Am I called to religious life?


#1

I have grown up in a quite religious family. When I was a kid we always pray the Holy Rosary everyday and go to mass every Sunday. When I was in High school once I experienced such great peace and happiness praying the Holy Rosary. So I ask my mother about religious life, but she gets mad at me and my siblings all laugh at me.

So I ignore it. I go on with my life, went to college then got a degree. Then I got these problems with myself, for I can’t seem to figure out what I want. I end up jumping from one job to another. I was never happy though I have some relationship but end up to nothing, then I undergo with depression but never talk to anyone about, I only speak to God through prayers. I pray so hard, for I thought I’m going insane. The more I pray my fears and worries multiply. I can neither sleep nor eat. Until I given up, I cried so hard and promised to never pray and stop believing that He exist and that moment I felt so bad and ask forgiveness, and I was like saying, “ ok I’m a miserable sinner, I don’t deserve anything from you. Do whatever you want in my life, for I am soo tired and please help me.” Then I fell in my bed and fall asleep like a baby and when I woke up I felt an overwhelming peace. My worries and fears still there but it doesn’t bother me anymore. That day I said to myself, I want to be a nun. But then my visa for working abroad arrives and I already have a schedule for my flight. So I promised myself to enter a religious life just when I finished my contract.

So after two years I got home, but I was left confused because my family needs me and my sister made a petition for me. So my promised to myself a years ago was never realized. After a couple of years, after my dear father passed away, I experience again, this kind of feeling of being at home and at a peace every time I visit the adoration chapel. And every time I attend the mass, I feel such joy, that I can never explain. I love God and want to serve him for the rest of my life, for He loves me.

When I talk about it to my mother, her reaction still the same, way back then, and I have this great fear of visiting a religious congregation because I was scared If I’m called for consecrated life for this will change my life and knowing myself, knowing how I value my freedom. I don’t know what to do. There’s no one I could talk about it, and so far I’m busy with my job, even visiting our local priest. So I’m hoping someone here know and understand how I feel. Please help me. Thank you very much. May God Bless us all…


#2

First, welcome, and God bless you.
None of can know what path God holds for you, but…
despite that you say you are very busy…find a priest that will agree to work with you and be your Spiritual Director. Together, you can navigate your feelings, the stirrings of the Holy Spirit, and all the other things that go into the discernment process if it really is for you.
He can also help you if you decide that you family needs you more.
Whatever the case, you need the counsel of a good priest who can guide you.
Will keep you in our prayers.
Peace.
:signofcross:


#3

Well, since you promised to enter religious life, you ought to do so. If you didn’t have the intention of vowing, then there is no obligation, but if you did, then you need to do so. If it is really not possible, and/or you’re sure that you’re called to another state of life apart from the vow/promise, a priest can dispense from the vow, but this is not a privilege to take lightly. If the vow was made in haste, then you can be absolved from the vow, but it should also be confessed, since vows are not to be made carelessly.

Even if you didn’t have the vow, it does sound like you have a calling, although I can’t tell for sure. Is there a desire to do so (I don’t mean a superficial one, or superficial desire against it; I mean a real sustained desire to enter that state of life)? You have to remember that God doesn’t normally tell us what state of life to enter into; that’s left to our choice. It’s important in discerning a vocation to be active in the faith, because it literally increases freedom. That is, we don’t have to worry about losing our soul over chosing the wrong vocation (if you’re a practicing Catholic who keeps the state of grace, then this is not normally a problem).

So I would say, in short, that because of your promise, you ought to go at least test religious life out (and neutrally, not just with the intention of entering with the idea of leaving), unless you’re sure that you don’t have a vocation otherwise, but you need to have the promise absolved by a priest with faculties to do so. Understand that if you enter as a novice, and after disinterested discernment there, leave because you know you don’t have a vocation, you can leave and you’ve fulfilled your vow (or promise), unless you vowed to remain there.

Sorry about the long answer.

I wish you the best,
Benedicat Deus,
Latinitas


#4

If you desire to be a religious, it is likely that God has put that desire in your heart. Nevertheless, seek advice from a spiritual director. Also, ask St. Joseph for his assistance in discerning your vocation.

St. Alphonsus wrote a helpful little work, titled ‘Vocation to the Religious State,’ which you might find helpful:

archive.org/stream/VocationToTheReligiousStateTakenFromTheWritingsOfStAlphonsusDe/Warren_Vocation#page/n1/mode/2up

The following words, which were spoken by Our Lord to St. Veronica Giuliani, may well be directed at you: ‘Tell them [your religious Sisters] from Me that I love them with an infinite love; that they must all give themselves to Me; that they must strip themselves of everything and abandon themselves completely to Me.’

God bless.


#5

By getting yourself a Spiritual Director he will advise you, also you could try a week end retreat at a Convent this might peak or not peak your interest.

I don’t know how old you are but a lot of Orders don’t take women over 35, but there is this lovely Order called “Servants of the Lord and the Virgin of Matara” who takes women of any age, it does not matter even very mature women, if you want to look them up
www.servidoras.org / or www.ssvmne.org. Wear the traditional Habit, grey habit, blue scapular and blue veil, no hair showing.

God Bless and Walk with the Lord


#6

Thank you very much, It was like you’re God send to me. I did went to confession yesterday as what you advised. And all my fears was blown away. I was so happy and grateful to God. And now I’m planning to take another step on discerning my vocation. I feel more excited and thrilled, knowing that God would be taking me to a different kind of journey where I know nothing what’s ahead, but one thing I know He loves me more than I love myself.

Again, thank you very much! And God Bless You…


#7

Thank you for the information. I did start a novena for St. Joseph, after I read your comment. And for the links that you shared from St. Alphonsus helps me a lot, for better understanding about religious vocation.
I wish you have a wonderful day! God Bless…


#8

Thank you. And God Bless You as well. I’m really glad I found this site it’s like God leads me to this place and He answers all my interior desires and give peace to my heart. I’m grateful for all the comments I received, like yours, because it guides me to a better understanding about the struggles on finding God’s plan for me.

I wish you have a wonderful day!


#9

Well, I’m glad I could help! God bless you in whatever vocation you end up selecting.

Benedicat Deus,
Latinitas


#10

Yeah, why not visit? It’s not going to kill you. And the folks running the various places expect that a good percentage of visitors won’t make it their final stop or destination.

Many people spend much time asking, “what do I want to do in life?” I think only a very small percentage of people really feel like they have an answer. I feel like there are many things that a person can do with his life.


#11

#12

Have you looked into which order to enter? Find out what you can about different ones and see if there is a “good fit,” then go and visit that order. This is as important as answering God’s call to be a religious. Each order has it’s own calling within the call. I mean, each has it’s own way of supporting itself and how it handles things like daily prayer, work, private time and all of that. Finding one that works might get a bit complicated. But if God is calling you to this, He will help you find the right place.


#13

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