-F which is probably unrealistic considering he cannot get up before 10 a.m. But, both of us have a very strong desire for him to be the sole breadwinner so that I may stay at home full time. Not sure if/when that will ever happen, but def. asking for St. Jude's intercession this week. I've heard of a novena to St. Juan Diego for the purpose of employment, but I'm not aware of any others, if anyone would like to share. Any saint is great for any cause really.

Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me a sinner!

Such hope here! I'm glad you were able to talk with each other. Maybe baby steps in habits can lead to bigger changes in the future.

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

TheRealJuliane · #**318** Nov 5, '11, 1:11 pm

Hi everyone,

I'd like to request some prayer for my husband, and for my marriage. We got into a discussion today about the Church, our sexual practices, how we each see things, and it wasn't good. The synopsis for those who don't already know it: Hubby and I were both fallen-away Catholics when we met, we had premarital sex, later cohabitated and then got married, neither with the intention of being Catholic again. I never was antagonistic toward the Church, just exploring because my convert father did not provide guidance; my husband was pretty devout as a young boy, but then got angry at the Church and God when his parents were divorcing. I returned to the Church after our first son was born; he has faked it for the boys' sake while they were growing up, but still retains his anger although he isn't aware of it on a daily basis. He told me about it once or twice and then it's as if he gets amnesia. I think he's in denial about a lot of things that happened to him growing up. Needless to say, there is a wide chasm between us. We've been married 22 years total, 12 years since our marriage in the Church. I guess he did all that for me since he believes little of it. It breaks my heart and I pray for him, but so far, all my return has done is pull us apart.

Anyway, somehow we started talking about what sexual acts are OK with the Church and why, and things went downhill from there. At one point he even said it would be easiest if he'd just leave! That he wouldn't have to deal with the gulf between us on a daily basis then. I can't figure out what that looks like in real life, except that we've had problems with intimacy, but I haven't brought up the Church in that regard until today. I just do what we always have done and then go to confession afterward.

He was very detached and intellectual, as he always is when the topic comes up, and the anger of course plays across his face when he talks about the Church's tenets. (He is one of those people who could never play poker because what he is feeling is written all over his face.) He talked about the Church being "pro-birth" but that pro-lifers (me included since I pray at Planned Parenthood) are hypocritical because we don't then take care of that born baby through its life. He sounds just like the pro-aborts!!!

There was more, but I won't go into it. Just know that he needs prayer, that God would be able to melt his heart and soften his anger and bring my husband back to the One who loves him more than anything. And that our marriage would survive, it would kill our sons if he left. I think he probably doesn't love me any more, from the things he is saying.

Thank you, and I appreciate you all so much.

cviolette · #**319** Nov 7, '11, 3:33 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

Hi everyone,

I'd like to request some prayer for my husband, and for my marriage. We got into a discussion today about the Church, our sexual practices, how we each see things, and it wasn't good. The synopsis for those who don't already know it: Hubby and I were both fallen-away Catholics when we met, we had premarital sex, later cohabitated and then got married, neither with the intention of being Catholic again. I never was antagonistic toward the Church, just exploring because my convert father did not provide guidance; my husband was pretty devout as a young boy, but then got angry at the Church and God when his parents were divorcing. I returned to the Church after our first son was born; he has faked it for the boys' sake while they were growing up, but still retains his anger although he isn't aware of it on a daily basis. He told me about it once or twice and then it's as if he gets amnesia. I think he's in denial about a lot of things that happened to him growing up. Needless to say, there is a wide chasm between us. We've been married 22 years total, 12 years since our marriage in the Church. I guess he did all that for me since he believes little of it. It breaks my heart and I pray for him, but so far, all my return has done is pull us apart.

Anyway, somehow we started talking about what sexual acts are OK with the Church and why, and things went downhill from there. At one point he even said it would be easiest if he'd just leave! That he wouldn't have to deal with the gulf between us on a daily basis then. I can't figure out what that looks like in real life, except that we've had problems with intimacy, but I haven't brought up the Church in that regard until today. I just do what we always have done and then go to confession afterward.

He was very detached and intellectual, as he always is when the topic comes up, and the anger of course plays across his face when he talks about the Church's tenets. (He is one of those people who could never play poker because what he is feeling is written all over his face.) He talked about the Church being "pro-birth" but that pro-lifers (me included since I pray at Planned Parenthood) are hypocritical because we don't then take care of that born baby through its life. He sounds just like the pro-aborts!!!

There was more, but I won't go into it. Just know that he needs prayer, that God would be able to melt his heart and soften his anger and bring my husband back to the One who loves him more than anything. And that our marriage would survive, it would kill our sons if he left. I think he probably doesn't love me any more, from the things he is saying.

Thank you, and I appreciate you all so much.

I will keep you and my family in my prayers.

You know that I am having difficulties in my marriage. I have a difficult time thinking about the future when the children are all gone. I started praying for peace and happiness. Just focusing on each day. I am putting my trust in God's plan even though I do not understand His plan. I do not see any changes in my husband but I do in my children. They ask questions about religion and are letting God be part of their lives.

I am also a pro-lifer. And what your husband says is wrong. I love little children and so do the other protesters. I believe that being pro-life is not just about abortion. It is from conception to death. I also visit a nursing home. I am all for programs that help the poor but just disagree on what programs work.

I am sure as a stay at home mom, you have also helped other families. How many times have you driven other people children to school or sports events because the parents had to work? How many times have you volunteered to go on school trips? Volunteered at school? These are just a couple ways that you might have helped children.

TheRealJuliane · #**320** Nov 7, '11, 6:05 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by cviolette

I will keep you and my family in my prayers.

You know that I am having difficulties in my marriage. I have a difficult time thinking about the future when the children are all gone. I started praying for peace and happiness. Just focusing on each day. I am putting my trust in God's plan even though I do not understand His plan. I do not see any changes in my husband but I do in my children. They ask questions about religion and are letting God be part of their lives.

I am also a pro-lifer. And what your husband says is wrong. I love little children and so do the other protesters. I believe that being pro-life is not just about abortion. It is from conception to death. I also visit a nursing home. I am all for programs that help the poor but just disagree on what programs work.

I am sure as a stay at home mom, you have also helped other families. How many times have you driven other people children to school or sports events because the parents had to work? How many times have you volunteered to go on school trips? Volunteered at school? These are just a couple ways that you might have helped children.

Thanks for your prayers. I thought things were going better for you, but I also realize that these patterns are very difficult to change.

We are one year away from when both of our sons will be gone. That gives me great trepidation. What will we have, together? I broke down and cried so hard Saturday that I couldn't even go to Mass because I would just have continued to cry...Because my husband has been so angry at the Church and at God for so long, since I brought all of that back into his life, I think he is angry at me now, as a representative of the Church. He started intellectualizing everything I said during our talk, arguing as if he really were debating with God. There's a HUGE gulf between us and it grows wider all the time.

I know it's wrong of me, but I can't help but wonder if I were a better Catholic, if he would want to come back to God...I know I am not one of those joyful Christians, since I struggle with chronic depression, and since we have problems with sexual intimacy he can now blame all of that on the Church too...it's just all so sad. I did tell him that I regret how we started our relationship because I believe that what God wants for all of us is the best and that does not include pre-marital sex or cohabitation. That there is a spiritual component to sex that we have never had, and that makes me sad. I'm sure he can't related. From his perspective, we were doing just fine before that transformation I had when our son was born. But even after that, I haven't been that great a Catholic, it's been a gradual process. I mean, I was still using contraception at that point so I wasn't very consistent...

He feels that he has made a big sacrifice by just not tearing down our faith, he said he could have done that all along. Obviously he's wanted to, but has held back. I suppose I should be grateful for that, at least.

Thanks again for your prayers. They mean a lot to me. I have no idea what is going to happen. But my heart is broken again.

cviolette · #**321** Nov 7, '11, 1:35 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

Thanks for your prayers. I thought things were going better for you, but I also realize that these patterns are very difficult to change.

We are one year away from when both of our sons will be gone. That gives me great trepidation. What will we have, together? I broke down and cried so hard Saturday that I couldn't even go to Mass because I would just have continued to cry...Because my husband has been so angry at the Church and at God for so long, since I brought all of that back into his life, I think he is angry at me now, as a representative of the Church. He started intellectualizing everything I said during our talk, arguing as if he really were debating with God. There's a HUGE gulf between us and it grows wider all the time.

I know it's wrong of me, but I can't help but wonder if I were a better Catholic, if he would want to come back to God...I know I am not one of those joyful Christians, since I struggle with chronic depression, and since we have problems with sexual intimacy he can now blame all of that on the Church too...it's just all so sad. I did tell him that I regret how we started our relationship because I believe that what God wants for all of us is the best and that does not include pre-marital sex or cohabitation. That there is a spiritual component to sex that we have never had, and that makes me sad. I'm sure he can't related. From his perspective, we were doing just fine before that transformation I had when our son was born. But even after that, I haven't been that great a Catholic, it's been a gradual process. I mean, I was still using contraception at that point so I wasn't very consistent...

He feels that he has made a big sacrifice by just not tearing down our faith, he said he could have done that all along. Obviously he's wanted to, but has held back. I suppose I should be grateful for that, at least.

Thanks again for your prayers. They mean a lot to me. I have no idea what is going to happen. But my heart is broken again.

My marriage did not improve but I am happy. I just need to get myself in a better place with God and to trust God will not give me more than I can handle. I feel at peace but lose the peace when I try to focus too much on the future. I made so many mistakes, it wouldn't take much for my whole world to be turned upside down.

Disagreeing over religion is tough. My husband doesn't not believe in most of what the Church teaches. We just don't discuss some issues. But that is the pattern in my marriage avoid all difficult topics. My brother is very anti-Christian. To the point, where he said he looks forward to the rapture when all the Christians are gone. It will be a better world and that he would choose hell over heaven. I learned that arguing with him fueled his anger. I learn to just say Blessed Be God Forever and walk away.

I don't think we can change our husbands. Just continue to pray for your husband and let God handle the rest.

I have never had the spiritual component of sex either. I do wish I was a better person and made better choices. You can not change the past. God has forgiven you for your sins. Now you need to forgive yourself.

I will keep praying for you. I think what saved me in my self-destruction phase was all the prayers from the members of CAF.

MonicaRose · #**322** Nov 7, '11, 8:00 pm

Hello,

praying for all of the intentions here. Cviolette, your words are so right, our responsiblity is to pray for our husbands, not to change them. I need to remember that every minute of every day. I keep thinking the same things, if only I was better, if only...and of course we should be working constantly at bettering ourselves, but not with the expectation that our husbands will suddenly change.
Saint Monica, please pray for us, that we may be guided by the Holy
Spirit to pray for our husbands when it is hardest to do so.
Mother Mary, please pray for us when we are unable to pray ourselves.
Saint Joseph, please pray for our husbands.

Belle10 · #**323** Nov 7, '11, 8:12 pm

I'm so sorry for all the pain that's been written of lately.

and

for all here.

Might I again suggest praying for the intercession of Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur? Her husband Felix was an atheist who openly mocked her for her faith and actually almost turned her away from God, though thankfully did not. Upon her death he found her secret journals that chronicled all the years of suffering (emtional and physical) she not only dealt with, but asked for and offered for his soul. He later became a Catholic priest. Here is how Archbishop Fulton Sheen -- who studied under Felix -- used to tell their story.

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

TheRealJuliane · #**324** Nov 8, '11, 8:30 am

Wow, Belle, what an inspiring story! Thank you for showing it to me!

I will indeed, as for Elisabeth Leseur's intercession.

Belle10 · #**325** Nov 9, '11, 5:39 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRealJuliane

Wow, Belle, what an inspiring story! Thank you for showing it to me!

I will indeed, as for Elisabeth Leseur's intercession.

She is so awesome!

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

Belle10 · #**326** Nov 14, '11, 8:22 am

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica, St. Augustine, and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

Belle10 · #**327** Nov 17, '11, 11:01 am

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica, St. Augustine, and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

nordskoven · #**328** Dec 2, '11, 1:47 am

Dearest heavenly saint and earthly mother, Saint Monica, weep for us as profligate brothers and sisters of Jesus Christ. Comfort His and our Blessed Mother, and bring us to loving obedience and meek conformation to the will of God. Bring us all safely to Heaven with purest souls because God is our righteousness.

Belle10 · #**329** Dec 9, '11, 4:59 am

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(personal intentions and the intentions of all on this thread)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

St. Monica and Servant of God Elisabeth Leseur, pray for us!

NPalmby · #**330** Dec 23, '11, 2:24 pm

Please pray for my family. I won't write out everything that's been going on, but my husband is very angry (about a lot of things) and taking his anger out on me (NOT PHYSICALLY). Please pray that he can find peace and self-control, that he will regain his faith and lean on God for strength. Please pray that I can be an example of Christ's love to him, and that I can have patience and grace in this situation, and offer up my suffering to the Lord. Please also pray that our marriage can be healed.

My mother, who is divorced, says she sees a lot of my father in my husband, and she's afraid that he won't change, or that his anger will escalate. She said she wants the kids and I to be safe and happy, and she thinks the best course of action would be to leave. I love my husband. I don't want to leave him. Please pray that the Lord will guide me to follow His will in this matter, no matter what that means.