Australian church says women are “too choosy,” should wed earlier

kelvinf · #1 May 9, '12, 12:13 am

Women should marry earlier and not be too picky to avoid an Aussie man drought, the Catholic Church has warned.

Australia is experiencing a huge decline in the number of available men, with the church telling women they should also forget about living with their partners before tying the knot.

Statistics have revealed that there are dramatically fewer eligible blokes than single women aged 25 to 34.

The dire outlook has been backed by Federal Liberal MP Kevin Andrews, who is researching changes in marriage and families in Australia and has suggested the swing towards de facto partnerships wasn’t helping.

But Fr Tony Kerin, episcopal vicar for justice and social service in the Archdiocese of Melbourne, said today’s women wanted the best of both worlds.

“Are women getting too choosy? I’d say yes,” Fr Kerin, speaking on behalf of the archdiocese, said.
“I think many are setting aside their aspirations for later, but by the time they get around to it, they’ve missed their chance. In trying to have it all, they end up missing out.”
Fr Kerin said the rate of marriage in Australia had halved despite nearly four in five people still wanting to settle down.

“For many, it remains an unattainable dream,” he said.
Statistics show that 78 per cent of Australian couples now lived together before they married.

But Fr Kerin said de facto relationships were twice as likely to break down compared with couples who had not lived together.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/deacons...d-wed-earlier/

I think so. But this is also true for some men. We are always focusing on Mr. or Mrs. Right and tend to miss other opportunities.

Pfaffenhoffen · #2 May 9, '12, 12:41 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by kelvinf

Women should marry earlier and not be too picky to avoid an Aussie man drought, the Catholic Church has warned.

Australia is experiencing a huge decline in the number of available men, with the church telling women they should also forget about living with their partners before tying the knot.

Statistics have revealed that there are dramatically fewer eligible blokes than single women aged 25 to 34.

The dire outlook has been backed by Federal Liberal MP Kevin Andrews, who is researching changes in marriage and families in Australia and has suggested the swing towards de facto partnerships wasn’t helping.

But Fr Tony Kerin, episcopal vicar for justice and social service in the Archdiocese of Melbourne, said today’s women wanted the best of both worlds.

“Are women getting too choosy? I’d say yes,” Fr Kerin, speaking on behalf of the archdiocese, said.
“I think many are setting aside their aspirations for later, but by the time they get around to it, they’ve missed their chance. In trying to have it all, they end up missing out.”
Fr Kerin said the rate of marriage in Australia had halved despite nearly four in five people still wanting to settle down.

“For many, it remains an unattainable dream,” he said.
Statistics show that 78 per cent of Australian couples now lived together before they married.

But Fr Kerin said de facto relationships were twice as likely to break down compared with couples who had not lived together.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/deacons...d-wed-earlier/

I think so. But this is also true for some men. We are always focusing on Mr. or Mrs. Right and tend to miss other opportunities.

I laughed to death with Dr. Phil Program the other day. No wonder women are choosy.
Woman who wanted to marry and found no man had lists of qualities that they demanded. Besides demanding good abs when they did not put a foot in the gym there was one that struck me.
Dr. Phil read and list and pointed aloud one: "knows how to swim".
I laughed to death....

**LilyM** · #3 May 9, '12, 12:58 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pfaffenhoffen

I laughed to death with Dr. Phil Program the other day. No wonder women are choosy.
Woman who wanted to marry and found no man had lists of qualities that they demanded. Besides demanding good abs when they did not put a foot in the gym there was one that struck me.
Dr. Phil read and list and pointed aloud one: "knows how to swim".
I laughed to death....

Then there are those of us women whose lists include 'good heart, makes me laugh' and not much else ... whose male acquaintances all but totally ignore them in favour of the stereotypical very young 6ft tall blonde blue-eyed model-looking gals.

A lot of men are every bit as fussy in their own ways

DaveBj · #4 May 9, '12, 3:20 am

I'm reminded of a line I heard in a movie decades ago, to the effect that many women are so intent on finding Mr. Right that they aren't doing anything about becoming some man's Ms Right.

Of course, the same thing could be said about some men.

Crescentinus · #5 May 9, '12, 3:28 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by LilyM

Then there are those of us women whose lists include 'good heart, makes me laugh' and not much else ... whose male acquaintances all but totally ignore them in favour of the stereotypical very young 6ft tall blonde blue-eyed model-looking gals.

A lot of men are every bit as fussy in their own ways

Sadly, it's not just a Western problem. Even here in the Far East, it's a very serious problem. D:

ivebeenshown · #6 May 9, '12, 8:24 am

If I could do it again I would pick a woman with strong Catholic convictions and humor that complements mine.

My beautiful wife already has that humor and we are growing in our convictions and in the quantity/quality of our family. So I really wouldn't want to do it again. Thank you Jesus!

But I would recommend that for any unmarried Catholic seeking marriage. Find a partner who complements your personality/humor and has strong Catholic faith. That is what matters.

BettyBoop416 · #7 May 9, '12, 2:41 pm

The Church teaches that we get but one shot at marriage - no do-overs. And now the Church is saying not to be "too picky" when making this supposedly life-long choice?

This is just absurd.

**Dale_M** · #8 May 9, '12, 2:45 pm

I think we shouldn't judge what Fr. Kerin said until we read his comments in context.

I suspect the newspapers are selecting his comments to make them seem outrageous. Its a known tactic for driving sales, as well as views to a news website.

Does anyone have a link to his full interview or statement?

Pax2u · #9 May 9, '12, 2:49 pm

Have you ever watched the show "House Hunters"? When I listen to those spoiled young couples go on about how "the kitchen isn't big enough to entertain" or "I must have granite countertops" or "What??? No double sinks in the bathrooms?" I'm surprised that any of them are married LOL!!!

I think people should be less picky about their houses, and more picky about their spouses. Heh, that sounds like a song.

Catholic1954 · #10 May 9, '12, 6:24 pm

If I am gong to be sharing a bathroom with the same person for the next 65 years, you bet I am going to be PICKY!!!

alexand · #11 May 9, '12, 7:06 pm

Yes,it's really not just a Western problem.

AthenaC · #12 May 14, '12, 6:03 am

Women don't become "too picky" in a vacuum. Men need to step it up. Women have every right to be picky, especially when you consider that in the traditional model of marriage where women are primarily responsible for child-rearing, the man can leave her and the children homeless and destitute on a whim. And that can happen even when you are very picky, because the bottom line is that no one knows for sure what choices people will make in the future.

Farsight001 · #13 May 14, '12, 7:12 am

Quote:

Originally Posted by kelvinf

Women should marry earlier and not be too picky to avoid an Aussie man drought, the Catholic Church has warned.

Australia is experiencing a huge decline in the number of available men, with the church telling women they should also forget about living with their partners before tying the knot.

Statistics have revealed that there are dramatically fewer eligible blokes than single women aged 25 to 34.

The dire outlook has been backed by Federal Liberal MP Kevin Andrews, who is researching changes in marriage and families in Australia and has suggested the swing towards de facto partnerships wasn’t helping.

But Fr Tony Kerin, episcopal vicar for justice and social service in the Archdiocese of Melbourne, said today’s women wanted the best of both worlds.

“Are women getting too choosy? I’d say yes,” Fr Kerin, speaking on behalf of the archdiocese, said.
“I think many are setting aside their aspirations for later, but by the time they get around to it, they’ve missed their chance. In trying to have it all, they end up missing out.”
Fr Kerin said the rate of marriage in Australia had halved despite nearly four in five people still wanting to settle down.

“For many, it remains an unattainable dream,” he said.
Statistics show that 78 per cent of Australian couples now lived together before they married.

But Fr Kerin said de facto relationships were twice as likely to break down compared with couples who had not lived together.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/deacons...d-wed-earlier/

I think so. But this is also true for some men. We are always focusing on Mr. or Mrs. Right and tend to miss other opportunities.

In my experience, the opposite is true. The men and women around me seem a tad needy, for lack of a better word, in regards to a relationship, so they'll date the first person that sticks out to them without first thinking seriously or praying about it.

VienneseWaltz · #14 May 25, '12, 10:47 pm

I have heard the same, but about men, don't know where. I am one of them and not proud of it!

VienneseWaltz · #15 May 25, '12, 11:01 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by pax2u

have you ever watched the show "house hunters"? When i listen to those spoiled young couples go on about how "the kitchen isn't big enough to entertain" or "i must have granite countertops" or "what??? No double sinks in the bathrooms?" i'm surprised that any of them are married lol!!!

:d
lol