16 year old has an abortion - how can we help?

The daughter of a friend of ours has had an abortion, unbeknown to her parents. They now know. She is 16 years old. The abortionists did their usual job of lying about the consequences of the procedure and that it would sort out everything.

She has had some minimal counseling and says she is okay. She is not. The boyfriend (17 years old) dumped her after taking her to the abortion mill telling her to “just sort it out”.

This family is very dear to me. What can I do ? Where can I go for help for her - she says she doesn’t want more counseling. Is there a website or a book that may help in this ? Obviously this would be just one thread in the process, but a start.

With much love,


Pray for them.

Are theu Catholic? If so, perhaps your diocese has resources to help? If not, their church may have similar resoures.

Pray for them.

Gently offer help in any way you can.

Pray for them


She may say she is fine now b/c she may not know the consequences b/c she is young…she will feel the consequences later in her life if she knows God…her parents need to help her, get her to counseling or else the abortion will have lasting detrimental emotional consequences…which it will anyway but it already happened so now they have to deal with the aftermath…

Thank you for this website link. I ordered the book healing through Divine Mercy. Perhaps she is not ready for it, but her family and I am.

Quite miraculously, Rachel’s Vineyard are holding a seminar that her parents or sister can attend, in their home city in just 2 weeks !! And that is in the UK !!



Rachels Vineyard and keep praying. You can’t push her into healing, but you can pray for her until she is ready and be there when she is. It sounds like you need to be there and help the parents to heal right now.

Everybody reading this should pray for the soul of the little child who never got a chance at life. It would be the meanest of gods who did not allow such a soul straight into heaven.
This is beyond terrible…and it happens millions of times, every year, in all parts of the world. The loss is incalculable.

That’s great!! :thumbsup:

Rachel’s Vineyard is such a blessing.

**You can bet this tiny soul has been joyfully welcomed into heaven! ** And all the other souls of the children killed by abortion. Our God is a loving, compassionate God who invites all to the Heavenly banquet, especially the youngest and most vulnerable.

Hug her mom and dad, grieve with them for the lost baby. Encourage much counseling for the entire family, and Rachel’s Vineyard is the place to begin.

Be there for the grieving grandparents. Someday their daughter will start reacting to the enormity of what she did.

The monstrous lies the world has been told… you be the fountain of truth and compassion. Someday she’ll realize her boyfriend never loved her and the people at the clinic never cared.

Pray for her, but also for her parents to be supportive, patient and understanding. I know she can’t undo what she’s done but she will certainly feel the pain later in life, especially when/if she chooses to have children again.

Shortly before we got married, I found out that my wife had had an abortion. It devastated me at the time but I couldn’t turn my back on her. It had happened a few years earlier, about a year before she had our son (she had him when she was 16, 4-6 weeks before I met her). Her “extremely religious” Catholic parents didn’t give her a choice in the matter. They explained to her that she was way too young to have a child, that her family would disown her and that no decent man would want anything to do with her if they knew she’d had a child out of wedlock. She firmly believed those things at the time (and again when she found out she was pregnant a second time, although she was in the 3rd trimester when she found out and her mother was unable to find a local doctor willing to perform the abortion) and spent a lot of time later in life trying to convince herself that it was the right decision.

Even after we were married she assured me that if she’d had two children instead of just one I never would have been interested in her. I don’t believe that would have been the case, but I think, at the time, it helped her deal with what had happened. I think she knows now that I would have loved her just the same.

Although I know she’d had problems with it at other times over the years, the real pain hit when we were pregnant with our first daughter. It came back when we found out we were pregnant with our second daughter and has hit both of us since we went through our miscarriage. It’s extremely difficult on me to think about what we missed out on. I know that only gives me a window into how hard it is for her, but I also know that we both take some comfort in knowing that both lost babies are in God’s hands looking down on us.

I pray that your friends’ daughter finds the support she needs to deal with any pain that comes later in life.

As comforting as this is, it just is not the teaching of the Catholic Church. We cannot be sure what happens to these unbaptized souls, but we can pray for them and trust in God’s mercy and compassion.


Thank you. :slight_smile: What I meant to say was I know for certain Jesus would never leave these souls out in the cold.

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