Hello, and thanks ahead of time for any help answering this question. If a Father can weigh in even all the better. As I have seen many men struggle with pornography addiction and the mortal sin of masturbation that normally goes along with it, I too struggle with this as many others do.
My question lies in the act being a mortal sin or not. I grew up in foster care, was later adopted, and then molested between age 6-12. From age 6 I was shown very disturbing pornography, not just normal everyday stuff. Of course I was shown this nearly every day while molested. Now I detest the molestation but have had an addiction to pornography I guess since that age. I pray about it daily, I do well at times, but do eventually give in. I feel horrible, and always immediately pray, but always end up doing it again and again just to keep askign for forgiveness knowing it is wrong.
Because I know it is wrong, is it a mortal sin every single time? Or am I cut a little slack due to my upbringing and 33 years of it being hard wired into my brain. I feel wretched and lost when I give in, but so very proud when I don’t. But what is there to be proud of knowning I will fall right back into it. ??