Angered while in line for confession


#1

I don’t know if you have ever experienced this, but yesterday while being in line for confession there was a lady and her two children who were next for confession, well, of a a sudden a couple shows up and cut them off! I was like, fine, they probably did not seem to notice that we were in line for it. So they both cut off the three in front of me. Anyhow, anyone who wishes to confess usually sits all the way to the left area of the church at the very front (that is where we were). The couple sat a few seats more to the front but in the middle area so I understand that they could not see us. Anyway, soon after, other people started showing up and sitting next to that couple so I decided to go and ask them if they were there for confession and they said yes so I told them that the reason I was asking is that on the other side, a group of us have been waiting for a while “in line” for our turn. One guy said “me, too”. I was like whatever. Another guy did not say anything just blew me off and the other one had already cut us off, his wife was in there. Mass was about to begin and the ones waiting for our turn on the left side wanted to be confessed. We got there 45 minutes earlier for that.

Anyhow, the lady with her two children was up next, and one of those men almost argues with her that its his turn because he was there first. I was so outraged! I could not beleive this was all going on right before confession and for the ones that wanted to confess. I kept praying for God to take this feeling away and I just could not feel any relief. Finally the man comes out and he apologizes to the lady. That totally reliefed me, but the others, I was like what is up with you people. I am here telling you nicely that we have a system going on and you decide to be rude anyway and still cut us all off!

I later laughed about it, but at that moment I became so upset and I did not want to. I could not control it.

Bottomline, 4 people cut us off by the time they finished it was my turn it was already time for Mass to begin. I went in and father asked me how many were behind me and I told him about 5 or 6 and he was like OMG! Let’s get started quickly. He began Mass late in order to finish confessing all. Mass must have begun about 10 minutes late.

Has anyone being through this?


#2

No—our parish has a set time for confessions, and it’s early Saturday so it doesn’t interfere with any Masses.

How rude of them, though.


#3

I have been frustrated while in line of confession, but not because people cut into line. We have confessionals at our church and people in line, stand in line outside the doors along the back wall of the church. If you are sitting in a pew, you are not in line. perhaps you can ask your priest to clarify the process for how to wait for confession in an announcment or the bulletin. Also, our priests will not start Mass late because of confession lines. They will stop confessions at the appointed time in order that Mass starts on time. If you were in line, you just need to come to the next confession time or make an appointment for confession.


#4

I know that there have been a couple of times where it is not clear where the line is. Partly this is because people will sit in the pew after praying rather than form a line. I think that this is because there are five confessionals across the back of the church and people don’t know where to start the line until the priest gets there. It seems like lately though there have been enough people showing up for confession that they will have 2 or 3 priests come, so whatever lines form get worked through quickly.

There was one Saturday though where each person in front of us seemed to be taking forever with their confession and we were having to stand there for a long time. The woman in front of me was getting really angry about how long it was taking, and I told her (sort of as a joke) that she was going to have to add that to her confession. She lightened up, then everyone in line started making light of how long it was taking. It turned out to be one of the best waiting for confession lines I’ve been in.


#5

I wonder if they they got into the Confessional and confessed to cutting in line? :rolleyes:

People are so rude. Why do they even bother going to Confession if they refuse to act like a Christian when they’re in line?


#6

Maybe those people weren’t aware that they didn’t know where the line was, and maybe next time they will know better. We can hope…

There are three churches where I will go for confession, depending on where I am on any given day and what time they are having it. It’s kind of hard to tell at one of the churches who is in line and who isn’t, so if I’m ever in doubt, I simply ask (quietly, of course) until I find where the end of the line is. By the same token, I have had others ask me “are you in line?” and I’ll show them where the end of the line is. Is that so difficult? :shrug:


#7

Exactly! I was there praying not to feel the way I was and I just could not help it. It was ironic how we were in line to confess and we just all seem to be getting a bit angry at what was going on. I, too thought that the man must have confessed that he cut off someone. He came out all apologetic. It seems that he knew he was cutting off…Then I felt bad for him thinking that maybe he just had to go to confession so bad the he had to do what he had to do. Forget about “ladies first”.:shrug:


#8

Two or three priests!? That is awesome! We only have one. :o


#9

Does not hurt to ask. I even wonder if they knew where the line was (i.e., the ones that were just quiet waiting for their turn thinking it was there turn when instead it was ours). It seems to me that they knew and they just pretended not to know… :rolleyes:


#10

I’ve been to a few parishes where either the confession of others took FOREVER and I was denied confession due to mass needing to begin or there wasn’t a clear line for confession (sitting or two lines for one priest and two penitents entering the confessional at the same time - one face to face, the other behind the screen). I’ve been frustrated, but then I remind myself that maybe, just maybe that person who seemed “rude” was returning to the sacrament or maybe I thought I was prepared enough for the sacrament, but God caused the line to move slowly so that I couldn’t confess because He knew that I wasn’t aware of all my sins or truly repentant. This attitude helps me when the process of confession doesn’t go the way I want it to (no long line, plenty of time to talk to the priest, etc.)


#11

Wonderful attitude! Thanks for sharing those thoughts, I’m sure they’ll help me also.


#12

I was a little upset yesterday at confession because of the lack of privacy. I went to a Church that I never go to and sat down fairly close to the confessional to pray and wait my turn, there were only a couple of people ahead of me. As I was sitting there, you could hear everything that was going on inside of the confessional due to a window in the door that is just filled in with a screen :eek: I am good at blocking things out and I continued to pray. But once I got in there I became a bit self-conscious. Were the people outside, waiting in line or doing their penance listening to my confession?! All the other confessionals I have been in have solid doors so you can’t hear anything. Needless to say, I don’t think I will be returning there, at least not for confession. Has anyone else been in this situation?


#13

You got there 45 minutes earlier because you wanted to make sure you got to got to confession—you sound like me:D There has to be system, and when there is one going before anybody arrives, it shoud be respected----the problem is, that there will always be that certain someone who comes in later and doesn’t seem to notice where the line really is for whatever reason.

Whenever I DO arrive late, I kindly ASK “where does the line begin?” I want to know what the SYSTEM is, so that people will not get angry. And I wouldn’t blame people for getting angry, because confession in the first place is a delicate matter that puts my nerves on edge:o I guess you could call me sensitive. Can you believe people have actually looked at me weird for asking, as if I am disturbing the peace?? I am trying to PRESERVE peace believe me;) !

This is the REASON why I ask now: People have cut in front of me :eek: even as I stand in line, and I feel like really petty for being angry. I remember this one incident where this woman came in and just walked right in front of me:eek: , and I said, that the END of the line was “over there” I pointed----the lady in back of me tsked ME for being miffed, And the lady in front of me had the gall to look at me as if I were being petty—and she IGNORED me:mad: . To say the least, it ruined my peace of mind…but I have to be the BIGGER person and accept rudeness. AGH! It really made me think about how I NEED to let things go “Don’t sweat the small stuff”, as one very wise priest told me. Sure there are rude people—but Oh well:rolleyes:

However, I STILL ask because I don’t want to make people feel uncomfortable like those silly people made you feel. I don’t want to** be **the reason for anybody’s lack of peace because confession is important, and peace of mind is important to a prayerful attitude.


#14

Tha was nice that happened!:stuck_out_tongue: I remember a time this one person took a heaping 30 minutes in the confessional:eek: and the man in back of me was worried whether he’d make it to confession. I felt sorry for him and offered to let him go before me, but he refused. I was next in line, so I said to him jokingly, "Don"t worry— it shouldn’t take me long to say that I am a jerk:D " I usually make appointments for deep concerns that need spiritual advice, and confess my sins to the point , yet thoroughly. I also add that: X-amount of people are waiting after my confession.:slight_smile:


#15

Yes I have been in this situation, and I started praying Hail Mary’s in a loud whisper. My husband came up from behind me, as he arrived later to confession, and whispered at me"Hey, Hey slow down! Why all the fervent prayer?!" I guess he thought I must have done somethingREALLY bad:D I told him I could hear everything the person was confessing! I had to put my hands over my ears!:eek:


#16

No I have not experienced this because the confessional is at the back of the Church and no-one can cut in by being infront.

However I have experienced being told off by other parishoners for being too long in the confessional, I guess its the same thing, you were made to wait as my long confession made others wait.

I would say to you, whoever went before you probably had the most need and offer your waiting up to God for them and for your own soul. So you had to wait, maybe its a lesson in patience and bearing with the faults of others, so is it fair? No probably not fair, but not worth starting a campaign over either and certainly a good lesson in dying to self, your soul is no more important than anyone else’s. Indeed, would you not let your brother or sister go before you?

Perhaps you were not the one in need of most grace.

Your personally imposed penance may be to pray for all those in line for confession whether they jump queue or not!:slight_smile: They are your brothers and sisters, they are your family in God and don’t you love them more than yourself.

In the Living Prayer of my life


#17

I sure don’t mind being asked where the line is. I want to be asked to make things clear to everyone.

I guess everyone gets the jitters before going into confession, specially being that it is face to face.


#18

No I have not experienced this because the confessional is at the back of the Church and no-one can cut in by being infront. (the true first is last!:slight_smile: first on the last pew is first into the confessional!)

However I have experienced being told off by other parishoners for being too long in the confessional, I guess its the same thing, you were made to wait as my long confession made others wait.

I would say to you, whoever went before you probably had the most need and offer your waiting up to God for them and for your own soul. So you had to wait, maybe its a lesson in patience and bearing with the faults of others, so is it fair? No probably not fair, but not worth starting a campaign over either and certainly a good lesson in dying to self, your soul is no more important than anyone else’s. Indeed, would you not let your brother or sister go before you?

Perhaps you were not the one in need of most grace.

Your personally imposed penance may be to pray for all those in line for confession whether they jump queue or not!:slight_smile: They are your brothers and sisters, they are your family in God and don’t you love them more than yourself.

I often think, who am I that I should receive any good treatment? Afterall they did not treat my Lord Jesus very well.

Pride comes before a fall, they say.

In the Living Prayer of my life


#19

Yes, of course I would let them go before me if they would only ask. I sure don’t think I would ever do something like that (i.e., cutting them off). I am sure those people needed it more than I did.:o


#20

I could tell that many of us were nervous. It was really obvious. Yes, those who cut us off just made it worst. I am starting to believe that maybe I just got more nervous rather than angry…:confused:


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