A person I know is moving in with his fiancee

Even though they’ve been engaged for 1 3/4 years, I recognize that you’re not supposed to move in with someone until you’re officially married. The thing is he’s more of an acquaintance than a friend, so I don’t know how I should approach this. I know he’s Catholic (pretty sure practicing one), and I’m friends with him on Facebook. I never see him in real life, so how’s the best way for me to approach this?

Also, I’m pretty sure he’s not the kind of guy to stay with someone for a decade before doing something.

Edit: thanks for the answers. You may be able to tell, but I suffer from scruples, so I wanted to ask to know whether it was just me or not. I have met him in real life, but that was years ago, but this probably doesn’t make much of a difference. You guys are always so helpful. Thanks!

If he’s just an acquaintance, especially since you’ve never even met the guy, you really don’t have anything to “approach.” This isn’t your business.


If he’s an acquaintance I really don’t see how you can make any difference in his choice. Sure, you can preach something on his Facebook wall if it’ll make you feel like you did something. But I don’t really think it’ll do anything… ya know? It’s not like he’s a aware that some people in society frown on what he’s doing. And you don’t sound much closer to him than “some people in society.” If you were a friend or family it might be different. Maybe.

One problem I see here that pre-dated all this was their choice to stay engaged for 1 1/2 years. Worth noting.

1 Like

Why do you feel you need to approach it at all?

1 Like

. . . . You don’t really know this guy or the situation.

Just pray for them both, and ask God to please resolve the situation for this couple - either make them marry soon or break up.


Since you know about it, pray that God help them to make good decisions and to have good Christian people in their life that can have meaningful conversations. There could be a sibling, an aunt, a co-worker, who is close to them who can impact their choices more than a post on facebook.


You don’t.

1 Like

You pretty much have to get engaged about a year in advance just to reserve a church and a wedding reception venue and other things you need around my area. And some churches make couples do fairly long pre-Cana prep. 1 1/2 year engagement is not all that unusual.

1 Like

Altho we are enjoined as a spiritual work of mercy to admonish the sinner, this should only be done under certain circumstances.

It is necessary if you are in a position of authority over the person–a bishop to a priest under him, or a parent to a minor child.

Or if you are close to the sinner and there is a good chance he will listen to you.

You do not need to admonish every time you hear someone is about to sin!


Did he ask your opinion?

If you give your opinion will he be likely to say, “hey thanks for the advice, I’m not going to move in with my fiancé?”

1 Like

This needs to be printed on posters and pasted everywhere Catholics congregate!


This topic was automatically closed after 25 hours. New replies are no longer allowed.

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.