So I went through a break-up about 8 months ago now and have been trying to move on with my life. I moved into a new apartment with a friend of mine and am trying to work on being happy for the sake of being happy. I tend to overthink everything that I do and am very black and white with things. My family and friends keep telling me that I have to find some grey in my life.
This girl started working at my job a few months ago and we’ve been talking at work. She’s the type of person who gets along with everyone. It seems so easy to talk with her and that’s one of the things that I enjoy about her. The attraction has kind of grown into a kind of silly fantasy of hanging out with her and just enjoying our time together. My other coworkers know this and they have mixed opinions. Most tell me that I should go for it, but there are some who think I might be trying to fill a void left by my old relationship. They want to see me happy, though.
A few issues with this is that she’s kind of anti-religion. Well, she doesn’t like people pushing it on her. I can understand this because I have had some struggles with this myself. But with my last relationship, I tried to be there for her at all times. I tried to show her a kind of love that comes from religion. I tried to share my views and beliefs and she’d just tell me that was my opinion and she had her own. I’m told that I did too much for her and that it was one-sided. But back then, I thought love was putting up with anything and everything. I found that’s not always true.
She’s also younger than me. This was an issue at first, but people have told me that compatibility doesn’t necessarily mean dating someone around your age.
Also the fact that she works at my job and it doesn’t allow relationships for the simple reason of drama at work, which I understand.
My parents, family, and friends want to see me happy instead of wallowing as I have been. And she makes me happy. The problem is I’m not sure if it’s okay to be happy with it. But part of me really wants to try not over-thinking things for once in my life and go with what my heart feels. But I also am aware that this can lead to complacency.
She likes singing and she’s really good at it. I enjoy singing as well, but I haven’t sung at work. She wants me to sing for her and it’s become kind of a thing to the point where I told her that I sang for a coworker last week and she cried. I thought she was kidding when she told me she was going to cry but when she did, I felt bad and at the same time, it felt nice to have someone care to that extent because that hasn’t happened in awhile.
She also likes my poetry and it also feels good to have someone appreciate that as well. She keeps the poems that I write for her and jokes about them.
She asked if I’d ever gone out on a date and that led to a kind of playful discussion of our favorite restaurants. I mentioned a specific one and she got excited asking if anybody wanted to go with her. In the back of my head, I wanted to tell her that I was off the next day but I bit my tongue.