A Rather Awkward Encounter


Today, I was at play practice and when waiting for my ride, I heard a rather sad conversation. There is a young woman who came out as a transgender male a while ago (to my understanding) and apparently her mother took her to see a priest recently. From what this youth said, the priest said that he’s heard she thinks she’s a boy and went on to say things about gender dysphoria, how changing the body to fit the mind is not right, and how she needs to think about how her loved ones will feel about such a change.
Well, there were two others standing there besides me and they both seemed to be on her side of the argument, one young man even going as far to use foul language when talking about how his parents are conservative and how some of his friends are in the Church (I don’t know if me meant they are Christian or Catholic) and how he finds it hard to talk to them because his views are so different.
I just stood there, not giving any judgement or opinions from either side of the arguments and instead, silently prayed for them. I’m not sure what I should have said, if anything? It made me really uncomfortable.
Also, please pray for these young people!

I’m not convinced the priest went about this in the right way but I also have no clue if what this young person said was true or in the right context. I think we need to be open to helping those who struggle with their identity but also be firm in our beliefs. We need to not shut them down and instead, listen to them and hear where they are coming from. Also, I’m not sure it’s appropriate to take someone straight to a priest? Wouldn’t a psychologist be better?
This youth claimed there are no Christian psychologists in our area and other psychologists for gender are on her side. Yet I see a psychologist who is a Christian. She just isn’t marketed as that because she works in a hospital and not on her own. I couldn’t say anything because she left soon after I heard her say that.

I don’t know if this youth (I’m so confused at what to use gender-wise so I say the name around her and the real gender around my family) is trying to convince themselves that it’s okay and that they are right?

How are we called to respond to situations like this? Perhaps there are any who struggle with gender dysphoria who could give insight? I am not going to ignore either of the two who spoke nor would I show them anger, I just would like to be better prepared if I need to be and also to ask for prayers for them!


I am praying for that young person and all who have body image problems.

Our Father
Hail Mary
Glory Be


You should avoid her since there seems to be a lot of drama and if you say the wrong things it could get bad for you. I think it would be better to pray from a distance.


Are you in high school?

Also, was this a conversation you were in, or were you listening in on others?


This is exactly the advice I was about to give. Excellently stated. Thank you.


Well I don’t seek her out and I haven’t really talked to her much.

@Tis_Bearself I am and I was right in the lobby where the conversation was being held quite loudly. I don’t think there was any intention for it to be a private conversation as it continued when I was there. I had left to use the restroom and when I came back, that was the topic of discussion and so I stood where I had stood before I went to the restroom with my things, waiting for my ride.



I think you’re best off just praying for these people from a distance. I have known a lot of people with gender or sexuality issues, and quite a few people think they are gay or gender dysphoric in high school and then change their mind when they are older.

And usually the ones who actually ARE gay or gender dysphoric arent making a giant drama out of it.

It’s not worth getting into a big heated conversation over something a person may well grow out of in 10 years.


Thanks for the advice! I think that’s a good idea. I just didn’t know if I should be defending the Catholic viewpoint but I think she’s not interested and I really don’t need drama… theater already as enough of that lol


When someone is talking to you directly you can defend the Catholic faith then. No need to rush into every conversation everyone else is having. Save your energy.


You can “rush into conversations” on CAF, but NOT in real life.


Considering you mentioned that this is a play practice, I’m just going to say as a professional actor that getting into discussions of gender and sexuality in that group will always be against Church teaching.


Meaning that their take on the subject will be against Church teaching or that it’s against Church teaching to voice my opinion in a conversation with that group?

I’m definitely going to take people’s advice here and not say anything and just pray from afar and still show them kindness :slight_smile: thanks everyone!


It seems to me the priest did exactly what he is called to do. People frequently “shut down” because they are hardened in their sin to the point where they completely disregard any law or gospel that is proclaimed to them.


I don’t think the church recognizes gender change, so the person would still be recognized as female by the church. Although, I think the Priest should not be condemning of it, while still affirming the church’s teaching. That’s his job as a Priest after all, but I don’t think the church explicitly condemns the phenomenon, it just doesn’t recognize it. It’s a serious problem, and the evidence supports transitioning as the most helpful solution.


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