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  #1  
Old Mar 27, '12, 10:35 am
FaithBuild18 FaithBuild18 is offline
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Default Homosexuality and RCIA

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He's also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is "This could be a step toward healing," but then I'm also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don't want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very "culturally hip" and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he'd end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?
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  #2  
Old Mar 27, '12, 11:56 am
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cradlecatholic5 cradlecatholic5 is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

I think you do just what we all do for people coming into our Catholic ... pray for them. No difference.
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  #3  
Old Mar 27, '12, 12:23 pm
Stumblesalot Stumblesalot is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by FaithBuild18 View Post
One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He's also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is "This could be a step toward healing," but then I'm also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don't want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very "culturally hip" and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he'd end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?


Hi,

I would suggest also that you pray for your friends. It does sound, however, as if you friend who is acting as sponsor may be providing misleading advice and presenting a poor example to your other friend. The fact that he is acting in a promiscuous fashion, and justifying it to both himself and RCIA candidate, suggests three possible scenarios to me.
1)His hormones are on overdrive and, while in his heart he knows such behaviour is unacceptable, he is succumbing to temptation.
2)He does not truly understand the moral implications and duties associated with his faith.
3)He is adopting a somewhat ‘lukewarm attitude’ toward his faith and is consequently guilty of the sin of presumption (i.e. “oh well, I shouldn’t really sleep with this girl, but it’s OK because I can just go to confession at the weekend” etc.)

In any case, a lot of such attitudes change drastically with age and life experience. In today’s world it is very difficult to be a young person of faith. I would perhaps, if the subject of faith comes up one evening when you are having a “lad’s night in”, maybe gently try to steer them in a more appropriate direction. In any case, simply pray for them and leave the rest to God. Hope this was helpful.

God bless
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  #4  
Old Mar 27, '12, 12:49 pm
sw85 sw85 is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by FaithBuild18 View Post
One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He's also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is "This could be a step toward healing," but then I'm also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don't want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very "culturally hip" and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he'd end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?
Given the terrible state of catechesis in this country it is very likely that your friend will never be told that homosexuality is against the teachings of the Church. It may well fall on you to correct this, if you are close enough to him that doing so wouldn't be presumptuous.

My concern is mainly that your friend, by confessing faith in the Church while practicing homosexuality, would receive the body of Christ unworthily, and so profane it.
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  #5  
Old Mar 27, '12, 12:58 pm
Dakota Roberts Dakota Roberts is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by FaithBuild18 View Post
One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He's also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is "This could be a step toward healing," but then I'm also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don't want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very "culturally hip" and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he'd end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?
You need a long talk with the sponsor.

Perhaps you should buy the pair a Catechism since that has pretty much everything
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  #6  
Old Mar 27, '12, 1:07 pm
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Havard Havard is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

What exactly do you mean when you say he's open/proud? Are you certain he's opposed to chastity?
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  #7  
Old Mar 27, '12, 6:12 pm
HaveCourage HaveCourage is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by FaithBuild18 View Post
One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He's also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is "This could be a step toward healing," but then I'm also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don't want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very "culturally hip" and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he'd end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?
I would say it is a misdirected step, for if he is "gay and proud", then he is first identifying as a homosexual person, above the identity of being a child of God. For that reason, RCIA is not the journey to healing. An examination of identity is the first step for him.

What do you do? Ask him if he is ready and willing to self-identify as a child of God first, instead of a homosexual person.
That is, if he is authentic in his journey, he will freely want to identify as a child of God FIRST, out of his love for Christ (above self). If he loves himself more than he loves God, then he will center his identity not on the designer of his soul, but only on a facet of his humanness (sexuality).
For a further explanation, PLEASE listen to my own testimony -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEH6iau7wkM

Please share it with other people who are committed to the faith, although this is possibly not what your roomie pal needs to hear at this time. But you do need to challenge him on the matter of identity.
He has the choice to identify as a "child of God, with homosexual attraction", which places his identity in Christ, while at the same time, not denying the reality of his attractions.

God Bless and PRAY PRAY PRAY
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  #8  
Old Mar 27, '12, 6:29 pm
Corpus Cristi Corpus Cristi is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by cradlecatholic5 View Post
I think you do just what we all do for people coming into our Catholic ... pray for them. No difference.
This.
__________________
If I'm not in a state of grace, I pray the lord to put me there, and If I am in a state of grace, then I pray the lord to keep me there.

~St. Joan of Arc
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  #9  
Old Mar 27, '12, 6:31 pm
ssa fellow ssa fellow is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by HaveCourage View Post
I would say it is a misdirected step, for if he is "gay and proud", then he is first identifying as a homosexual person, above the identity of being a child of God. For that reason, RCIA is not the journey to healing. An examination of identity is the first step for him.

God Bless and PRAY PRAY PRAY
Have you broached this topic with either of your 2 roommates yet?

If you haven't, I'd suggest telling whoever is leading the RCIA classes. They'll probably know how to deal with it. If they don't want to individually confront him about it, then maybe they can just include the Church's teaching at some point in RCIA. Also... isn't RCIA ending soon?
If you feel this person isn't ready to be Confirmed then definitely make your concerns known to your priest!!!

When people join the Catholic Church the idea is they have a good understanding of what the Church teaches and agree with the teachings. That's why Vatican II brought RCIA back from antiquity. Certainly you can join the Church and disagree with something if your attitude is that you'll try to conform to whatever teaching over time. Many Protestants have said they still had hangups about _____, but didn't let that stop them from converting. It would be wrong to enter into the Church with a hard heart or obstinately "I disagree with this Church teaching, and I will NEVER change my belief, I think the Church is wrong on this". As opposed to "Even though I don't agree on this issue, maybe I'll understand the Catholic teaching after prayer and being Confrimed, asking a priest, etc."

All that being said, we are all called to identify as children/ servants of God first like Paul did. Even a heterosexual shouldn't say: Well I'm proud to be straight, and also I'm Catholic.

We should all say "I'm proud to be Catholic", and if you're SSA you could say "I'm Catholic, gay and committed to celibacy, and proud of it"
__________________
Gays should be married to the Bride of Christ.
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  #10  
Old Mar 27, '12, 10:15 pm
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michelleds michelleds is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

You've gotten good advice so far. You're the only one who knows your relationship with (1) the catechist; (2) the sponsor; and (3) your priest.

This close to Easter, I'd be calling for an appointment with my priest about this situation.
__________________
"The enemy held fast my will, and had made of it a chain, and had bound me tight with it. For out of the perverse will came lust, and the service of lust ended in habit, and habit, not resisted, became necessity." St. Augustine Confessions
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  #11  
Old Mar 28, '12, 12:36 pm
FaithBuild18 FaithBuild18 is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Thank you everyone for your responses. I think I'm going to try to talk to the sponsor first, since I know him better. I'm pretty nervous. I don't talk a lot so I will be out of my comfort zone.
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  #12  
Old Mar 28, '12, 10:25 pm
VanWA VanWA is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Healing? He's not sick, he's as God made him.

The bible is FULL of contradictions, but Christ's words are not. Ignore the mistranslations of the OT and ask yourself this: Who would CHOOSE to be a persecuted minority?
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  #13  
Old Mar 28, '12, 10:40 pm
Dakota Roberts Dakota Roberts is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by VanWA View Post
Healing? He's not sick, he's as God made him.

The bible is FULL of contradictions, but Christ's words are not. Ignore the mistranslations of the OT and ask yourself this: Who would CHOOSE to be a persecuted minority?
All inherently sterile acts are intrinsically disordered. It doesn't make him a bad person, it doesn't make him a broken person (anymore than we all are), but it does mean that his attractions are disordered insofar as all desires for acts intrinsically closed to life are disordered.
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  #14  
Old Mar 28, '12, 10:51 pm
VanWA VanWA is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

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Originally Posted by Dakota Roberts View Post
All inherently sterile acts are intrinsically disordered. It doesn't make him a bad person, it doesn't make him a broken person (anymore than we all are), but it does mean that his attractions are disordered insofar as all desires for acts intrinsically closed to life are disordered.
It's nothing but a biological function. The male body does not tolerate a buildup of semen, so discharge, whether voluntary (masturbation) or involuntary as in 'wet dreams,' is going to happen, just like women's menstrual cycles. And if God has seen fit to have many of us alone and lonely, then it's all the more likely. The sin of lust is done long before any sort of physiological response, that's in the mind.
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  #15  
Old Mar 28, '12, 10:59 pm
HaveCourage HaveCourage is offline
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Default Re: Homosexuality and RCIA

Quote:
Originally Posted by ssa fellow View Post
Have you broached this topic with either of your 2 roommates yet?

If you haven't, I'd suggest telling whoever is leading the RCIA classes. They'll probably know how to deal with it. If they don't want to individually confront him about it, then maybe they can just include the Church's teaching at some point in RCIA. Also... isn't RCIA ending soon?
If you feel this person isn't ready to be Confirmed then definitely make your concerns known to your priest!!!

When people join the Catholic Church the idea is they have a good understanding of what the Church teaches and agree with the teachings. That's why Vatican II brought RCIA back from antiquity. Certainly you can join the Church and disagree with something if your attitude is that you'll try to conform to whatever teaching over time. Many Protestants have said they still had hangups about _____, but didn't let that stop them from converting. It would be wrong to enter into the Church with a hard heart or obstinately "I disagree with this Church teaching, and I will NEVER change my belief, I think the Church is wrong on this". As opposed to "Even though I don't agree on this issue, maybe I'll understand the Catholic teaching after prayer and being Confrimed, asking a priest, etc."

All that being said, we are all called to identify as children/ servants of God first like Paul did. Even a heterosexual shouldn't say: Well I'm proud to be straight, and also I'm Catholic.

We should all say "I'm proud to be Catholic", and if you're SSA you could say "I'm Catholic, gay and committed to celibacy, and proud of it"
You still have to be careful! You are not clarifying the use of the word Gay when you used it.
Saying "gay people" embeds a huge flaw (an error). You do not define whether a person is homosexually attracted, or has subscribed to the gay life-identity. One is no choice, and one is choice. If you use the word "gay" in an unclarified sense, you are contributing to the continued misunderstanding of the whole topic. The words "homosexual", "gay", "lesbian", and so forth, can never be used alone without further clarifiers, for they confuse two contradictory items; choice and NOT choice.

Regardless, I am glad for all SSA people who come to love the Lord FIRST above all else (for it draws them to identify with the Lord first too).
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