I am a Catholic married to an Adventist. I thought it would be more difficult in many ways than it has been. I guess maybe because my husband is probably more of the Progressive Adventist type and his family are not adventists.
What kind of challenges do you face?
The biggest challenge is having a husband who will not pray with me. I miss not having the entire family attend mass together. But then I look around the church and realize I am by far not the only person attending mass without a spouse. It is a silly complaint.
What compromises have you made?
My husband decided to have a vasectomy against my wishes. This was very hurtful to me. I have not been as involved in the church as I otherwise might be if I had a Catholic spouse.
What compromises do you refuse to make?
We had a full Catholic Mass for the wedding. All the children have been baptized and raised Catholic. We have religious education in the home even though my husband refuses to participate. Mass attendance by myself and the children is mandatory. We have rosaries, and religious objects in the home. We have Catholic bibles and I have bible study with the children and others from our church. The kids went to Catholic school when available.
I refused to use artificial birth control.
I refuse to go to the Seventh Day Adventist Church because when I attended they bashed the beliefs of others and I felt their church was based on conflict with other Christians rather than a love of Christ.
What has been the reaction of family?
My family has adopted my husband as one of their own despite religious differences. His family are Protestants but not SDA. Some of them kind of ignor the kids and myself. However, one of my husband’s brothers once said to me, " I don’t know what you are doing with your kids, but whatever it is keep it up because you have great kids"
In which faith do you raise children?
Catholic - all the way.
Would you recommend that he pursue marriage, given the challenges?
Yes - provided he is very strong in his faith and sets forth a head of time the things he will and will not compromise. Dispite all my husband is my best friend. My husband is very respectful of my faith and does not try to change me even though those at his church have told him he must not be living right if I will not convert. Fight it out ahead of time and then stick to it.
Do you have any other insights, or words of advice?
Take your time in courtship. Lay down what is important to you and what you will or will not compromise. Always stick to those things. Let the other know that God is first in your life and will always be. If the partner cannot accept that about you then they are also rejecting you. Use the Sacraments - especially confession and the Eucharist. They will keep you close to Christ.
Been married 24 years this month.