[quote="marysdaughter22, post:11, topic:207340"]
Maybe you're right that this person was reacting emotionally because what you've done echoes (in her mind) the unhappy household she grew up in. Of course you are entitled to what you believe and even though she is more liberal (the term people generally use - not necessarily true) in her beliefs that doesn't make it right for her to characterise you in this way. Often 'liberal' types can be just as intolerant as anyone for those who are different.
But is that all there is to it? Because in one way the letter comes across to me to be quite eloquent and heartfelt... are you sure that you haven't given her any cause to say those things? Surely it would take a lot for someone to come out and make a statement like that.
In my experience, even though people know that I'm religious and hold some more traditional views, I haven't had problems with those people or vice versa, I haven't been told that I'm living a life of 'turmoil and judgemental hostility' (admittedly a very offensive accusation that this friend has made) - occasionally people have felt I was naive and too idealistic, or out of touch in my beliefs when we've discussed them but with that there is an attitude of acceptance, live and let live. That has to go both ways though.
Perhaps you could express your belief in the sanctity of life without having to blast 'planned murderhood' - you never know who is listening or what they may have been through and what pain you may be causing. And why would these couples at your old church hate you for not believing in contraception? Whenever I have expressed any view of that kind people have looked at me as if I've grown an extra head but hate me? Definitely not. Maybe the problem is that you're so caught up in your beliefs that you have been trying to force them on others too much?
As much as I admire your strong principles, I can't admire letting that get in the way of behaving charitably and sensibly, and just being sensitive to the feelings of others (IF indeed that has happened - i'm not accusing you, just to give a perpective!). And sometimes, there is a time and a place for what you say and do. For instance, this is just my personal opinion, but I don't believe it's appropriate to bring a child along to stand outside an abortion clinic. I think that's more than a child needs to deal with - at seven I certainly didn't have a clue what abortion was in the same way as nobody had ever discussed the holocaust with me or told me what rape was. If they had, I would have just been confused and frightened by it.
Sorry if this makes me sound like a 'watered down' Christian, that isn't my intention. I'm just giving another viewpoint and saying that what I would take from a letter like this (as upsetting as it must have been) is maybe a heads up that I need to think about how I'm coming across and whether I might be going to extremes and alienating people, not so much with my views but with the way I express and live them out. But then again I haven't met any of these people or been privy to what has been happening, it sounds difficult for you, and I'm sorry if I've misinterpreted the situation. God bless.
I don't think her letter was eloquent and heartfelt I think it was passive aggressive. (I like you guys...but you are cruel to your children). The only cause we've given her to dislike us and attack us is when liberal viewpoints are put forth by people from church we disagree and "cause waves" on their sinking ship. (sorry but that's what it is). You can't have a "live and let live" with pro-aborts at church that mock pro-lifers in front of you, when you do pro-life work at the clinics. (which parish member 2 does-see my husband's letter). I only call it "planned murderhood" on my own facebook page not in conversations with other parishners. I should be able to give my opinion on this organization how I see fit on my own page (she chose to be offended by it-since she was a "friend" on facebook). That's one of the first nasty letters I got from her chastising me for calling them that on my own page like she's my mommy or something! The only people I have on facebook (before she was added as a friend) were friends and family 99% of which are pro-life.
Only one couple from that church hates us for our view on contraception (the ones with 3 going on 4 kids). The reason is they asked us what we think is acceptable for married couples (contraception or not) we told them about how the IUD, the pill etc. are abortificient. I even gave them the Christopher West "Good News for marriage...." book. They went to NFP seminars....but the husband was not interested in "following the rules" so she got pregnant (she's 38 and he's 41) they were both upset over it. He blames us. She's now getting a tubal litigation after she gives birth. (to which in our conversation they know we don't agree with). These aren't strangers, they've been to our house to visit on Saturdays spent the night and gone to church the next morning. They've been to Easter dinners, birthday parties etc. Now they hate us for the pregnancy and our unchanging view on contraception. Nope no "forcing our beliefs on others" there.
Real charity is being honest about how you feel when someone asks, (as opposed to lying to avoid disagreement). I usually warn someone "you might not like what I have to say but..." (when they ask) As for us bringing our children to abortion clinics. They're our kids we aren't going to leave them with a sitter when they can be with us and there is nothing wrong with praying outside an abortion clinic and quite frankly my daughter knew at two that it was wrong to hurt a baby and yet some adults just don't get-go figure.