Why Do You Reveal Your "Gay" Friend or Family Members Sexual Orientation?

[peace2u2]

I find it annoying when friends or family tell me about a friend or family member of theirs and then inform me that "oh, and their gay".

I didn't even ask and they reveal such personal information. I think its weird.

So, why do people think its necessary to inform others of their friends sexual orientation?Maybe, their embarrased about their friend or family member, or maybe they are trying to figure out our views on homosexuality?

And, how come when they talk of their straight friends they don't say, and by the way, "their straight?"

I wonder if their gay friends are aware of this? Don't you think they might even be offended that your sharing such personal information about them?

[Regular Atheist]

You missed an option out. It's a way to identify people. I can say, "Oh, he's the gay one!" and you'll immediatly know who it is I'm talking about, as I told you he's gay earlier. People do the same thing with black folk, or people of certain religions. That's the main reason. In some cases it could be the first option, if I think you could be a rabid homophobe, but generally if I had such suspicions I'd just ask and probably wouldn't bother concealing it - after all, it's a subject I enjoy debating.

So, no, it's nothing to do with us "liberals" trying to enforce any kind of "Homosexual Agenda".

[EasterJoy]

I generally wouldn't, not unless the family member had brought their "significant other", or I thought you were likely to ask directly whether a male family member had a girl friend or a female family member had a boyfriend. If a gay family member was a bit of minefield on some topic, such as marriage, I'd let you know that before you stumbled unknowingly into that hornet's nest.

If the topic was not likely to come up were you to talk to the family member or acquaintance directly, I wouldn't feel any need to give you a heads up. One's sexual orientation doesn't make one into a zoo animals, one way or the other, so people don't need that to be identified for idle reasons.

Still, when one is identified as gay while others aren't, that's a little like identifying someone as being left-handed instead of right-handed. The heterosexual orientation is so much more common that it does not usually need to be pointed out. (If a heterosexual guy had stereotypical gay mannerisms but was going to hit on every woman he hadn't met yet, though, again: that's something you would warn a friend about.)

[Do Good Then Go]

Most people are not gay, and attitudes and conversations tend to run along the lines of assuming that everyone is heterosexual.

That's fine and most of the time there's no need at all to mention someone's sexuality. But when conversations with friends start getting into who has met a nice young man/woman, who is getting married, or who is having children (as conversations with friends and even acquaintances tend to go from time to time), inevitably someone is going to ask why my son isn't married yet, is there any sign of a girl on the horizon, comment that they don't recall that he's ever had a serious girlfriend, mention that they know a nice girl he might like to meet, and so on.

At a certain point it becomes easier and more truthful to say "he's gay" than keep deflecting questions.

Other people would no doubt have other reasons but it's not a sin to be gay, and it's not something that must be kept hidden and never revealed.

Unfortunately there are also people who tend to make off colour jokes or unpleasant and untruthful remarks about gay people just in general conversation, it's not that uncommon. Simply saying that I don't appreciate comments like that isn't always effective in stopping it.

[Phemie]

If I identify my brother as 'gay' to my friends, it's to explain certain things that make no sense otherwise. I don't have to do that with my straight relatives or friends. By making sure they know my brother or other relatives & friends are gay, I avoid questions and embarrassing situations that might arise if they didn't know.

[andrewstx]

I did not vote, you don't havea "none of anyones business" option. It is really immaterial to me. Ihave no interest in homosex, but I don't shun people either.

[andrewstx]

I see that none else has voted too, not alone.

[peace2u2]

Thank you to all who posted for your insight.

[kbwall]

When I introduce my lesbian friend to people, I never mention that she's gay. It's just not an issue. Well, with the exception of when I introduced her to my girlfriend, but that was more to reassure her, since otherwise me spending so much time with a straight girl may have raised her eyebrow.