Homeschooling dad dilemma

[SonCatcher]

Some years ago, my wife and I investigated homeschooling for our children. My wife wasn't particularly comfortable with it due to her own lack of education (she is an immigrant and only had a few years of formal education in a system that doesn't even match the quality of the American public school system).

Due to her discomfort, we tried first to enroll our son in Catholic school. They wanted to defer his entry a year so we decided to go ahead with homeschooling him to test the waters, figuring that he could at least enter the following year if it wasn't working out.

Our son has now completed 2 years of homeschooling and loves it; our daughter is rapidly approaching formal school age; and my wife is at her wits' end. DW now enjoys the concept of homeschooling (especially vs the public system) but her insecurity and the time she takes preparing are taking their toll. (she regularly stays up past midnight preparing lessons).

What are some things that a husband and father could do to lighten the load? I am blessed with a regular schedule but cannot stay up late on the lessons. My evenings usually involve assisting DS with piano practice and taking care of the kids so DW can prepare the upcoming lessons.

[PoorKnight]

As a father of a Homeschooling family, let me say, I can relate!

It's Great you guys are home schooling.

One thing to realize is you will NEVER help your wife to the point that she won't be tearing her hair out once-in-a-while. It happens to the best teachers in schools too.

A few things that MAY help.

1) Ask her if there's a subject that she feels she is least able to teach. For my wife it's Math. It works out for us that I'm good with numbers so I teach Math 2 or 3 days a week when I get home from work. If she needs you to take 2 subjects, just do a 1/2 hour of one of the subjects every-other-day (with the other being on the off-day obviously) and that will take a HUGE load off her.

2) Get in touch with other homeschoolers ESPECIALLY those who have done it for a while. This happened, providentially, just as my wife was about to give-up. A well-seasoned homeschooling mom told her to stop worring about doing everything, everyday. Just go through the book - she can learn at the same time the kids do (happens to us all the time and it's great to share that experience with them) - and when you get done with it, go on to the next book up. Don't try to be a formal school at home. Hit the basic subjects (Faith, Math, Reading, Writing) at least once-a-week and then fill in with stuff the kids want to learn. Notice I didn't list History and Science? If you teach your kids to love Reading, They'll teach themselves! That's not saying we don't do History and Science. (Church History is one of my kids favorite topics), but the three 'R's are the most important.

3) There are other styles of homeschooling that "do it all yourself". There are online Schools that will do a lot of the work for you - you pay more though - but it may take the prep time off.

4) Check out this book: "The Catholic Homeschool Companion". My wife LOVES it. It's full of articles on how to better homeschool your children. It also has about 50+ different homeschool curriculum (curriculi, curricula, curriculums?) in the back to check out. It could be, as it was with my wife, that the curiculum you're using has you doing a TON of unnecessary prep time. A different curriculum MAY help that too.

We're probably going to be doing "Catholic Herritage Curriculum" (just search that) but we've heard very good things about Seton Home Study School which is one of those on-line schools vs CHC which is a curriculum.

Hope this helps, the first year is the hardest, the next gets easier!

God Bless you for wanting the best for your children!

[lerapt78]

Hi OP. I can't offer any better advice than the gentleman above, but I wanted to add that maybe your wife could look up care plans on the internet and use them as a template for some of her sessions. Congratulations to the both of you on taking up this effort, and bless you for being a considerate husband.

[Aggies08]

Can you be up with the kids in the morning so she can sleep a little later? Even 30m may make a difference.

[SonCatcher]

Originally Posted by Aggies08

Can you be up with the kids in the morning so she can sleep a little later? Even 30m may make a difference.

She prefers I maximize evening time

[airforcefamily]

Maybe try out a curriculum that includes lessons that are already prepared? There are some out there that go as far as giving a script to read and others offer dvd lessons that the kids can watch. Even swapping out a few subjects for pre-prepped lessons can relive a lot of the time burden.

It wouldn't work for a preschool-1st grader but once they're reading fluently teaching textbooks can help the kids learn on their own (there are others that are not technically teaching textbooks but have a similar style).

[Sillara]

Originally Posted by airforcefamily

Maybe try out a curriculum that includes lessons that are already prepared? There are some out there that go as far as giving a script to read and others offer dvd lessons that the kids can watch. Even swapping out a few subjects for pre-prepped lessons can relive a lot of the time burden.

It wouldn't work for a preschool-1st grader but once they're reading fluently teaching textbooks can help the kids learn on their own (there are others that are not technically teaching textbooks but have a similar style).

This.

I have six children, and I homeschool the three oldest ones. #4 should start kindergarten next spring. My oldest started high school this year, so I have been doing this for a while. I highly recommend finding a "canned" curriculum if the preparation is getting to be a lot for your wife. The one caveat I have about a canned curriculum (which is what I used for several years and still use as much as possible, due to my own work schedule as an editor) is not to stress if you don't follow everything exactly. I used to cut down on the number of book reports my curriculum called for. I required they read the books, but I didn't require the 20 book reports per school year that the program did.

Anyway, having the lessons already prepared helps A LOT.

[HouseArrest]

I agree with the others to look at purchasing a curriculum.

Some of the most popular and well known Catholic curriculums are Catholic Heritage Curricula, Kolbe Academy, Mother of Divine Grace Homeschool, Seton Homeschool, Saint Thomas Aquinas Academy, Our Lady of the Rosary, Our Lady of Victory, and more.

Go to www.catholichomeschool.org. All of the above plus more will be listed with links. After you visit each homepage, you will probably get a feel for which one fits your family's style and educational philosophy.

They range in price, with most of them offering various levels of involvement from the provider. I know for Mother of Divine Grace, a family can choose Teacher Assisted courses (though they are expensive!) that have a weekly online or telephone conference with the student for keeping him/her on track (although that doesn't seem to be an issue since your son is thriving!).

Some considerations you may not think of when deciding are:
Does the provider use textbooks or original texts? (original can be purchased used or borrowed from the library)

Does the provider discourage selling of their plans? (some don't, they rely on course plan sales to fund their organization, thus used plans are not available)

Does the site have a forum for support?

Finally - go to a homeschool conference if at all possible. A lot of these providers set up booths and have their materials available to look through, and a representative for answering questions.

Good luck!

[papaececi]

Originally Posted by SonCatcher

What are some things that a husband and father could do to lighten the load?

This is thoughtful of you.

We are hoping to homeschool but we aren't doing it yet, so I can only speak to some general things that my husband does that help when I need extra time. You could prepare a simple crock pot meal in the morning so she won't have to worry about dinner. We have a chore schedule for everyday of the week and there are some chores my husband is comfortable doing. Knowing what has to be done during that particular day makes it easy for him to know how to help. Sometimes I sort laundry in the basement and leave it in piles. He throws it in/rotates it to the dryer, folds.

[SonCatcher]

Thank you all for your kind suggestions. We will work on a few of them (along with a few of our own) and see how it goes from there.