Am i scrupling or is this really bad :(

I had a problem with a neighbor/roommate (well something in between. Sharing a hallway.)
Something happened that I really can’t stand (no details, I don’t like to write details about other people. Ok for clarification it did have to do with smoke in the hallway). I was in the bathroom down the hall when I realized, and I really got upset, maybe loudly opened a door, and loudly spoke to myself about how terrible it was and what I now all had to do to fix the situation…:blush::blush::blush: I am not sure if he heard me, as he had gone back to his room (after having had a visitor). It was already late, but I knew he was still awake (so the problem is not that I may have woken him up, but that maybe he heard me yell around and got perplexed or even offended.
Afterwards I am feeling guilty. Passing by his door I said an apology, but as he was watching TV I think I guess this he really didn’t hear…
Now it is a quarter to midnight. I think he is still up. I could knock on his door and ask whether he had heard me and apologize, but then I would have the smoke problem again (and I really can’t handle it, especially now with sinus problems after a cold). So instead I put a note on his doorhandle, saying something like I hope nobody heard that I had yelled around and I apologize (not mentioning what it had been about, for the case he didn’t make the connection, and as he will probably be leaving maybe it won’t be necessary to bring up the problem again…

Wondering now is this enough.
Ok, maybe he didn’t hear.
Maybe everything is ok.
But what if he did hear and is offended? Should I knock on his door anyway at almost midnight?
Doesn’t the Bible say something about resolving things before we go to sleep?
Am I allowed to go to sleep?!!!
Am I allowed to go to communion at mass tomorrow in case I don’t see him (either he leaves early and I don’t hear him, which is not so likely as the doors cna be heard well) or maybe he sleeps longer than when I am leaving…
Is the note enough???
Can I be at peace, or not? I already asked God for forgiveness. Had lost my nerves; isn’t happening as often as before, but well, it happened today…

I guess I will just ahve to try to sleep anyway, I think it would be unhealthy not to especially with not being completely healthy yet

This is your scruples talking. Please get some help from your pastor and stop obsessing about whether or not it is “bad” to be annoyed by the smoke down the hall and to ask that there be no smoke in common areas. There is absolutely NOTHING sinful in anything you have relayed in this post or the last. Please talk to your pastor.

Dear Ike
thank you for your reply.
Actually the scruples have gotten so much better recently, and I have had so much help from even a psychologist priest and been advidsed if possible to not ask…
So talking to still another priest (I am staying somewhere else now) would maybe even just draw me back in again.
I should not ask such questions here again though if I already suspect scruples…
Thank you anyway; I think a little insecurity once in a while is allowed, but now time to get back on the really good way I was on…

This being said, even if no sin, it was uncool to lose my nerves like that :// :wink: And I do hope nobody heard me. ;))))

I don’t think it was a sin either. Would it be helpful to you to take some kind of communication workshop/seminar? You know, the type of thing where they teach effective communication so that you would feel more comfortable and confidant expressing yourself directly to someone when there is a problem.

Glad you’re feeling better, hope you got some sleep and went to mass. Everyone gets angry sometimes, the fact that you realized you’d gone too far, and tried to apologize shows a lot of maturity in faith and in life.

Yeah I slept, it is morning now. :slight_smile:
I took the note away in case I see him, but if I leave before I hear him come out of his room I’ll put it back.

Thanks for the suggestion… I don’t think that is a problem, I usually am quite direct and open with people; just sometimes when I lose my nerves I get into this… self-tantrum kind of thing… which yeah, is immature… would help to think of all my blessings and say a prayer then maybe…

Fortunately it doesn’t happen so often… I think I also have a lot of inner healing behind me and such situations should not come up often anymore… I hope :slight_smile:

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