I post this here because I am not sure where would be the best place. I am a convert to the Catholic faith (2015) and although I started off in a very liberal parish I have slowly transitioned to a very Traditional parish and occasionally attend FSSP.
I am a divorced and remarried mother and I had to get an annulment in order to be received into the church. At the time that I was given the annulment paperwork I didn’t exactly know what I was “doing” ( I say this because I thought that giving the paperwork meant that the church would tell me if my first marriage was valid, not that I was proclaiming it to be not valid…does that make sense?). I submitted my paperwork and my first husband never sent anything in. The annulment was granted ( I had to use the long form because we were both “baptized christians” so it was consided “sacramental”) even though it was all based on my responses and only my witnesses. The grounds were Canon 1095.2.
Fast forward to today. I now have a better understanding of the Faith and of what matrimony means in the Catholic church. Going through the whole process I was doubtful of the invalidity of my first marriage because I always thought it was valid but decided that if the church said it wasn’t then they knew more than I did. Even though I married my second husband in the Catholic church after the annulment I don’t feel that any graces were granted. In my head I feel that my first marriage was real.
I went and spoke with the priest at my parish and he agreed with me concerning my first husband and though that maybe my first marriage was valid. He advised me to call the Diocese…that went horribly…I was basically humiliated for even asking such a stupid question and the ladies in charge refused to make an appointment for me to speak to anyone on the Tribunal. This action made me feel very small and I decided to not persist further.
Now I am here asking the question. I am now aware of what an “annulment” means. I am aware that the church (especially in my liberal diocese) grants basically ALL of them. I see that canon 1095 is basically used to grant annulments using vague grounds when real grounds can’t be found.
I fear that I am offending Our Lord and my current husband is on board for us to find out the truth.
Any suggestions? Advise?