A few questions?

I am a freshman in a Catholic High School, and I love learning about the Catholic Faith. I have a lot of the Church Doctrines memorized, and I know every practical rule in the book.
However, I am a sinner. A huge one. I bet I have 10 different kinds of very embarrassing mortal sins on my soul right now. I (somewhat) try to do God’s Will in my life. I pray daily, even if it’s just a few moments.

However, I feel guilty every day about giving in to simple temporal pleasures too much, like watching TV. I think God is asking me to get out of my English class because it’s honors and I am proud in a bad way about that. I have a horrible self-esteem that causes me to want to be better than everyone else at everything, which means I have to idolize academics and sports. I try to find my fulfillment elsewhere other than God in these temporal things. And I have severe anxiety.

My question is: why do the other kids, who ignorantly, I presume, do these things and more, get to receive the Eucharist, sometimes on a daily basis, and I’m the one stuck not taking the Eucharist and going to Confession only to get into a state of mortal sin a week after Confession.

Pax Christi,

P.S please pray for me.

The answer, as I’m sure you’ve already surmised, is that you take your religion more seriously than they do. They don’t take the precautions their ideology requires either because they don’t care or because they don’t truly agree with the ideology.

It’s not very surprising, really. Many of my peers declare themselves “Catholic” just to fit in, not because the philosophy itself resonates with them.

Your still young and it’s very good that you are taking your faith seriourly well done, keep it up and never give up. I wouldn’t worry about other poeple and how they live their faith because you cannot control what they do. You can only control youself.

When it comes to the sins that you commit dont forget we are all sinners and that from time to time we all do things that we are not proud of. It all comes down to maturity
and over time as you grow spiritually you will come to see that the many sins that you commit will become less and less and then none.

To get on top of your sins go to confession as you already know because everytime you go you become stonger against the things you are weak towards and the sins you commit. Also do the Rosary even a little part of it everyday. It will help you turn away from worldy desires world things that are not good for you. Even if you start with only one decade of it everyday beause you are young and porbly have alot of school work to do.

how is your prayer life?
by the way, prayer has some interesting terminology/related being defied… a dry prayer, or 'ending in a peaceful prayer, or being distracted in prayer…then there is praying in front of the Eucharist (when the red candle is burning in the chapel.);
an old priest give me some advice that has served me over the years, and i could not find a way to argue with it…He says to me in confession,“the church has both saints and sinners.”

I think what the wise old Father was helping me with…had been to try to teach me what a true conscience is…as opposed to a false conscience, where the last might include the inquiry-why be anxious…when i had not done any thing wrong in the first place…

i think i am reminding myself to give a good effort and take time to pray, as i am any body reading this…a dry time of prayer might compare to someone in a desert-it is lonely, (you cannot pray);there, i might feel a bit lost with no moral compass; i might be angry or fearful that takes the place of a peaceful ending to prayer; in fact, being in a prayer desert-distracting thoughts seem to win…over peace…a distraction is kind of like a fly buzzing around, and can be…but is also a bothersome anxious thought…i am sure your confessor can advise on prayer/
meanwhile, hope to recognize the perfect moment in prayer…don’t give up; trust and pray-no matter what…a good sacramental life makes a good prayer life (well done on going to confession)…one last point to take up with the confessor, if helpful…is to check with him to see if it were possible to take each little distraction and sort of place it in a glass jar, as if marbles flowing through a funnel; well then, as similar to that jar is taking each distracting thought, one by one…then hopefully entering a silence, centered in the Holy Spirit…listen to a small still voice-a guarantee from your Baptism of Spirit…in that voice remain for a bit…then i believe (as discussed with your priest); that moment of your life can be discerned as parts of our humanity- we are soul, mind, heart, and body/ i am wondering if if the Holy Spirit would let you stay in your english class and sports with his blessing? perhaps so! Soon, that prayer desert will offer a rain-thirst quinched…a promise to end prayers in a peaceful state…!!! thx patrick

I woud print your post and have your confessor read it. Secondly, you can only benefit from spending time with our Lord at adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. Have you ever spent a holy hour with our Lord? Miracles happen there.

Hi! It’s nice to see such a young person taking their Catholic faith seriously. :slight_smile:

As to answer your question, many Catholic youth either just don’t care, or don’t agree with the Church’s prohibition on receiving in a state of mortal sin.

I know it can be hard. I see many Catholic youth receiving the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin. Perhaps you can start receiving kneeling and on the tongue, to emphasize to your peers how sacred the Eucharist is. Maybe they will learn to start receiving in a state of grace.

Conversion by example, my friend. :slight_smile:

Hi SandwichOrder. That was a very brave post. Do you have a priest you could see on a normal basis? like a confessor or spiritual director? I would suggest getting one if possible. I am very glad you take your faith seriously and recognize the sins you have committed. Trust me brother/sister, I am not even close to perfect; I am a big sinner. And we are all in need of God’s love, mercy, and forgiveness which he offers us in Confession. I am happy you see the need to go and reconcile yourself with God.

I know it is difficult living in this day and age. There are many distractions that swell up our minds and keep us from God. Make sure you keep God in your daily life as much as possible. Keep receiving the sacraments and stay fervent in faith. Lead by example and pray for your friends who need help.

We need more Catholic teenagers like you.


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