3rd order and discerning


#1

Do you have to discern if you should join a 3rd order like you would to become a priest/nun or do you basically just go to an introductory meeting and they help you discern if you should join or not?

Thank you =)


#2

I belong to the Secular Franciscan Order ( Franciscan third order) and I can tell you that discernment is a very important process. It took me 2-3 years of enquiry sessions for me to be professed but it is something that I know I am called to do. To belong to a third order we are called to live the rule and way of that order in the secular world.


#3

yes, I think so. You have a strong draw to an order or discipline. Which one are you interested in?


#4

You have to discern before joining any society but certainly before any Order.

I looked at them too in hope it would provide me direction and I did not follow it because simply not for me but without discerning or thinking about it I would never have known.

But you would want to think about something fully before joining wouldn't you - which is what discerning means per se:thumbsup:


#5

[quote="robwar, post:3, topic:322281"]
yes, I think so. You have a strong draw to an order or discipline.

[/quote]

I agree. I visited a couple of 3rd orders & read about several more. It was when I visited a Franciscan fraternity that I had that "aha" moment & knew it was for me. However, it took a surprisingly long time before I was professed. I think I was just a slow learner. :o


#6

If you feel a draw towards a 3rd order but would like to know more about what it entails, how to join, etc., ask the order for more information. I’m pretty sure for the SFO that you would be welcome to go to one of their monthly meetings as an observer, but find a location and give them a call.


#7

Most definitely! I've attended meetings for 3 months for the Lay Carmelites. Soon, I'll have a meeting with the Formation Director. If I join, it's a 3 year formation process.


#8

And then three more years before final profession. :slight_smile: Along this spiritual journey the council is discerning as well as you.


#9

well thank you for all the helpful answers. i was looking into the Lay Dominicans. They seem right up my alley.

I think the only thing that keeps popping into my mind is just certain questions such as :

do i really need to be in a 3rd Order to lead a holy life?

will this take time away from my main vocations (father/husband)?

just basic questions like that keep popping up. i contacted the director a year ago but my son was just 4 months old and i just felt that at that time I had to be around to help my family so i never did anything about it. but for some reason I have kept coming back to it 2 or 3 times sense. :shrug:


#10

[quote="Trying2bssint, post:9, topic:322281"]
well thank you for all the helpful answers. i was looking into the Lay Dominicans. They seem right up my alley.

I think the only thing that keeps popping into my mind is just certain questions such as :

do i really need to be in a 3rd Order to lead a holy life?

will this take time away from my main vocations (father/husband)?

just basic questions like that keep popping up. i contacted the director a year ago but my son was just 4 months old and i just felt that at that time I had to be around to help my family so i never did anything about it. but for some reason I have kept coming back to it 2 or 3 times sense. :shrug:

[/quote]

I'll answer your questions through my own experience, and maybe it will help a bit. I believe I needed to be in a 3rd Order to grow and mature in my faith. I was about 37 when I was invited to a meeting by a friend that I confided in. At that time, my oldest daughter (I had eight children) was a teen and I did not know how to relate to the rebellion she was in. I became more and more anxious about it and wondered what to do about this "bad girl".

Being in a 3rd Order should not take time away from your main vocation (father/husband). It should enhance that vocation!

For me, the 3rd Order Carmelites began in 1975 and it changed by spiritual outlook, and my prayer life. Being in community with like-minded persons, although very different personalities, is very supportive.

It is true that there may be a wrong time to start, such as when your child was a few months old. But the Holy Spirit does not let up, and the desire to check out 3rd Orders persists! :)


#11

[quote="Dorothy, post:10, topic:322281"]
I'll answer your questions through my own experience, and maybe it will help a bit. I believe I needed to be in a 3rd Order to grow and mature in my faith. I was about 37 when I was invited to a meeting by a friend that I confided in. At that time, my oldest daughter (I had eight children) was a teen and I did not know how to relate to the rebellion she was in. I became more and more anxious about it and wondered what to do about this "bad girl".

Being in a 3rd Order should not take time away from your main vocation (father/husband). It should enhance that vocation!

For me, the 3rd Order Carmelites began in 1975 and it changed by spiritual outlook, and my prayer life. Being in community with like-minded persons, although very different personalities, is very supportive.

It is true that there may be a wrong time to start, such as when your child was a few months old. But the Holy Spirit does not let up, and the desire to check out 3rd Orders persists! :)

[/quote]

I've been interested in 3rd Carmelites. Thanks for sharing, I know it's a long process which is good. any other suggestions please share.


#12

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