That was unbecoming of me. As C.S. Lewis talks about in ‘Mere Christianity’. We are all aliens and visitors…stuck behind the lines. Our only means of communication home is through church and prayer. Why do you think that Jesus told us to go into private room and pray? So we wouldn’t get caught by the enemy communicating with Our Commander and Chief! What glory to bring to Our Country, Heaven to be caught working for our original home! We will be crowned…like given a medal of honor I guess…and raised to Sainthood ( we will be popular in heaven for our contribution?)
I pray for you that the Holy Spirit will open your understanding to the Truth and Love of God and remove any doubt and anxiety you may have from some propaganda from the enemy!
For real though, try praying to God personally about your doubts. He will answerer them. Guaranteed! Ask Him for a sign, He will give it. You maybe surprised. Remember, we don’t have a God of fear and doubt. As Padre Pio I think said…any thoughts that bring you doubt, fear, or anxiety are not from God. Don’t worry any longer and trust God. Everything will be fine.