Action to be ex-Mormon

belchers1 · #1 Feb 22, '12, 2:01 pm

My husband and I were previously Mormon, but we're not very active in the church, ever. We are coming into the Catholic Church this Easter!

A week or two ago, I received a phone call from our visiting teacher from the Mormon church. We spoke for a half an hour, about religion. (I was trying to plant a seed in his head

) He asked if I would like to have official excommunication, and I replied that it didn't really matter to me, as I don't hold the Mormon church as 'real', anyway. He said he'd inform the leadership, and told me that they may contact me. I said that I didn't mind.

Today, he called me back, and was not as friendly as the first time. He gave me the name of the bishop of the ward we'd be assigned to, and his home address. He told me we need to write a letter stating that we no longer wish to have communications with the church, and that both my husband and I need to sign it. He said it would be in the best interest of both parties.

Should I do this?

Part of me thinks that it's only costing me time, and a stamp, and it's not a big deal, but then I don't feel it's necessary. Why should I have to put anything in writing and sign it?

Jerusha · #2 Feb 22, '12, 2:17 pm

Since they initiated the contact, and you no longer want to belong, this is the best way to avoid further harassment.
http://www.exmormon.org/remove.htm
Some do it, some do not. It seems that you are among those for whom it would be a reasonable choice. Others, who have concerns about family members who are deeply committed, choose to make it a private thing.
Please make the first move, before they try to make a socially stigmatizing move on you. It is an act of dignity, not their act of judgment on you.

belchers1 · #3 Feb 22, '12, 2:21 pm

Wow! Thanks for that info!

Jerusha · #4 Feb 22, '12, 2:22 pm

YW!

batman1973 · #5 Feb 22, '12, 3:01 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jerusha

Since they initiated the contact, and you no longer want to belong, this is the best way to avoid further harassment.
http://www.exmormon.org/remove.htm
Some do it, some do not. It seems that you are among those for whom it would be a reasonable choice. Others, who have concerns about family members who are deeply committed, choose to make it a private thing.
Please make the first move, before they try to make a socially stigmatizing move on you. It is an act of dignity, not their act of judgment on you.

That's how I did it. The "church" wanted to have a "Bishop's Court" for a formal excommunication, but, I wasnt interested in a kangaroo court.

truthsave · #6 Feb 22, '12, 3:05 pm

Welcome to Christianity!

Yes you should sign it.
For them is also a kind of "do you really want to go against Lord's Will? Sign the paper if you dare" .
After you will have signed this paper generally a letter will follow signet by the president of the stake that will worn you that if you will keep on your decision within a month you will be considered out of their register and loose all the benediction that are upon you.
At least this is exatly the letter my wife receive. I don't know if is "standard".

God bless you both

RebeccaJ · #7 Feb 22, '12, 3:51 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by belchers1

Part of me thinks that it's only costing me time, and a stamp, and it's not a big deal, but then I don't feel it's necessary. Why should I have to put anything in writing and sign it?

You don't have to do anything.

You could always include Pillar Of Fire, Pillar Of Truth in your mail, just to make it worth the time and stamp.

Welcome home.

grandfather · #8 Feb 22, '12, 4:03 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by belchers1

My husband and I were previously Mormon, but we're not very active in the church, ever. We are coming into the Catholic Church this Easter!

Just curious. Were you raised Mormon?

FabiusMaximus · #9 Feb 22, '12, 5:40 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by belchers1

My husband and I were previously Mormon, but we're not very active in the church, ever. We are coming into the Catholic Church this Easter!

A week or two ago, I received a phone call from our visiting teacher from the Mormon church. We spoke for a half an hour, about religion. (I was trying to plant a seed in his head

) He asked if I would like to have official excommunication, and I replied that it didn't really matter to me, as I don't hold the Mormon church as 'real', anyway. He said he'd inform the leadership, and told me that they may contact me. I said that I didn't mind.

Today, he called me back, and was not as friendly as the first time. He gave me the name of the bishop of the ward we'd be assigned to, and his home address. He told me we need to write a letter stating that we no longer wish to have communications with the church, and that both my husband and I need to sign it. He said it would be in the best interest of both parties.

Should I do this?

Part of me thinks that it's only costing me time, and a stamp, and it's not a big deal, but then I don't feel it's necessary. Why should I have to put anything in writing and sign it?

Do it and get it over with. Might as well.

belchers1 · #10 Feb 22, '12, 6:11 pm

Thank you for the feedback!

Kangaroo court! Too funny, Batman!

Rebecca, that is actually a great idea! I just made do that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by grandfather

Just curious. Were you raised Mormon?

I was raised in an inactive Mormon home. My [widowed] mother became inactive when I was around five years old. I lived with an aunt for some time around the age of 10, and was "baptized" in the Mormon church. When I returned to living with my mother, I became inactive again until the age of 15, when their missionaries were going door to door. My husband became Mormon then, and we were married. (Yes, I was 15 years old when I married my then 19 year old husband

) We were active for a year or so after that. It was a blessing that I was not exposed to the teachings of the Mormon religion any more than I was.

Something always felt wrong. I could never figure it out. I was so blind. Thanks be to God that I found TRUTH! I am home! This is it! Praise God!!!

My mother on the other hand, is struggling a little more with giving up and letting go. I think she is convinced of the intellectual aspect of truth in the Catholic Church, however she is still emotionally attached to the Mormon teachings that she was raised in. The brainwashing she received as a child and adolescent has made this a difficult journey for her. It's just going to take her some extra time.

TexanKnight · #11 Feb 22, '12, 6:25 pm

I did that and they held a church court. I did not attend, but got a letter saying I was excommunicated for "conduct unbecoming a member of the LDS Church"

RebeccaJ · #12 Feb 22, '12, 7:25 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by TexanKnight

I did that and they held a church court. I did not attend, but got a letter saying I was excommunicated for "conduct unbecoming a member of the LDS Church"

Converting to Jesus Christ = conduct unbecoming a member of the LDS Church?

belchers1 · #13 Feb 23, '12, 4:54 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by RebeccaJ

Converting to Jesus Christ = conduct unbecoming a member of the LDS Church?

Right on.

I'll update here in the future.

tundramom · #14 Feb 23, '12, 5:24 am

I've gone through the process 3 times.... and my name is still on the rolls. I figure I've done my part and since my name is there I get visits from the missionaries and I get to tell them my conversion story. It's all good! Welcome home!!!
Steph

PazzoGrande · #15 Feb 24, '12, 10:28 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by belchers1

My husband and I were previously Mormon, but we're not very active in the church, ever. We are coming into the Catholic Church this Easter!

A week or two ago, I received a phone call from our visiting teacher from the Mormon church. We spoke for a half an hour, about religion. (I was trying to plant a seed in his head

) He asked if I would like to have official excommunication, and I replied that it didn't really matter to me, as I don't hold the Mormon church as 'real', anyway. He said he'd inform the leadership, and told me that they may contact me. I said that I didn't mind.

Today, he called me back, and was not as friendly as the first time. He gave me the name of the bishop of the ward we'd be assigned to, and his home address. He told me we need to write a letter stating that we no longer wish to have communications with the church, and that both my husband and I need to sign it. He said it would be in the best interest of both parties.

Should I do this?

Part of me thinks that it's only costing me time, and a stamp, and it's not a big deal, but then I don't feel it's necessary. Why should I have to put anything in writing and sign it?

I don't know about your immediate question, but when you deal with them, it's a good idea to be as respectful to them as possible. So for example instead of saying "I don't believe your religion is real," it might help to say that "I learnt about the Catholic Church and found that it rang true; I thank you for the years that Mormonism welcomed me, but I found Catholicism and I cannot turn away from it" or something like that.

The reason is, because you are becoming a Catholic, in their minds you represent Catholicism. It's just a good idea if you leave a good impression, and who knows, maybe it would spark their conversions to Catholicism as well. Saying that their religion is a sham (even if it is) would give them a bitter taste against Catholics and they'll start biting back.

Welcome to the family!