I’m sure there are more layers and complexities than your short post can go into. So, I can’t deduce too much.
But speaking in general–in general–it sounds like your father and you have different beliefs and priorities. To some extent at least. And it sounds like your beliefs and priorities contradict your sister’s when it comes to marriage and sex.
Human relations will often have tensions when beliefs and priorities are not shared by all and the competing views contradict one another.
I’ve had to ask myself about this–from personal experiences but also from observations I’ve seen in other peoples lives as well as stories I’ve heard about other people.
What I’ve come to conclude so far is that it is best to just work on your own “backyard” if another is happy and content in their life. If your sister was Muslim, or Mormon, and one of several wives to a man I would feel the same. If your sister was lesbian and dating or legally married to a woman I would feel the same.
That does not mean you are wrong. It does not mean you are right. And it could be each person detailed in your post has varying degrees of truth or rightness.
One of my male relatives has cheated on his wife with the girlfriend of another of our relatives that has mothered his (her boyfriend’s) children. Not the first time. Between the two if God has blessed one it has been the adulterer. You would have to know their two lives to know what I mean.
But I’ve seen this played out time and again in life, throughout the world. The Muslim in the UAE that is professionally and financially well off and very happy in life. The Catholic (you can find them on this website posting) that is depressed in life and may even require medication, or if not require then depend on medication, prescribed by a psychiatrist to find some bit of happiness (my mother is a Mass attending Catholic on anti-depression medication). You have married swingers that are content and happy with their lives and marriage.
Both my younger brothers have shunned Catholicism completely. By far I am the most loyal to Christ and Church of us three. While I wanted my nephews baptized–if for no other reason than it was done to us, and if what is said of Christ and salvation is true, it is something of a metaphysical child abuse not to gift your children with the baptism you received–but my brother has not wanted them baptized (I suppose he regards anything of Christ as ridiculous). But I’m not going to go into all of the ironies as that would be too long. The point I want to make is that if God has handed down blessings then He has saw it fit to hand them down more abundantly to my brother. From the time we were knee high.
If-then statements being logical statements usually.
But I have my blessings and so that is what I chose to focus more on and I try to be grateful for them. I would hazard a guess my two younger brothers try to be grateful for their individual blessings too.
And I’m as vulnerable to envy as anyone else. Ironically my younger brothers are too. Probably more so than me. If they each had 3 expensive cars and 3 great mansions and 20 women each, they would still be driven with envy if I was dirty, broke, homeless, and bought a beat up car with my small wage, if I was happy with that car.
Every human is a child of some parents. So, in that sense we are all children irrespective of whether we are parents or not. As children we have looked to our parents for leadership and wisdom. And fairness. But often, for many, due to human vulnerabilities, limitations, personal biographies, and sin, their parents will not fulfill all those roles for them. And as we age we see the shortcomings of our parents more clearly.
It sounds like you want a Catholic dynasty–a history of glory perhaps–for your family. Nothing wrong in that probably. I can sympathize. I have no dynastic ambitions for my immediate family but if I ever have a family of my own I think that would be a ambition of mine. Perhaps not Catholic per se but in other respects.