A question for women (about men)

Would it bother you if a man used the women’s toilets?

Let me expand…

Last week I (a man) was caring for a woman with mental and physical disabilities on a day out in a different town, when it came to needing to take her to the toilet, the public toilets were locked so I took her to the nearby swimming pool.

I couldn’t find the disabled toilet and when I asked a member of staff she said it was in the women’s toilets. I said it didn’t bother me but I worried that one woman might take offence.

So it isn’t a solitary man wandering in but a man taking a woman in to be changed, does that bother you?

Thankfully that day they let me use their staff toilets but I’m sure it won’t be the last time I’m faced with that dilemma.

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If this is for your job, you should ask your employer what the protocol for those kinds of situations are.


Not in the slightest, assuming there were individual stalls for toilet use.


I personally don’t care as long as he isn’t harassing women and isn’t being a gross slob. I have used a number of unisex toilets, with stalls (so women were not having to look at strange men’s organs or to disrobe in front of men) throughout my life without incident. I would also totally understand if a man needed to assist an elderly or disabled person, or a dad had to accompany his young daughter.

However, I know from experience that there are women for whom men in the “women’s room” are perceived as unsafe, sinful, and/or scandalous, regardless of whether they are doing no harm or have a reasonable basis for being in there. One of these women who found men in the ladies’ room to be the horror to end all horrors was my own mother who had a major blowup with me lasting about 3 days when I was in college and one of my school club facilities, where I spent lots of time, had a unisex restroom. My mother was aghast at this and got angry because I did not see it as a big deal. I would add that, college and my other haunts being a wild and not particularly moral place in those bad ol’ days, there were people of both genders regularly running around in various states of undress including with pants down and all kinds of other immoral-by-Catholic-standards stuff happening, so I had gotten quite jaded about it, and people relieving themselves in a unisex restroom was the least of my worries.

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