I have been told that lack of intimacy or/and affection in a marriage is grounds for an annulment. Is that true?
No that is not true.
A completely unconsummated marriage can be dissolved in some circumstances, but once it is consummated it is like 1ke said.
Annulments are granted on grounds of the couple’s mental state at the time of the wedding; issues that come up during the marriage are not taken into consideration.
Grounds for annulment apply only to what happened up to the marriage. Anything that happens after the marriage has taken place are not grounds for annulment.
So, if he doesn’t want to hold me, barely kisses me, and won’t have sex with me, it is just considered a bad marriage and not grounds for an annulment??? Why would God want me to live this way?
Perhaps He doesn’t. Perhaps it was not your call to be married in the first place. God did not marry you, that is a human endeavor fraught with errors. I suggest that you pursue counseling with a priest, and consider programs such as Retrouvaille or Worldwide Marriage Encounter. These are all things which can make great strides in saving your marriage, if it is meant to be. If it is not, then the Church is not against your divorce and living separately. You are certainly within your rights to seek a declaration of nullity after the divorce.
Have you had sexual intercourse with your husband at all since you got married. In other words has your marriage been consummated?
Yes, it has been consummated, however there is no affection. I am simply the cook, maid, mother of 2. Look good and shut up seems to be what I am called to do. The problem with just a divorce is that I was told that, in the eyes of the Catholic Church, children are considered illegitimate. Is that true too?
I don’t quite know what you mean about illegitimate children, but I am almost positive that is untrue if I recall a similar question in a thread some time ago.
Really, what you need to do is get involved with a priest. And not just one person, find a few different people to talk to and get advice from; be it a nun, brother, priest, deacon, whatever. You obviously need help in your life and you need to turn to someone who can help. It’s good to turn here for some advice too, but please get involved with a person who can talk to you and help you face to face.
Please try counseling with your pastor.
You seem to have been told several things that are not true at all.
Again, please seek out counseling with your pastor.