Any Fans of Dr. Ray Guarendi?


#1

I catch little snippets of Dr. Ray on Facebook or Catholic Radio. I sense that this guy has the answers to a lot of family and parenting questions I don’t even think to ask.

Has anyone here gained any particular parenting insights from Dr. Ray? What were they?

If so, which of his materials would you recommend starting with?


#2

Start with “You’re A Better Parent” and “Discipline That Lasts A Lifetime”.

Also, if he comes to speak at an event, go hear him.


#3

Thank you! :heart:


#4

I can’t think of any specific advice that has changed my life, but I do enjoy listening to him. I often catch him because he’s usually on at lunch time.


#5

I feel like I need summer “professsional development” for my new role as a SAHM. Especially since three of them just went to Grandma’s for a few days. The baby and I can soak up some Dr. Ray.


#6

I’m going to misquote him, but, one of the times I heard him speak live I remembered this line.

He was talking about people who say they have a “strong willed child” and how his wife, who is not very tall, had a much stronger will than any of the children.


#7

I used to work during the summers as a full-time (or at least as full-time as I could) volunteer at a Catholic Radio station. The station must always be monitored from every room so I frequently listened to his program as I worked. He was the one to introduce me to something called the psycho-spiritual approach to theology and spirituality which I came to find out was pioneered by Ven. Fulton Sheen. Dr. Ray’s program greatly shaped my pastoral approach in dealing with people.


#8

I like him because he un-pathologizes a lot of the puzzling or unpleasant children’s behaviors .
What I mean is, a caller will call in and wonder if their child is disturbed because they do “X”. He’ll break down the behavior with the parent and explain when a behavior is a red flag in and of itself or if it has to rise to a certain intensity, etc.

I also think his self-deprecating humor is funny


#9

" Fan " - is taken from the word “Fanatic” - Never heard of him before.


#10

He drives me nuts, and I don’t know anyone who listens to him. I also work in Catholic Radio.

How he has a job is beyond me.


#11

Is it what he is saying or how he says it that drives you nuts? Or is it one of those feelings you can’t really place you just know it’s there.


#12

Fair enough. By that definition, I don’t expect there to be many fans. Screaming hysterically at the sight of him, throwing themselves at his car as he tries to get out, chanting Dr. Ray, asking him to autograph their faces, swooning and swearing they’d never wash this hand again upon shaking his…:rofl:


#13

He has an hour-long studio television show, shown here [Northeast Ohio] on EWTN on Saturday evening at 10:00…worth watching.


#14

I have enjoyed listening to his show. I agree with most of what he says about raising a child. But when it comes to allowing a child the freedom of a certain amount of theological dissent, we part ways. I guess it’s a matter of opinion about whether a child’s particular dissent is actually important or not.

I think he is too forceful about getting Catholic children to accept Catholicism. Pushing that hard will drive some children away, and he seems to use the same unwavering, forceful approach for all children. It may work for some, but it’s too broad of an approach to work for every child and parent.


#15

That seems good advice @1Lord1Faith. Our kids all have different natures and needs.


#16

Would you point me to some examples from Dr Ray where he directs forcing children to accept Catholicism?


#17

I’m just drawing off of my memory. I don’t think I could actually find and cite anything.

I remember him saying, at least on one occasion, that if a child under 18, or perhaps even older, is living under his roof that they must attend Mass. Like I said, it’s also a matter of what particular dissent a parent thinks is important or not, but that particular example seems too forceful to me for an older teenager.


#18

That sounds like a good rule to me, but I guess situations could be different if for example the parents very recently converted and the teen was not brought up with any of it.


#19

Teaching children respect, that it is a family rule we attend Mass on Sunday/HDOs, is not forcing them to accept Catholicism. In fact, it is our duty as parents to teach our children to respect and that sometimes that means doing for one hour something that you do not like.

We are encouraged to keep the conversation open with our teens, let them feel free to ask hard questions knowing that questions won’t get them shouted down or thrown out. By modeling respect we raise our kids to be good people.


#20

I really like him, and sometimes catch his show or part of it during my lunch break. He has a lot of insight that is interesting and helpful.

My husband and I just had our first baby last month and I got his book Advice Worth Ignoring. It’s been really good so far. He goes through different pieces of “expert advice” and explains how that advice might actually be detrimental or unhelpful. Of course, each situation is different and he acknowledges at the beginning of the book that his own “expert advice” could be ignored as well. As a mom taking care of a child for the first time, one hears a lot of snippets of advice, and for me it’s been good to get different points of view to decide well whether something will work or not.


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