My boyfriend and I, both in our late 20s, starting courting a couple of months ago with a view to discerning whether we are being called to marry. We have agreed not to date anybody else. I posted recently in the Morality forum re keeping our relationship pure.
My boyfriend is very close to his ex-girlfriend. They dated for more than 4 years and broke up very amiably about a year ago.
My boyfriend continues to meet his ex once a week, just the 2 of them. They have dinner and then go along to their parish prayer group. They spend about 3 hours exclusive time together, apart from the time they spend with others at the prayer group. I am not invited along cos he feels it would be awkward having us both there together and also because it would be difficult for her. Plus, I live a bit away so I would be going out of my way to meet them.
My boyfriend has told me that he has no romantic feelings for his ex at all. He said that he has a very strong friendship with her due to the amount of time they were together as a couple. He has told me that I am the only person that he has romantic feelings for and that I should not feel worried about his friendship with his ex.
While I fully believe him about not having any romantic feelings for his ex, I really don’t like him meeting up with his ex on an exclusive basis so often. I asked him would he consider inviting some of the other members of the prayer group along to their dinner but he said that it wouldn’t be the same thing as they couldn’t talk properly in a group. My fear is that there is an ongoing emotional bond between them that is inappropriate. I would not mind them meeting up occasionally but this is more.
My first question is this - do you think that this is something I should really ask to be changed or is it something that I should just learn to get over?
My second question is this - i just found out that he is bringing his ex back to his family house in a weeks time to meet his family again. Obviously I’m not invited. I got quite a shock. Should this not stop when he starts courting somebody else?
Any advice gratefully received. Sorry for rambling!