Most likely, it will continue to feel lonely to you, 3D, because you'll be living in a "parallel universe," so to speak. I was already a square peg in a round hole world the moment I was born, but finally succumbing to a longstanding intractable illness made me downright "blimpy."
It is comforting to find folks who have the same condition (or very similar), but we're too sick to get together much (some of them I know only from online).
As for family, that varies: father's side thought I had "been sick long enough" several months after the illness finally felled me. Mother is very understanding, even before she got cancer herself.
Friends? Only one old one remains truly "connected," and that's because she and her husband came down with a severe case of the same illness as me 10 years ago (chemical poisoning from their house).
Most of the time, I try to give the illness the "cold shoulder," not that I can ignore it (after all, it incapacitated me 21 years ago, after increasingly harassing me for the previous 9 years), but I mean, I try to do things (even if it's just reading while lying down) to keep my mind off it.
Have a lot of struggles with anger (in the form of resentment and irritability, not so much in the form of blowing up), but then, that's kind of understandable when you're in a pain a lot, and where once you were a super-achiever, now you can just manage a tablespoon or 2 a day of activity (or to put it another way: in terms of energy, I used to be a nuclear bomb, now I'm a toy pistol cap
).
Hope your disability comes through.
Feb 10, '11, 7:13 pm
Square Pegs Trying To Make a Living
Re: Square Pegs Trying To Make a Living
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