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  #1  
Old Dec 10, '11, 12:51 pm
EnglishTeacher EnglishTeacher is offline
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Default Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Is it a mortal sin to have occasional romantic thoughts about a priest? I'm not talking about being "in love" with him or even a crush--just attraction that occasionally turns into silly (brief) little daydreams.

I usually am pretty good about pushing those thoughts away as soon as they pop up, but I worry that sometimes I might have consented to the temptation to indulge them.

Of course, I will continue trying to get rid of those thoughts. But I just need to know if I need to go to confession for it (to a different priest, of course). For some reason, I have difficulty being able to tell which sins are mortal.

(Edit to add one more thing: If I confess it, is it necessary to say that I have had those feelings for a priest? Is it enough just to say that I have been struggling with romantic feelings for someone who is unavailable and whom I shouldn't be thinking about?)
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  #2  
Old Dec 10, '11, 1:24 pm
Matrix Refugee Matrix Refugee is offline
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Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

I don't think it's any more sinful than it would be to have these kind of thoughts about any other attractive man, whether he's a priest or a layman. As long as you gently move your thoughts to something else, rather than obsess over them, you should be fine.
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  #3  
Old Dec 10, '11, 1:29 pm
Bezant Bezant is offline
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Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Quote:
Originally Posted by EnglishTeacher View Post
Is it a mortal sin to have occasional romantic thoughts about a priest? I'm not talking about being "in love" with him or even a crush--just attraction that occasionally turns into silly (brief) little daydreams.

I usually am pretty good about pushing those thoughts away as soon as they pop up, but I worry that sometimes I might have consented to the temptation to indulge them.

Of course, I will continue trying to get rid of those thoughts. But I just need to know if I need to go to confession for it (to a different priest, of course). For some reason, I have difficulty being able to tell which sins are mortal.

(Edit to add one more thing: If I confess it, is it necessary to say that I have had those feelings for a priest? Is it enough just to say that I have been struggling with romantic feelings for someone who is unavailable and whom I shouldn't be thinking about?)
Any innocent crush is completely normal and okay, as long as they don't become obsessive. I know it feels strange. I once fancied a novice at our church for a few months.
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  #4  
Old Dec 10, '11, 2:31 pm
Jesus_123 Jesus_123 is offline
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Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

+Actually what you are dealing with is in reality a . . . temptation to sin . . . from the evil one . . . any time such a thought pops into your head . . . discipline yourself to refuse to entertain it for even a second . . . just mentally say a . . . firm and absolute . . . NO! . . . followed by the phrase . . . "God bless _____________ . to break the established pattern of encountering a continuing temptation to sin in thought . . .

Priests, ministers, doctors, lawyers, teachers, etc. . . . often encounter what is called . . . "transference of affections" . . . which is a type of infactuation . . . in their public practice of their vocations/disciplines . . . while it is not unusual . . . it needs to be recognized and dealt with as a temptation and as inappropriate so that it doesn't get out of hand . . . not lingered upon . . . loving one another as brothers and sisters in the Lord is fine and we are instructed to so care about one another . . . but that affection needs to be tempered with prudence and caution . . . and disciplined . . . so as not to allow it to drift into romantic pursuits . . .

James 4:7 "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."

God bless . . .


PRAYER TO

SAINT MICHAEL
THE ARCHANGEL


St. Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our defense against the wickedness
and snares of the Devil.
May God rebuke him,
we humbly pray,
and do
thou, O Prince of the heavenly hosts,
by the power of God,
thrust into hell Satan,
and all the evil spirits,
who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls.
Amen.

. . . all for Jesus+
. . . thank You Blessed Lord our Saviour+
. . . thank you Blessed Virgin Mary our Mother+
. . . thank you Blessed Holy Mother Church+
. . . thank you Blessed St. Michael+
. . . Holy Archangel of God+

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  #5  
Old Dec 10, '11, 4:33 pm
Nom the Wise's Avatar
Nom the Wise Nom the Wise is offline
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Join Date: April 12, 2008
Posts: 1,123
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Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus_123 View Post
+Actually what you are dealing with is in reality a . . . temptation to sin . . . from the evil one . . . any time such a thought pops into your head . . . discipline yourself to refuse to entertain it for even a second . . . just mentally say a . . . firm and absolute . . . NO! . . . followed by the phrase . . . "God bless _____________ . to break the established pattern of encountering a continuing temptation to sin in thought . . .

Priests, ministers, doctors, lawyers, teachers, etc. . . . often encounter what is called . . . "transference of affections" . . . which is a type of infactuation . . . in their public practice of their vocations/disciplines . . . while it is not unusual . . . it needs to be recognized and dealt with as a temptation and as inappropriate so that it doesn't get out of hand . . . not lingered upon . . . loving one another as brothers and sisters in the Lord is fine and we are instructed to so care about one another . . . but that affection needs to be tempered with prudence and caution . . . and disciplined . . . so as not to allow it to drift into romantic pursuits . . .

James 4:7 "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."

God bless . . .


PRAYER TO

SAINT MICHAEL
THE ARCHANGEL


St. Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our defense against the wickedness
and snares of the Devil.
May God rebuke him,
we humbly pray,
and do
thou, O Prince of the heavenly hosts,
by the power of God,
thrust into hell Satan,
and all the evil spirits,
who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls.
Amen.

. . . all for Jesus+
. . . thank You Blessed Lord our Saviour+
. . . thank you Blessed Virgin Mary our Mother+
. . . thank you Blessed Holy Mother Church+
. . . thank you Blessed St. Michael+
. . . Holy Archangel of God+

Hey Jesus_123, I totally dig what you've done here! Are you an art student?

EnglishTeacher, I was an English teacher once myself. It's all the literature that we read. It's not healthy for us. You'll be fine of course. Ordained and lay religious are human. Sometimes they're cute. It will pass.
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…Thus he died, Nóm the Wise. Lord of the caves. Friend of Man...
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  #6  
Old Dec 11, '11, 12:44 am
Dakota Roberts Dakota Roberts is offline
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Join Date: December 20, 2010
Posts: 3,341
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Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bezant View Post
Any innocent crush is completely normal and okay, as long as they don't become obsessive. I know it feels strange. I once fancied a novice at our church for a few months.
What if they become more obsessive the harder you try to push them away (for someone in general)?
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  #7  
Old Dec 11, '11, 3:16 am
Gethsemane Gethsemane is offline
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Join Date: February 16, 2009
Posts: 118
Religion: Currently Converting to Catholicism
Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Quote:
Originally Posted by EnglishTeacher View Post
Is it a mortal sin to have occasional romantic thoughts about a priest? I'm not talking about being "in love" with him or even a crush--just attraction that occasionally turns into silly (brief) little daydreams.

I usually am pretty good about pushing those thoughts away as soon as they pop up, but I worry that sometimes I might have consented to the temptation to indulge them.

Of course, I will continue trying to get rid of those thoughts. But I just need to know if I need to go to confession for it (to a different priest, of course). For some reason, I have difficulty being able to tell which sins are mortal.

(Edit to add one more thing: If I confess it, is it necessary to say that I have had those feelings for a priest? Is it enough just to say that I have been struggling with romantic feelings for someone who is unavailable and whom I shouldn't be thinking about?)
IF these day dreams are romantic/sexual in nature - that's lust. Wouldn't matter if it was a priest or your husband, it's a sin although venial. I'd recommend confessing to a different priest. You don't have to get into the details in confession - just say you've had romantic thoughts about someone. Remember: You're really confessing to Jesus and he's already aware of the full extent of your thoughts.
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  #8  
Old Dec 11, '11, 3:41 pm
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AnneTeresa AnneTeresa is offline
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Join Date: October 8, 2010
Posts: 961
Religion: catholic
Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

[quote=Gethsemane;8679520]IF these day dreams are romantic/sexual in nature - that's lust. Wouldn't matter if it was a priest or your husband, it's a sin although venial. I'd recommend confessing to a different priest. You don't have to get into the details in confession - just say you've had romantic thoughts about someone. Remember: You're really confessing to Jesus and he's already aware of the full extent of your thoughts.[/QUOTE/]

I don't think that romantic thoughts are sinful, even toward a priest. If you keep entertaining them they are, but just the thought/attraction is not. And even less so if it's your husband. Why do you think romantic thoughts toward your husband would be sinful?
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  #9  
Old Dec 11, '11, 5:33 pm
Gethsemane Gethsemane is offline
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Join Date: February 16, 2009
Posts: 118
Religion: Currently Converting to Catholicism
Default Re: Is it a mortal sin to have romantic thoughts about a priest?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnneTeresa View Post
I don't think that romantic thoughts are sinful, even toward a priest. If you keep entertaining them they are, but just the thought/attraction is not. And even less so if it's your husband. Why do you think romantic thoughts toward your husband would be sinful?
Attraction and thoughts are fine. It's when you start entertaining thoughts (actively engaging them) that you run the risk of commiting a sin.

Lust is sinful regardless who the person in question is. Lust involves thoughts of a romantic or sexual nature in which you imagine what you would do to a person. You focus on their body or on sexual actions. You thus objectifiy your spouse and don't honour their dignity. Your spouse is not there for you endless pleasure to do whatever you want to them. They are actually there for the sake of your own salvation. They deserve just as must repect and recognization of dignity as a suggestively clad person on the street.

Now, if your thoughts are something along the lines of tossing Malteasers in their mouth or holding your child in their arms, there's nothing wrong with that. Basically, don't actively engage in thoughts that contain things you wouldn't want your kids to see.
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