Seeking advice on possibly joining the church

phatrat1982 · #1 Jun 9, '12, 5:03 pm

I am not sure if this is the exact forum for this type of thread if it is not please feel free to move it. I am new here and there are so many topics to read through I just wanted to stop reading for a while and get my questions asked if that is ok.

I won't go into details on who I am or how I got here, not at the moment anyways. But for the most part I have felt God leading me to at questions about the Catholic church where before I would have never even considered doing so. I was raised mostly baptist and the last church I attended regularly was very anti-catholic. So I have a history of being anti catholic myself. I have friends who "came out of" the catholic church and whose testimony even moved me to myself crusade for that very thing. I must admit I always felt it was wrong to condemn any Christian because of their churches fallacies and even before going to that church I was at, I always felt that Catholics were just as christian as I was, maybe even more so in some ways or at least was how I felt. Anyways I have so many questions but I also have genuine concerns over certain issues that I have yet to resolve.

I am not expecting anyone to have concrete answers on doctrines and the like, even I have questions about certain things and I have been reading the Bible since I was about 10 or so and well I am 30 now.

What I am here for is just to ask questions and seek advice. I would like to actually go to a church and meet with a priest or bishop or whatever it is whoever it is I would meet with in person but I have never been to a catholic church so I don't know how it works. most churches I have gone to have certain hours someone is available and I can't find anything in the local directories or online as to how to find out who to talk to and since I am new to this I felt like maybe I should take it one step at a time.

If I wanted to speak with a person of authority how easy is it to do so and what is the protocol, like do I need an appointment, should I just go down to the local church and walk in, is there a special place to go to ask questions, or how should I move forward?

Second and this is the big one, I come from such an anti catholic family just telling my mom that I was asking questions about the catholic church well nearly got me all worried I was going to start a holy war. My sisters were a little more understanding and she didn't say anything out right against it well how can she, anyways she said she respected my finding what is right for me, but I mostly fear my dad would be less welcoming. I have not made any decisions yet I am still asking questions but I am also willing to be obedient to God even if it means causing a rift with my own family, unless that can be avoided.

I was always under the belief that all Christians who believed in the Blood of the Lamb and the Saving Grace who had faith would be saved. I also always felt that it didn't matter where you went as long as you went to worship God and fellowship with other believers. I know God is powerful and I can do all things through Christ and my faith is as strong as ever, I am recently on a quest to get right with God and no matter what I do I can not feel right unless I am attending the right church and well so far I have not found that church and it occurred to me there was one church I was neglecting all along.

**1ke** · #2 Jun 9, '12, 5:12 pm

Hello and welcome.

I would suggest you make an appointment to talk to either the pastor or a deacon (if the local parish has a deacon). Making an appointment sounds very formal, but priests tend to be on the go a lot, with meetings, visits to the sick, etc. So, just dropping by might leave you disappointed if no one is there that can speak to you at that time.

Another option would be to talk to whoever in that parish coordinates RCIA. RCIA is the process by which one joins the Church. RCIA typically runs in a school year type fashion, Sept - May. But the person coordinating it should be able to talk to you any time. RCIA Is the right place to lean the fundamentals of what the Church teaches, how we live and worship as Catholics, and whether you want to enter a formal process to join the Church. The first part of RCIA is called "inquiry" and it is just that-- no obligation or pressure to join the church. I know one man who stayed in the inquiry phase for 3 years (he was a Hindu and had LOTS to learn and question before deciding he wanted to become a Christian).

snarflemike · #3 Jun 9, '12, 5:13 pm

Hi and welcome,

I'd suggest calling a local parish and telling them what you want to do, and see what they offer. Generally priests are too busy to just walk in on. There's also this forum, of course, and the Coming Home forum as well.

As to your anti-Catholic family, boy do we see that a lot. Some of us even take it as evidence that the Catholic Church is the true Church.

You're quite right that many Christians who say that salvation just requires belief and repentance, will add the caveat "and not being Catholic!" It's a mystery. Read the lives of the Catholic saints and you will find people who loved God immensely, trusted him totally, and poured out their lives seeking to do his will. Hard to find any objective reason to deny they were Christians.

Most of all, seek the truth at all costs, and always walk in the footsteps of Christ. If your family cannot accept that, then that is their loss.

phatrat1982 · #4 Jun 9, '12, 5:21 pm

I guess it is taking that first step. Part of what makes me hesitant is not because my family might disown me or whatever, it is because since going back to school I have had to move back home, so it makes me nervous what they would do if I came out and said I stopped going to their church to talk to a catholic priest.

My next question is then how would I make said appointment? Do I need to go down to the church, call them on the phone or how does it work? I am new to this area so I don't even know where their church is. I have never been to one but I can understand how the priests and deacons or whatever you call them would be busy, the church I was in for so long had my dad as a deacon and their primary purpose was to take the load off the pastors.

The reasons why I am unsure how to proceed is most churches I have been to if the pastor is busy they usually have office hours or a secretary on staff to talk to would a catholic church also have someone present if I went down in person to make an appointment? And how do I look up where the local church is located aside from driving around? I looked online but google had so many listings I was not sure where to start.

CleverUserName · #5 Jun 9, '12, 5:34 pm

Yes, call the nearest Catholic church and ask to make an appointment to talk with the Priest.

I wish more people were like you.

I wish more people who had questions about the Catholic faith took the time to inquire of a Catholic priest, rather than just taking the anti-Catholic rhetoric that goes around in other denominations. Good on ya for that.

As for rejection/disapproval from your family..... well I would simply ask them to trust your judgment and respect your decision to inquire about the church. If you normally share things with your family, then I would do this, too: As you learn about the Catholic Church, namely the position on so many common points of attack, go home and say "Hey guess what I learned about the Pope, Mom...." and share it with her. "Did you know that confessing to a priest is in the Bible?".... You won't come off as preaching, but just sharing what you're discovering. If you google Catholic Apologetics, you'll find a lot of good learning in advance for that sort of thing.

If it is true, you could also simply say that God has moved your heart to look into the Catholic Church. Who would argue with Him?

Good luck to you......and you will be in my prayers.

phatrat1982 · #6 Jun 9, '12, 5:37 pm

What makes it really especially hard for me was having been so anti catholic I had catholic friends I basically flat out told them they were going to hell. There is a danger I always felt in that because of the part where Jesus scolded the Pharisees for that same thing, calling the works of the holy spirit the works of the devil and he called that the one thing he would not forgive, so it was one of those things I wish I had been more careful of. I never called anyone in the church the devil or devil worshipers but I was always quick to jump on the great whore debate.

Aggies08 · #7 Jun 9, '12, 5:46 pm

Howdy!

It would be easiest to call a local church and make an apt to speak with the priest/pastor. If you are uncomfortable with calling him Fr. Name, you can also go with Reverend Name. Some use their first name (Father/Rev Bob), and some their last (Father Smith). You can ask the receptionist what he goes by, or just wait for him to introduce himself

Continue to read your bible and pray to the Holy Spirit! All God asks is that we do our very best to follow where he leads us... but all is life-consuming. In the words of the Angel to Mary, Do Not Be Afraid!

and-

"There are not a hundred people in America who hate the Catholic Church. There are millions of people who hate what they wrongly believe to be the Catholic Church — which is, of course, quite a different thing." Fulton J. Sheen, who you can look up on Youtube, if you like!

phatrat1982 · #8 Jun 9, '12, 6:07 pm

ok last question for now, on this subject. Would there be someone there tomorrow, Sunday, or should I wait till Monday to make a call? It is getting late enough now I wouldn't bother tonight.

Aggies08 · #9 Jun 9, '12, 6:22 pm

I would think so, but perhaps only around the Mass times (since it's Sunday)- look the parish up online, and they will probably have hours and phone numbers listed

. That definitely could vary from church to church!

maltmom · #10 Jun 9, '12, 6:53 pm

Welcome!!!

Call several churches in your immediate area. You can also go to Mass and after Mass you can mention to the Priest and/or Deacon (if there is one) that you would like to make an appointment to discuss joining the church. Not all Priests stand at the door to great everyone. Some churches have ushers. Speak to them if the Priest nor the Deacon is available. They'll be happy to help you.

Come back and let us know how it goes. We are here to pray for you, answer your questions and support you in anyway we can.

kevinerose · #11 Jun 9, '12, 7:02 pm

Go to mass tomorrow morning. Grab a bulletin and you fill find in there the phone numbers and office hours. If your priest is hard to find after mass or you aren't able to figure out who the ushers are, at least you will have the bulletin to go by.
And your church's website is usually easy to find on google if you want to check there. type in "your city and catholic church" and you should find it.

Good luck!

snarflemike · #12 Jun 9, '12, 7:07 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by phatrat1982

ok last question for now, on this subject. Would there be someone there tomorrow, Sunday, or should I wait till Monday to make a call? It is getting late enough now I wouldn't bother tonight.

Sunday's a pretty busy day at any Catholic Church. Hang out with us for the weekend and make the call on Monday.

zz912 · #13 Jun 9, '12, 7:15 pm

Hope I can be of some help, coming from a Baptist background myself (although we weren't of the anti-Catholic variety).

1. http://www.thecatholicdirectory.com/

This website should help you find parishes near you, plus lists Mass times, has bulletins, and contact information.

2. Sundays are busy, they will probably have 3-4 Masses at least, and maybe some other activities. There may or may not be anyone in the office. You are welcome to attend a Mass and get a feel for the parish, and even introduce yourself to the Father if possible, although I doubt he would have more than a minute or two to chat, as all the other parishioners will be saying hello as well. I would strongly suggest calling the office on Monday and explaining to them who you are, your situation, and tell them you have questions/concerns. See about setting up a time to meet with a Deacon or Priest.

3. If you do go to Mass, you can participate as much as you wish, except for one thing. The Catholic Church practices "closed" Communion, and only Catholics who are in a state of grace may recieve Communion (Eucharist). The reasons for this are several, one major one being where St. Paul warns against those who do not discern the Body and Blood could be eating and drinking judgement on themselves. The Church wants to protect you and others from doing this out of ignorance. If you do attend a Mass, when it comes time for Communion, just remain in the pew and let the others by.

4. www.scborromeo.org/ccc.htm
This is a link to the Catechism of the Catholic Church. This is the official teachings of the Church. It is helpful when trying to come to grips with different teachings and learning about the Church.

Feel free to throw out any questions you may have or concerns. This message board is a wealth of expertise and experience. Any question you may have has already been asked, and eveyrone is cheerful to answer honest and respectful questions.

God bless on your journey!

**po18guy** · #14 Jun 9, '12, 8:17 pm

Welcome! You will end up where the Lord desires you to be, since you have begun your journey with the only necessary piece of equipment: an open heart.

I would suggest that you do a little reading on the faith. A great introduction, and not bad to follow up with, is Catholicism for Dummies. I learn something each time I read my copy.

Here is a website that offers information and other resources.

As well, we are always here as a resource.

phatrat1982 · #15 Jun 9, '12, 8:25 pm

I will check out those websites because I have already looked online to find the local church, I found a listing with a picture of the church and a phone number no mention of times or location but I will figure it out.