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Old Jun 23, '10, 7:50 pm
Andy7 Andy7 is offline
Trial Membership
Join Date: June 23, 2010
Posts: 1
Religion: Catholic
Default Is holding a grudge a sin?

Long story short: I have a girlfriend who I have been with for nine months and it's been the happiest of my life but something is not bothering me. Before we dated we were Best Friends Forever and didn't know she loved me the way I loved her as more then friends. But we couldn't be together for some reasons family-wise. But made a promise to each other to save sex for when we date. So before we dated she told me she broke her promise in tears. She slept with her ex a few times and, on another occasion, gave him a sexual favor short of full relations. I forgave her after three months of being in pain. It stopped bothering me but now after nine months of joy it bothers me. I have such a hate and grudge what can I do? How can I get over of feeling betrayed? And is it a sin to have a grudge?

Last edited by Michelle Arnold; Jun 24, '10 at 12:04 pm.
Old Jun 24, '10, 12:01 pm
Michelle Arnold's Avatar
Michelle Arnold Michelle Arnold is offline
Catholic Answers Apologist
Join Date: May 3, 2004
Posts: 5,123
Religion: Catholic
Default Re: Is holding a grudge a sin?

To answer your question, holding a grudge can be sinful. But to answer the real underlying problem here, I must tell you that based on the situation presented here and on details I edited out for the sake of privacy, holding a grudge appears to be the least of your problems.

Your girlfriend has experienced serious problems that are beyond your capacity to help, and which may contribute to her apparent inability to remain faithful. She might need professional help for those problems before she is ready to consider a romantic relationship with anyone. In addition to that, you both likely are too young for this kind of relationship and you have skewed ideas of chastity (by your own account, you probably are having sex outside of marriage, which constitutes fornication).

I can only recommend to you that you end this relationship immediately, and that you seek to become better educated about the Church's teachings on chastity. Catholic Answers' chastity outreach program Pure Love Club may be able to assist you further.

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