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  #1  
Old Jan 19, '10, 1:43 pm
tenderheart tenderheart is offline
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Default First Communion Dress

Hello,
My daughter will be receiving her First Communion this year. I found a white dress with a touch of pale pink on it. Does the dress have to be ALL white or can it have some color in it?
  #2  
Old Jan 19, '10, 1:44 pm
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Melissa Melissa is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

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Originally Posted by tenderheart View Post
Hello,
My daughter will be receiving her First Communion this year. I found a white dress with a touch of pale pink on it. Does the dress have to be ALL white or can it have some color in it?
Check the rules in your parish, because they can vary quite widely.
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  #3  
Old Jan 19, '10, 2:24 pm
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SMHW SMHW is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

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Originally Posted by Melissa View Post
Check the rules in your parish, because they can vary quite widely.
I'll just add that is is not a matter that the Church at large cares about. But your local parish may care.
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  #4  
Old Jan 19, '10, 2:33 pm
puzzleannie puzzleannie is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

Quote:
Originally Posted by tenderheart View Post
Hello,
My daughter will be receiving her First Communion this year. I found a white dress with a touch of pale pink on it. Does the dress have to be ALL white or can it have some color in it?
there is nothing in canon law at all that specifies dress for first communion. Ask at your parish. Otherwise dress should be appropriate for Mass, clean and modest. Dress or skirt and top for girls with dress shoes and sox or hose, dress pants and shirt for boys with dress shoes and sox. Belt or tie not required unless the type of garments chosen call for them. Different parishes have different rules and customs so ask there before you spend money.
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  #5  
Old Jan 19, '10, 2:40 pm
yellowbird yellowbird is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

Quote:
Originally Posted by tenderheart View Post
Hello,
My daughter will be receiving her First Communion this year. I found a white dress with a touch of pale pink on it. Does the dress have to be ALL white or can it have some color in it?
I'd also check with the parish religious instructor to find out if the girls always wear all white. I was told it didn't matter what my older daughter wore when she received her first communion (we were converts.. she was in 4th grade) I asked if her dress needed to be white and was told no - it could be whatever she liked. Easy enough. Imagine how upsetting it was when my daughter realized she was the only girl in a navy blue poka dot dress in a sea of other girls all in white. What did we know? I wish the religious instructor would've told me there were no hard fast rules but everyone else will probably be in white. It would've saved my daughter some tears/embarassment.
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Old Jan 19, '10, 3:28 pm
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Will B Will B is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress



My wife elected to wear white for her first communion.. She likes the traditional pre-Vatican II look. >> The other ladies wore other colors..

I wore a white dinner jacket with black pants and black shoes.

We were received in September of 2009.
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  #7  
Old Jan 19, '10, 6:12 pm
yellowbird yellowbird is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

Your wife looks BEAUTIFUL, Will B.!!!!! Congratulations to you both!
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  #8  
Old Jan 19, '10, 7:25 pm
Joe Kelley Joe Kelley is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

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Originally Posted by yellowbird View Post
I'd also check with the parish religious instructor to find out if the girls always wear all white. I was told it didn't matter what my older daughter wore when she received her first communion (we were converts.. she was in 4th grade) I asked if her dress needed to be white and was told no - it could be whatever she liked. Easy enough. Imagine how upsetting it was when my daughter realized she was the only girl in a navy blue poka dot dress in a sea of other girls all in white. What did we know? I wish the religious instructor would've told me there were no hard fast rules but everyone else will probably be in white. It would've saved my daughter some tears/embarassment.
I agree. Make sure she is not odd one out.
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Old Jan 19, '10, 8:07 pm
EasterJoy EasterJoy is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

It's like a wedding dress. Provided it is modest and appropriate for Mass, the Church cares not at all.

Ask the other moms in her class, but generally speaking, think white dress as in a traditional bride's. Pink roses as adornment, probably fine and very sweet. Pink polka dots all through it, well...it depends on how your daughter feels about being different. Red or black: don't, even if she likes being a maverick. It isn't a day to make a statement.

Again, like a wedding dress, it is important that the dress reflect the day's importance, and yet not go so far as to seem to take on an importance all of its own, either, no matter what anyone else in the parish is doing. Far more than a wedding, after all, it is a day that is all about the Bridegroom.

PS There was a time when First Communion dresses would often be appropriate for solemn Masses beyond that one day. If it is all white, maybe one might change out the sash, so as not to compete with the flower girls, and wear it to a wedding.
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Old Jan 20, '10, 4:23 am
Phemie Phemie is online now
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

In our parish the parents are told that anything that is clean and modest is OK to wear for first Communion. We usually end up with a variety: a few girls who look like little brides, girls dressed in regular dresses, boys in suits and boys in school clothes.

My own daughter, 22 years ago, wore a white dress with a pink sash. It wasn't bride-like and she was able to wear it as her 'church dress' for the next year. I've noted a shift away from the traditional 'First Communion little bride' look in many parishes where I've been over the years.
  #11  
Old Jan 20, '10, 7:20 am
puzzleannie puzzleannie is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

there is no theology behind the "first communion dress as bridal gown" thinking.

If as we and many parishes do first communion is within the context of the parish Sunday Mass and "family style" with the candidate coming to communion with her family, the "stand out from the crowd" issue does not arise. Also in a poor parish like this many families are relieved that one purchase can be the Sunday dress for the rest of the year, without an expensive one-time purchase.

in my day of course, the first communion dress (or suit) WAS the Sunday and special occasion dress for most girls for the rest of the year (until we outgrew them) and we wore them for parish events like 40 hours, when the bishop came, a wedding etc. as well as our Sunday alternative to our school uniforms, and few of us owned anything else except gym and play clothes.

I would only add the suggestion that the dress be age appropriate, as older girls can feel silly in styles intended for younger children. Conversely styles for children's dresses can be too mature, IMO so shop carefully.
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  #12  
Old Jan 20, '10, 8:29 am
tenderheart tenderheart is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

Thank you for your response! Greatly Appreciated!
  #13  
Old Jan 20, '10, 9:06 am
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Will B Will B is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

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Originally Posted by yellowbird View Post
Your wife looks BEAUTIFUL, Will B.!!!!! Congratulations to you both!
Thank you... It was a long road to Rome.. We now belong to a wonderful parish with a priest that has been given many gifts (talents) from God.
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  #14  
Old Jan 20, '10, 10:32 am
EasterJoy EasterJoy is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

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Originally Posted by puzzleannie View Post
there is no theology behind the "first communion dress as bridal gown" thinking.

If as we and many parishes do first communion is within the context of the parish Sunday Mass and "family style" with the candidate coming to communion with her family, the "stand out from the crowd" issue does not arise. Also in a poor parish like this many families are relieved that one purchase can be the Sunday dress for the rest of the year, without an expensive one-time purchase.

in my day of course, the first communion dress (or suit) WAS the Sunday and special occasion dress for most girls for the rest of the year (until we outgrew them) and we wore them for parish events like 40 hours, when the bishop came, a wedding etc. as well as our Sunday alternative to our school uniforms, and few of us owned anything else except gym and play clothes.

I would only add the suggestion that the dress be age appropriate, as older girls can feel silly in styles intended for younger children. Conversely styles for children's dresses can be too mature, IMO so shop carefully.
I think that selecting clothing that will be appropriate for Sunday Mass and formal occasions like weddings after the day of one's First Holy Communion is an excellent one.

The truth is, there isn't any theology behind wearing a one-use extravaganza when one marries, either. My grandmother dyed her wedding dress brown, and then wore it for many years thereafter as her Sunday dress. Selecting something that can be worn in the future is a good way to keep from going overboard into the realm of "princess for a day". I have nothing against wedding gowns that are clearly wedding gowns and only that, but the desire to be the center of attention is a good temptation to nip in the bud.
  #15  
Old Jan 20, '10, 11:18 pm
Elizabeth502 Elizabeth502 is offline
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Default Re: First Communion Dress

It's not that the responses are not accurate: they are. But they do demonstrate how (as usual!) I am the odd one out in these discussions, and on these occasions.

First Communion was a pretty intense day for me and for all those who remember that day, that I can think of. I, and all I know, preferred a traditional look not because it was "bride-y", but because it was formal and tasteful. I've seen some modern 1st communion events. What strikes me is not the particular style of dress, but the particular lack of care in presentation. This is not a matter of money but of grooming. For example, recently I was looking at 1st comm. photos of a parish I know. I didn't see the boys; maybe they looked better. But the girls looked "thrown together." Straggly hair, sandals instead of shoes, and just very little care (a task which belongs to the mother to oversee). And yet they were all wearing white (& various kinds of headpieces -- some veils, some not). These were not poor families, either.

I don't expect modern girls necessarily to go to the extent that my own mother did with a pin-tucked hand-made organza dress & custom petticoat & white gloves, but on modern girls I would prefer to see more care in however they present themselves, including if it's a simple outfit as described in some posts above.

For the record, my own daughters did not at all look "bride-y." They both had unique white dresses which were adapted from previous uses and then later, for following uses. (In line with some of the posts above) Yet they definitely fit right in & rec'd compliments on the taste shown. They did not wear veils, but flowers that coordinated with the dress. So in other words, they were modern. Perhaps the difference is, I insisted on grooming & appropriate shoes.

It's a special once-in-a-lifetime day. Appearance is not the focus, but neither is appearance inconsequential to the sense of specialness, i.m.o. It's just part of the care one takes, whatever the budget & whatever the style chosen.
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