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  #1  
Old Nov 8, '05, 8:48 pm
Inkitcresteds Inkitcresteds is offline
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Question What happens at a marriage blessing??

Hello everyone
I am new to the forum and never did find just what I was looking for so I thought I would just post a question. My husband and I are having our marriage blessed on Friday, what can I expect? I have no idea what the priest is going to do or how long it will take. What should I wear? My new priest is so busy with such a large congragation I never did find out all the details...just to be there at 6pm. Can anyone help me???

Thank You
Inkits
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  #2  
Old Nov 8, '05, 9:52 pm
Courtneyjo Courtneyjo is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

This is how it was for us. At Mass after the homily, the priest called us up near the altar. He stood in the middle and we recited vows after him. He blessed the rings, and my husband and I slipped them on each other. We turned and faced the congregation and he presented us as "Mr. and Mrs." to them. It was very lovely.

Since it was a weekday morning Mass, my husband wore slacks and a sports coat and I wore a nice flowery Sunday-type dress and low heels. You may want to get a special dress but I didn't see the point for myself.

I am so happy for you. You and your husband will have a much deeper love for each other after the ceremony.

Why not give Father a phone call just to iron out the details?
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  #3  
Old Nov 8, '05, 9:55 pm
GeorgeSutton GeorgeSutton is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Courtneyjo
This is how it was for us. At Mass after the homily, the priest called us up near the altar. He stood in the middle and we recited vows after him. He blessed the rings, and my husband and I slipped them on each other. We turned and faced the congregation and he presented us as "Mr. and Mrs." to them. It was very lovely.

Since it was a weekday morning Mass, my husband wore slacks and a sports coat and I wore a nice flowery Sunday-type dress and low heels. You may want to get a special dress but I didn't see the point for myself.

I am so happy for you. You and your husband will have a much deeper love for each other after the ceremony.
Actually, what you describe is the rite of marriage, but is not the actual nuptial blessing. The blessing itself, usually carried out sometime during the liturgy of the Eucharist, is an ancient prayer previously said over the bride but now often said in language that includes the groom as well.

Here is information _about_ the blessing: http://www.catholicculture.org/lit/P...iew.cfm?id=770

Here is the text itself: http://www.catholicdoors.com/prayers...sh/p04350b.htm
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  #4  
Old Nov 9, '05, 9:11 am
Courtneyjo Courtneyjo is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Thank you. My parish priest referrred to it as 'blessing", but I can see that he meant "rite."
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  #5  
Old Nov 9, '05, 9:25 am
minncin minncin is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Are you saying that you are already married, but are now getting "married" in the Catholic church? Isn't that called convalidation or something like that?
My husband and I did that and we did it in the chapel. We just had our parents and children there and it was very short. Maybe 10 or 15 minutes. And we just dressed in our nice Sunday clothes. We also got corsages and buttoneers (sp?). It was very special for us.
God bless!
Cindy
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  #6  
Old Nov 9, '05, 9:31 am
Celia Celia is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Our convalidation was short and sweet. I wore dress pants and a blouse and my husband wore nice khakis and a dress shirt. My parents and his were witnesses; the whole thing took maybe 15 minutes. It was a very nice little ceremony.
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  #7  
Old Nov 9, '05, 10:01 am
puzzleannie puzzleannie is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

it is not usual to have a marriage convalidated at a nuptial Mass, usually there is a liturgy of the word, perhaps with a homily on marriage, the exchange of vows and blessing. down here a lot of couples want a lot of the Mexican wedding customs such as the lazo, coins etc., so with all that, and the required padrinos it can take an hour. Almost all convalidations are witnessed by our deacons so naturally no Mass.

If you mean are you already married in the Church and having a blessing on your anniversary, that is often done during Mass either after the homily or after the communion prayer, takes just a few minutes.
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Whatever the Lord pleases He does, on heaven and on earth, in the seas and all deeps. Ps. 135
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  #8  
Old Nov 9, '05, 11:06 am
cameron_lansing cameron_lansing is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Courtneyjo
My parish priest referrred to it as 'blessing", but I can see that he meant "rite."
Just to try to categorize, there are 4 different things that could be meant by "blessing a marriage." It sounds like Inkits is describing the first. If you wish, Inkits, PM me and I'll send you the text of the questions, declarations, and the wording of vows. But I think the other posters have covered those parts well.

1. It could mean convalidation. This is commonly called "having one's marriage blessed," but this is inaccurate and misleading. In the Latin Church, simple convalidation is the new exchange of marital consent between a man and a woman whose marriage could not have been recognized as valid previously.

It involves the same questions, declarations, and the exchange of vows that would be used for any Catholic wedding according to Rite of Marriage. There can be the optional blessing of rings. It can take place within a Nuptial Mass, another Mass, or outside a Mass.
A. In some cases, a cause of invalidity has been removed in some way so that now the couple can marry validly. Often this means a decree of nullity was obtained. and sometimes, that a certain impediment (an obstacle to a valid marriage) was dispensed or ceased to exist. (A dispensation is a relaxation of Church law by a competent Church authority.)The couple must now exchange marital consent anew properly according to the Catholic form of marriage described below..

B. In other cases, the parties were free to marry in the first place, but they were also required to observe the canonical form of marriage for Latin Catholics. While marriage requires the consent of the parties, a certain form of celebration is normally required for the validity of a marriage involving a Latin Catholic. It requires exchanging vows in the presence of an authorized Catholic cleric and two witnessses. Otherwise, the couple needs a dispensation to celebrate the wedding in a different way, such as before a non Catholic minister. (There are some special other cases, too.)

Without the form or its dispensation or in certain other special cases, Church law considers such a marriage to be invalid in the sight of God. The couple must now exchange marital consent anew properly to be validly married.

Also, the Church never dispenses Catholics so they can validly marriage simply before a civil official. A couple otherwise free to marry yet who did this would also need to exchange marital consent anew properly.

When a couple married civilly or in a non Catholic religious service following the divorce of either, the convalidation would serve both the purposes described above in A and B.
2. In the Latin Catholic Church, the nuptial blessing is an optional prayer which is included the Rite of Matrimony and done later after the vows have been exchanged. This kind of blessing is an invocation for God to protect and aid the couple in their married vocation. It does not create the bond of marriage. Others have referred to this.

3. The Latin Catholic Church also has certain blessings for married couplesin its Book of Blessings. Priests or deacons give them. This kind of blessing is an invocation for God to protect and aid the couple in their married vocation. It does not create the bond of marriage.

4. In the Eastern Catholic Churches, the blessing conferred by the priest is the required form by which marriage is entered. While marriage requires the consent of the parties, this legal form is normally required for validity when an Eastern Catholic weds.
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Do all that has to be done without complaining or arguing and then you will be innocent and genuine, perfect children of God among a deceitful and underhand brood, and you will shine in the world like bright stars. Philippians 2:14-15
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  #9  
Old Nov 9, '05, 8:39 pm
Inkitcresteds Inkitcresteds is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Thank you to all of you!!!! This has made the whole thing so much clearer to me. Yes convalidation is what we are having done on Friday.

You were all a huge help!!!!
Inkits
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  #10  
Old Jan 10, '07, 6:09 am
Elin Elin is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Quote:
Originally Posted by cameron_lansing View Post
Just to try to categorize, there are 4 different things that could be meant by "blessing a marriage." It sounds like Inkits is describing the first. If you wish, Inkits, PM me and I'll send you the text of the questions, declarations, and the wording of vows. But I think the other posters have covered those parts well.

1. It could mean convalidation. This is commonly called "having one's marriage blessed," but this is inaccurate and misleading. In the Latin Church, simple convalidation is the new exchange of marital consent between a man and a woman whose marriage could not have been recognized as valid previously.

It involves the same questions, declarations, and the exchange of vows that would be used for any Catholic wedding according to Rite of Marriage. There can be the optional blessing of rings. It can take place within a Nuptial Mass, another Mass, or outside a Mass.
A. In some cases, a cause of invalidity has been removed in some way so that now the couple can marry validly. Often this means a decree of nullity was obtained. and sometimes, that a certain impediment (an obstacle to a valid marriage) was dispensed or ceased to exist. (A dispensation is a relaxation of Church law by a competent Church authority.)The couple must now exchange marital consent anew properly according to the Catholic form of marriage described below..

B. In other cases, the parties were free to marry in the first place, but they were also required to observe the canonical form of marriage for Latin Catholics. While marriage requires the consent of the parties, a certain form of celebration is normally required for the validity of a marriage involving a Latin Catholic. It requires exchanging vows in the presence of an authorized Catholic cleric and two witnessses. Otherwise, the couple needs a dispensation to celebrate the wedding in a different way, such as before a non Catholic minister. (There are some special other cases, too.)

Without the form or its dispensation or in certain other special cases, Church law considers such a marriage to be invalid in the sight of God. The couple must now exchange marital consent anew properly to be validly married.

Also, the Church never dispenses Catholics so they can validly marriage simply before a civil official. A couple otherwise free to marry yet who did this would also need to exchange marital consent anew properly.

When a couple married civilly or in a non Catholic religious service following the divorce of either, the convalidation would serve both the purposes described above in A and B.
2. In the Latin Catholic Church, the nuptial blessing is an optional prayer which is included the Rite of Matrimony and done later after the vows have been exchanged. This kind of blessing is an invocation for God to protect and aid the couple in their married vocation. It does not create the bond of marriage. Others have referred to this.

3. The Latin Catholic Church also has certain blessings for married couplesin its Book of Blessings. Priests or deacons give them. This kind of blessing is an invocation for God to protect and aid the couple in their married vocation. It does not create the bond of marriage.

4. In the Eastern Catholic Churches, the blessing conferred by the priest is the required form by which marriage is entered. While marriage requires the consent of the parties, this legal form is normally required for validity when an Eastern Catholic weds.
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  #11  
Old Jan 10, '07, 6:12 am
Elin Elin is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

In our case, we were marriage 23 years ago (now parents and grandparents) by a legally ordained minister in California. My husband was Baptized in a Metholidist Church and I was never baptized. Last year I was received into the RC Church at the Easter Vigil. My husband was not. Our priest told us he thinks he can "bless" our marriage? Is this so and what does it mean?
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  #12  
Old Jan 10, '07, 6:23 am
puzzleannie puzzleannie is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkitcresteds View Post
Hello everyone
I am new to the forum and never did find just what I was looking for so I thought I would just post a question. My husband and I are having our marriage blessed on Friday, what can I expect? I have no idea what the priest is going to do or how long it will take. What should I wear? My new priest is so busy with such a large congragation I never did find out all the details...just to be there at 6pm. Can anyone help me???

Thank You
Inkits
I am not sure what you mean by a blessing. If you mean you are simply commemorating your original vows and receiving a blessing on your current valid marriage, you will probably be called up after the homily, or after communion, introduced, receive the blessing, be congratulated by the congregation and that's it.

If you mean your civil marriage is now being convalidated, that is, you are exchanging vows with the priest or deacon as the official witness of the Church so that your marriage becomes valid in the eyes of the Church, you are from the Church's point of view being married for the first time. There is a lot more to it. At least in this state you need another license, two witnesses, and some preparation (here it is attendance at a Convalidation Conference with other couples and presenters who explain and teach the meaning of Christian marriage).

The exchange of vows is the same as in any Catholic celebration of the sacrament of marriage. It can be done during a special Mass, during any Sunday or daily scheduled Mass, or before or after Mass, or outside Mass in the Church or chapel. If outside Mass, it can include a Liturgy of the Word (readings, usually related to Church teaching on marriage) and may or may not include a communion service. If many or most guests will not be CAtholic, a communion service is not a good idea.

If you are having an elaborate ceremony you and your attendant may wear whatever you want, even a wedding dress. If it is a simpler quiet ceremony, whatever clothes are especially appropriate for Church --dress or suit for women, suit for men. Modesty is the key word to remember here (you may have to remind any friends or relatives who are not used coming to Church).

The marriage will be recorded in the parish sacramental record, and you will receive a certificate of marriage, and the annotations on the new license.

sorry did not realize this was an old thread already answered, I am losing it, but then, you knew that.

congratulations anyhow, tell us how it went, with pix if possible.
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Whatever the Lord pleases He does, on heaven and on earth, in the seas and all deeps. Ps. 135
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  #13  
Old Jan 10, '07, 4:49 pm
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Little Mary Little Mary is offline
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Default Re: What happens at a marriage blessing??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkitcresteds View Post
Hello everyone
I am new to the forum and never did find just what I was looking for so I thought I would just post a question. My husband and I are having our marriage blessed on Friday, what can I expect? I have no idea what the priest is going to do or how long it will take. What should I wear? My new priest is so busy with such a large congragation I never did find out all the details...just to be there at 6pm. Can anyone help me???

Thank You
Inkits

A good friend just did the same thing and treated it as a wedding - nuptial Mass, wedding dress/veil, tuxes, candes, flowers, invitations, reception, food, etc. It was beautiful.
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