Advice Please: how do you get peace?


#1

I got some great responses from my last question. Here is one that I can really use help on.

The main question is “How do you get peace in your life?”

My story is that most of my life had challenges but the past 5 - 6 years have been very tumultuous (parents passing away, work problems, and of course money problems). For that period of time, the minute I felt peace, BANG , something else bad came along in a very short period of time. I have tried every which way to deal with this - pray / beg God for help, get mad at God, ignore God - pray to saints, pray to my deceased relatives, everything - but the lows are getting lower. And all I do is go through this same routine over and over.

I recognize that life is never perfect - but this stretch has been terrible. I also well realize that others have it much worse than me - but I still have trouble dealing with all the negative that is going on.

Let me also say that I have a wonderful, supportive wife and a wonderful son that we adopted from Russia - but I can’t be my strongest for them because I am having trouble dealing with all the “stuff” going on. I am also thankful that the three of us are all reasonably healthy.

So, what do I do? How do I go about getting and feeling that God is behind me? How do I get enough strength to deal with all this?
How do I not feel that I can’t enjoy even the hours of peace because I feel that just around the corner in another punch coming ? I am getting no rest at all now (both mental and physical).

I would love to say that I have the strength to deal with all my problems (even compartmentalize them if need be) but I get overwhelmed.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated .
Thank you.


#2

Are you depressed?

I went through a time or two of misery in my life. It was during this time that the Lord helped to directly apply virtue to combat my inner pain. If you focus on things like patience, non- self focus, love and faith you may see a difference. Offer up all of this suffering for someone else, perhaps your family. When you offer it up let it go and live in each individual moment with Christ. We need his strength not ours, you need his spirit in you. I find adoration to be a great place to focus and be filled with his consolation. Have you spoken to a Priest about this or looked for help? Hope this assists you.

-D


#3

Do you pray before Jesus in the Holy Eucharist?

I have found that my hour of adoration contributes greatly to my sense of peace despite the storms of life around me. If I miss a week, I notice the difference.

Do you have regular prayer times – Morning Offering, Rosary during the day, Chaplet of Divine Mercy, Night Prayers? Regular prayer time also helps me greatly and again, I notice a difference if I miss it.

I’m also trying to say very short prayers during the day as things arise “Mother Mary, Pray for me,” “Jesus, I trust in You,” “Be with me, Lord,” and sometimes simply “Help me God.”

Hope some of these might help you.


#4

[quote=RalphG]I got some great responses from my last question. Here is one that I can really use help on.

The main question is “How do you get peace in your life?”

I am getting no rest at all now (both mental and physical).

I would love to say that I have the strength to deal with all my problems (even compartmentalize them if need be) but I get overwhelmed.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated .
Thank you.
[/quote]

I don’t know what kind of words would help. But I do think you identified the real problem.

Rest is necessary. Time spent not carrying burden’s. It may mean giving up the idea that you will be able to carry burden’s that you have carried for a long time. It may mean not living up to what your wife and son have come to expect.

The commandment to love one’s neighbor as oneself requires that you love yourself

Take care of your self. Meet your fundamental needs. Like getting rest if you need it. And then do what you can for others.

Try to make sense of the words of Jesus: “Come to me you who are burdened and weary. Take my yoke upon you, for my burden is easy and my yoke is light.”

peace

-Jim


#5

I have found peace among the chaos. Alot of it involves identifying what I can and can not control. If the situation is not in my control then it is something I must endure and learn from. If it is then I can start taking steps to fix, or deal with it. When I have done these things I then am SLOOOWLY learning patience. With that patience with God, myself, the world I am finding peace.


#6

ralphg–we’re praying for you.


#7

Everybody is different so what works for me may not work for you. Having said which try reading the gospels. I always find that reading the words of Our Lord and encountering his wonderful personality always refreshes me. I am also strengthened by the sacraments, especially the Eucharist.

When all else fails I just repeat ‘Lord Jesus Christ Son of God have mercy upon me a sinner’ because I am used to saying it frequently it has a very benificial effect on me. Getting into good habits is an underrated way of transforming our lives. Maybe its worth trying for you.


#8

Psalm prayer
My soul has yearned for you in the night, and as morning breaks I watch for your coming.
Antiphon
We have placed all our hope in the Lord, and He has given us His peace, alleluia.


#9

submission to the will of God, acceptance of His divine Mercy, pursuit of everything that leads to knowing, loving and serving God, and rejection of everything which separates one from God. In a global sense, as Pope Paul VI reminded us, if you seek peace work for justice. full justice is the accomplishment of God’s will.


#10

Truly trusting in God means that we can be calm and assured in both good times and bad. We achieve this by letting God teach us humility.

Humility is the virtue that shows us who we are in relation to God. It teaches us that we are not God, that unlike God, we cannot control some situations in our lives.

My husband is currently unemployed too. And it isn’t easy sailing, I know. But, we have given our hearts and minds to God so that even when he’s had ten interviews and no job offer or as many rejection letters, we just go on.

Not that we don’t feel disappointed or unhappy, but at our core we are at peace because we know that God is taking care of us.

It’s rather like surfing or ice skating or riding a bicycle, which all demand a sense of balance to do properly. Trusting in God in humility gives us that sense of balance that allows us to keep going even when we think we are headed for a nasty spill.

God has his time in which he does things for us, and we have a sense of the time in which we want things to happen for us. We have to learn to be on God’s time–to simply rest in his care while he works behind the scenes for our good. And believe me, he hasn’t forgotten you. He is simply doing things as he sees fit within the time he thinks best. All will be well. As John Paul II always said: “Be not afraid.” I will pray for you and your family. Please pray for us!


#11

[quote=RalphG]I got some great responses from my last question. Here is one that I can really use help on.

The main question is “How do you get peace in your life?”

My story is that most of my life had challenges but the past 5 - 6 years have been very tumultuous (parents passing away, work problems, and of course money problems). For that period of time, the minute I felt peace, BANG , something else bad came along in a very short period of time. I have tried every which way to deal with this - pray / beg God for help, get mad at God, ignore God - pray to saints, pray to my deceased relatives, everything - but the lows are getting lower. And all I do is go through this same routine over and over.

I recognize that life is never perfect - but this stretch has been terrible. I also well realize that others have it much worse than me - but I still have trouble dealing with all the negative that is going on.

Let me also say that I have a wonderful, supportive wife and a wonderful son that we adopted from Russia - but I can’t be my strongest for them because I am having trouble dealing with all the “stuff” going on. I am also thankful that the three of us are all reasonably healthy.

So, what do I do? How do I go about getting and feeling that God is behind me? How do I get enough strength to deal with all this?
How do I not feel that I can’t enjoy even the hours of peace because I feel that just around the corner in another punch coming ? I am getting no rest at all now (both mental and physical).

I would love to say that I have the strength to deal with all my problems (even compartmentalize them if need be) but I get overwhelmed.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated .
Thank you.
[/quote]

Know Jesus, Know peace! No Jesus, no peace!
Give your life completely to Him and He will show you the way.
I used to have so many problems to deal with until I finally let go and trusted Him.
St. Augustine said, we will be restless until we rest on the Lord.

God Bless


#12

Hello Ralph!

I pray that God hold you close and guids your head to His Shoulder. Ask to rest in Him. Ask Him for strength. He will give it to you.

I know this may have you rolling your eyes, but bear with me. Christ is closest to us when we suffer. Try to surrender to God and pray for strength and courage. If you ask, especially if you ask in light of His Passion, he cannot deny you (Jesus’ words to St. Faustina). Trust in His Mercy as was already suggested.

Personally, I have found over the past few weeks, praying the Rosary has brought tremendous peace in my life. Ask Mary and Jesus to pray with you.

I hope this helps.
Know that you are in my prayers.

Jade.


#13

[quote=Didi]Do you pray before Jesus in the Holy Eucharist?

I have found that my hour of adoration contributes greatly to my sense of peace despite the storms of life around me. If I miss a week, I notice the difference.

Do you have regular prayer times – Morning Offering, Rosary during the day, Chaplet of Divine Mercy, Night Prayers? Regular prayer time also helps me greatly and again, I notice a difference if I miss it.

I’m also trying to say very short prayers during the day as things arise “Mother Mary, Pray for me,” “Jesus, I trust in You,” “Be with me, Lord,” and sometimes simply “Help me God.”

Hope some of these might help you.
[/quote]

I have gotta endorse everything Didi has said. Eucharistic Adoration and tons of it! God gives us a special grace each time we visit Him at Adoration. And in the Year of the Eucharist, we get indulgences also.

How about Confession? Are you do for a spiritual tune-up through Confession? This helps the soul receive God’s sanctifying graces and opens the gates for peace.

I, too, went through a horrible year. Last year was by far the worst year of my life. Then the Holy Spirit led me closer to the church and Adoration, daily scheduled prayer, Chaplet of Divine Mercy, etc. Now I have more peace, happiness and joy then I could have imagined possible.

Let the Spirit guide you and listen. He talks daily to our hearts but we have learned to close them. How about adding another mass to your schedule if possible. Devotions to the first 9 Fridays to the Sacred Heart and first 5 Sat to Immaculate Heart of Mary.

These all add amazing graces to life and result in eventual peace.

You will get there, but you will need to put some effort and work into this journey to show God just how much HE means to you. Really worship God and God will reward you greatly!


#14

Thank you to all for your kind comments. I will take what you all say to heart and try to act upon it.

I have to admit it helped just being able to get this out in the open and have sympathetic souls try and help.

Thank you again. I ray for all of you.

Ralph


#15

you’re welcome. and we’re still praying.


#16

Hi. My nickname on this board is ‘Scorched Earth Ani.’ These days I have been going to Mass every day, praying a novena and a mystery a day for discernment among the cardinals for our new Pope. And I mean really praying the Rosary hard, concentrating on each mystery. With all this praying, I am sublimely peaceful. I just hardly have the energy to argue anymore. :slight_smile:


#17

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