Find out if there are some communities a reasonable distance away from where you live, and get in touch with them. Mention that you would like to attend a meeting or maybe more to see what it is like.
I am a Lay Carmelite, and have been so for forty years. I had always been attracted to St. Therese of Lisieux, and also St. John of the Cross and St. Teresa of Avila. I had read biographies of the latter two, and the book A Story of a Soul which is Therese’s autobiography.
So, when in my late thirties a dear friend took me with her to her Third Order Carmelite meeting, it was like a ton of gold bricks fell on me! I had never even heard of Third Orders! And I needed that community and discipline badly! It changed my spiritual life for the better.
It is different for everyone…some take longer to discern, and the beginnings of being in a Third Order still has a discernment period.
For me it changed my life, and I still attend monthly meetings.
We promise to (not under pain of sin, but we take these promises seriously) to pray Morning, Evening and Night Prayer of the Liturgy of the Hours. We also are asked to do one half hour a day of quiet prayer of our choice, such as reading scripture and pondering it (that is Lectio Divina) or a Rosary.
Depending on our state in life, we should attend weekday mass when possible. When I first started most of my children were very young, so I couldn’t do that, but when they were all in school it worked for me.
At our meetings we do Lectio Divina altogether as a community for about 35 minutes, as a community; and we also read the Carmelite Doctors and saints and then discuss questions and share . Those studies are ongoing.
Peace, and fruitful searching for what is right for you!
It would have to be a good reason to not attend a meeting.