'Adult' surprise for husband.

All these threads on porn have prompted me to ask:

Is recording an ‘adult’ dvd for your husband a sin in the eyes of the Catholic Church?

Sarah x :slight_smile:


Yes. And I don’t like these kinds of explicit threads. I wish they were disallowed.

I thought as much :mad:

There was nothing ‘explicit’ in what I asked. I deliberately used the term ‘adult’ and deliberately did not discuss content.

Sarah x :slight_smile:

I believe it is, but even if it wasn’t, it is still a bad idea. You never know if a guest or your child may stumble across it. :eek: Just a bad idea.

That couldn’t happen.

But in what way is it sinful?

Sarah x :slight_smile:

The intimate expression centers around lustful feelings rather than pure unconditional love. It is not only gravely sinful…it is also very harmful to every martial relationship.

You’re making judgemental statements rather than explaining to me why the Church says it’s sinful.

It’s not harmful to our marital relations, I can tell you for a fact.

And it’s done within the confines of an unconditionally loving, strong marriage.

It’s a little bit of fun and spice.

So why is it sinful?

Sarah x :slight_smile:

It is the making and viewing of pornography. A grave sin against the sixth commandment.


So, a wife - cough - dancing for her husband, would be making pornography in the eyes of the Church :confused:

I seriously don’t get this :confused:

Would writing him an intimate letter, reminding him of a place we’ve been to, and what happened, and in the process of telling him how much I’m missing him (he’s away on business right now) the letter morphs into a shared fantasy, be also viewed as pornography by the Church. :confused:

Does the Church really just expect me to write:

Dearest Husband,
Enjoy your trip.
Get those contracts signed and don’t forget the chocolates!

To my Husband!!! :shrug:

Sarah x :slight_smile:

I’m still trying to get past this idea that asking this sort of question, putting ‘adult’ in quotes - meets someone’s definition of “explicit.”

This question is rhetorical,pretty sure you know that.Are you trying to provoke a debate on the sinfulness of viewing pornography for the sake of stirring things up,mocking the Church?:mad:

All moral and theological discussions aside, let’s say that something happens to you and your husband. Members of your family are going to go through your house and sift through what to keep and not keep. Do you really want anyone to find that? As weird as it sounds, approach your belongings with the idea of, “If I died tomorrow, would this harm the way people remember me?” Do you want your grandmother to find that tape if something happens to you?

I certainly hope you won’t die until you are very elderly and have lived a long and happy life, so let’s look at another situation. Don’t assume that a thief breaking into your house will avoid personal videos. The fact that it might be porn would probably make them want to take it! With today’s instant-access communications and file sharing, that stolen video could end up on the internet where it will stay FOREVER. You won’t be able to completely eradicate it. This could be incredibly embarrassing and have negative effects that could affect job prospects, family, and friends.

Some things should be so private that no one but the spouses there should have any ability to see it. What you do, even with your own spouse, has ramifications that could be very damaging if it even unintentionally left your hands. Our society, with its Paris Hiltons and Kim Kardashians, wants you to believe that these kinds of tapes are normal and not harmful. After all, it makes some people famous! This is a big lie, because it takes intimacy that should stay private and it reduces it to a piece of media that could be shared with those that have no business seeing it. By making any kind of tape you run a big risk of your intimacy being used and abused rather than respected.

If “cough” = naked dancing or pole, stripper or otherwise removal of clothing while dancing, then yes.

Given the serious confusion in the secular world that tries to normalize pornography, I can see why someone who has likely been told that there is nothing wrong with it would think that way.

Nothing wrong with this. Unless by “reminding him what happened” = exlicit detailing of sex acts.

Pornography can be in writing, yes. Sounds like your purpose is not to tell him you miss him but rather to arouse him through either explicit images or words-- yes that is grave matter.

No. What you have written above is not intimate. It is something I would write in an email to my boss.

Intimacy would be: I love you. I miss you. I can’t wait until you get home.

I mean, really, your idea of expressing intimacy with your husband must encompass pornography? that is such an impoverished idea of intimacy.

Now that he’s read that shared fantasy what do you suppose he’s going to do about the resulting…feelings? Take a cold shower?

That’s exactly how it is.

Rather than going into detail, I just used dvd as shorthand for the fact such media exist, and I create them for my husband occasionally.

Only he and I can view them.

The chances of them being found are almost zero, and the chances of being viewed if found, are zero.

They’re also not kept longer than necessary :wink: and are just a bit of fun :slight_smile:

Sarah x :slight_smile:

well interesting that this is brought up by a " regular member " whos screen name is " atheistgirl " .

one has to really wonder why the question was really asked indeed, of the OP is looking for a response in the form of, No the Church doesn’t consider it a sin, or have a problem with it since it is in the confines of marrage, then one is looking in the wrong place for a such a response. And then to bring up well where does the Church say it is a problem or a sin… these types of questions are only leading one to an arguement that is not intended for any real purpose. The op will not find a suitable answer. You are on a Catholic Forum , do you really expect to get a response of, eh yeah the church really doesnt discuss let alone hit on points as you have brought up plus you are married an it is between you an your husband, so dont worry about it have a nice day.

It does not matter that you and he are the only two that view them-- they are gravely wrong and as I said before sins against the sixth commandment.

My ex-husband’s girlfriend thought the same thing until the picture she gave him ended up in my 12 year old son’s hands.
It sounds more like you just want to argue rather than ask advice.

Why yes this is a perfect note. If he remembers what happened last time he brought home chocolates.

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